You're so amazing
Always adorable for me
When you move,
It always makes me smile
When you talk,
It always touches my heart
Looking at your angelic face
Makes me happy all the time
My adorable angel,
In this lifetime, would you be mine?

You ask me,
Do I miss you?
How can I miss you?
You are always with me,
Your face behind my eyes,
Your soul sleeping in my heart,
The essence of you dances for me,
Sinuous curves shimmy within shadows.

You ask me,
Do I love you?
You should be asking,
How much you love me?
Then measure that feeling,
Holding it tightly deep inside,
Knowing that I feel just the same,
With every single fibre of my being.

You ask me,
Do I miss you?
Perhaps, I might sigh,
The very truth, though,
Is that I miss you terribly,
Is that part of me aches for you,
Though we are intrinsically entwined,
Sometimes, such closeness is not enough.

You ask me,
Do I love you?
Do you need to ask?
I live and breathe you,
As you live and breathe me,
Your roads lead to me, woman,
I am by your side, holding your hand,
One day, we will surely arrive together.

You ask me,
Do I miss you?
Everyday baby,
Never doubt it is so,
My pain is like your own,
Insomnia, numbing, yearning,
Hiding tears in the soft darkness,
But knowing, we will be free, one day.

©Paul M Chafer 2015

She sat
Cross legged
Tea in her hands
And just begged
That today would be a good day

Where do I fall into your life?
or is that all
do I just fall?

I struggle to have a good life and by this I do not mean a happy one, I am happy, I simply mean I want to live a life I can be proud of and lately my mind has been caught in a fishing net with every corner having loose truths and conned dispositions, I dream of a life with nirvana, with such a profound amount overwhelming peace you can hardly stand it.
I have a special skill of feeling a lot when I probably shouldn't and feeling nothing when I should.
I still mix up left from right and often forget where I am going while trying to figure out where to turn next
I still mix up my rights from my wrongs
But I am writing my wrongs and hoping that doing so will help in the process of correcting them, forgiving myself for them
I am a hopeless romantic with the absolute potential to be alone the rest of my life
When love finds me, I am terrified
Staring in the face of commitment is beautiful but a risk I am often not willing to take
It thrills me when people say they do not love me anymore, it burns like a fire in my stomach and I sometimes confuse the likely possibility that other people are not thrilled by this
I think a breeze could feel like a hurricane if it hits you at the right time
I am learning to control myself and taking only what I need from the world
I am still baffled by the fact and also completely terrified at how when I look him in the eyes I never fail to be reminded of you
I will sometimes lay out to watch the stars at night but regretfully I do not even do this for my own enjoyment anymore I do it to think of you, I ask myself if you look at the sky for the same reasons
I have been told I am an open book, running through pages as if a strong breeze was rolling by, emptying all of the things carved into my skin, from by passers, best friends, ex lovers, strangers, blowing each syllable off the page
My mother has always been right and I always knew she was
I am stubborn and have a hard time moving my opinions or motives
I am slowly learning why natural disasters are given human names
I find myself wanting to catch your thoughts like raindrops on my hands and watch them dissolve, your words are a hurricane in themselves
I like flushed red cheeks and cold fingers warned by a fire
I enjoy watching attempted sweet talk however I am never sure how to respond to it
And no I do not drink to forget about other people's mistakes, I drink to forget about my own
I sometimes scream at the mirror, it is one of the safest ways I could think of to take out anger on myself
There is a pen connected to my mind and I often wish the people in books were real
And I love this world with all of my heart and I love life, I want to crawl under every tree, dance on every mountain, swim in waterfalls, drown myself in this world's excellence
Paint my body with it's colors, wash my skin in it's prayers, listen to it's music and let is resonate in my mind until it reigns in my brain when silence is too loud
I like opening doors more than closing them, I open too many and twist my mind into patterns I am alice trying to find her wonderland but there are no maps for the unknown
We have no yet crafted directions in desolate places because no one visits but I do
I need adventure to grow
And I am growing