So many thoughts feelings expressions emotions
locked behind deadpan eyes and a voice that's toneless.
A mountain of a person consolidated to this form.
A body unimpressive.
A face unexpressive.
The chaos upstairs requires all of my attention.

Conversing takes a back-seat which is why I seem distant.
Too many things to say only leaves me in silence.
I don't know how or where to begin.
If only I could let you inside to weather the storm
maybe you could make sense of this nonsense and bring me to port.

Behind in my chores
Behind in my reading
Behind in my studies
My heart's bleeding

Lazy days and lazy nights
I just sleep, turn out the lights

Got to get busy! I've had enough!
I've had it hard, life's been rough
But the tough get going
When the going gets tough!

I've put life upon the shelf
Been feeling sorry for myself

Been in a web, severely caught
Sitting on the pity ***
I must give other folks more thought

I've been asleep, but on I plod
I must be closer to my God

Got to put on my eyeglass shoes
I've got the ain't been reading blues!

frozen in emotion, the girl sits and stares.
her ears are ringing with the hum of his name.
her hands aren't shaking, she is motionless.
the girl is quiet & calm as she stares into his eyes;
she is taking in every line, freckle and element of his face.
everything moves in slow motion as her heart softly flutters.

the buddhists speak of soul-mates, they say if find yours; you will be serene.
no uneasiness.
no anxiety.
no apprehension.

just the tranquil river of love smoothly flowing through your veins
and the quiet, alternating heartbeats that beat with veracity.

"Please don't"
You cry as the blood spills
That knife in your throat
Feels worse than the pills

The ones you took
For all those years
Will never suppress
The flow of tears

"Don't cry"
His whisper blocks the light
Senses weakening
But the words still bite

Sight a blur
But you can still see his face
Stained in your memory
Death turns to a race

His smile widens
With your last gasp
He leans in close with a
"You're not the last."

when solar winds
cause a freeze
and ships have doldrums
due to breeze

when roses wilt
because of dew
and broken clocks
are always true

when soldiers all
return from war
and vow that they
will fight no more

when the Jokers'
call the bluff
and the greedy
have enough

when redwoods fall
without a sound
and the canyons
regain ground

when all these things
are proven true
then i will stop

LOVING YOU


SoulSurvivor
(C) 1/2/2016