There is a girl who goes here
who looks just like you
i'm so sorry i didn't come to watch you go
are you now back to watch me through school?
oh hecate, have mercy upon me
and shield me from this bewitchment!
or at least lend her kindness
like she had in this last life
i was too weak to go!
and you too kind to deserve me!
oh please, forgive me
i'm begging you
forgive me
forgive me
forgive me

how much longer
until i am just the indentations
of a body
in my bed?

I feel like,
By the time I'm finished preparing for my future
I'll be too old to remember
The things I enjoy.

here i am to argue
that you can put your arms around a memory
and kiss them till you fall asleep
you can put your arms around a memory
but you'll just be ******* a ghost
and when you're finished
you'll be much colder than you were before

10:20 AM**
utensil song
repeats a sleepy dirge
like i repeat another day
of walking in a circle

i knew you would forget my name
if i didn't write it for you every day
for you to see.
so i found the bridge your car whizzes under
every day to work
and sprayed it in blue
with toadstools and fireworks
pretty girls and tampons
was it enough to wipe the yellow from your mind?

i knew you would forget my name
if i didn't write it down every day
for you to see.
so i shimmied up the sky and hung a banner
of azure eyes and white, white teeth
and waited.
but next week i saw it
floating down the river
with two empty cans of chewing tobacco
and a lemonade carton.

i knew you would forget my name
if i didn't write it
big enough
so i held my breath
with my head on the tracks
and waited for the rumbling to stop

by chance i relived that scene
in the cosmic cloister where i'm still waiting
saw that my head was smeared for a mile
trying to spell out
Hello!
but the trail was an unripe cantaloupe

i turned away
and wept