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Courtney Apr 2014
day,
sun warms my body
laughter fills my mouth
to paint the picture of
happiness

night,
shadows creep closer
music fills my ears
i try to drown my thoughts of
uselessness

which me is alive?
Courtney Jan 2015
there is no use talking about it. no one knows the cause of these tragedies, and pointing fingers will do nothing but hurt the community even further. it saddens me to hear those who can't possibly understand generalize and make assumptions because they have no idea how tough it is.

no idea.

don't tell me you understand how he felt, because you as well are stressed, and so that automatically puts you in the same situation. you are wrong. stress is a problem, but it is not the problem. i am finding flaws with the solution that has been proposed. sure, it is a great solution that will make all of our lives much easier. but it doesn't address the main cause of these horrible events. and the fact that no one sees this is what really makes me sad.

and it makes me even sadder that this has become normal.
Courtney Jul 2014
Spend all this time picking the parts of you
that seem important.

Making yourself into the perfect package
that everyone should want.

Losing yourself in the competition and
acceptance is the prize.
Courtney Jan 2015
i had a good day yesterday.
i finally felt happy,
i felt that maybe i should stay.

i had a good day yesterday.
i shared laughs with my friends,
i saw some color; everything wasn't so gray.

i had a good day yesterday.
i had some free time,
i discovered new music to play.

i had a good day yesterday.
but it took a 180 degree turn for the worst,
i found i am no where close to okay.
Courtney Jul 2014
She looks all around her,
captivated by bursts of color
of every size,
shape,
wishing she was one of them.

For people find
beauty
in flowers,
and that's all she wants.
Courtney Jul 2014
I want to move to
a big city
who's lights provide guidance,
who's places provide endless opportunities,
and who's people allow invisibility.
Courtney Jan 2015
i am a storm.

i wreck everything around me.

it's safe to say i wreak havoc,

for that is all i've known how to do.
Courtney Jan 2015
trying to turn your life around
is a lot harder than you'd think.

constant reminders of your failures,
it seems i just can't get away.

i know what's best for me, i really do.
but somehow i don't deserve it at all.
Courtney Dec 2014
the skin on her wrists was like paper

and their words sharpened the knife.
Courtney Apr 2014
words.
whispered through cracked lips
to break the sound
of tears drip drip dripping down

words.
shouted amidst the hum
to differentiate
from the life living around you

words.
evenly and thoughtfully strung together
to cover up everything
that eats you alive at night

words
overused
useless
words

— The End —