I saw you one day and never thought a thing
As we grew 3 years, I noticed
My heart decided to thump faster
I smiled shyly at you and you smiled back
So I asked you a question, over a note
You broke my heart...You won't ever know
I cried when you left, clutching your answer in my arms
Sobbing for days, broken inside
Last day of school, you gave me a hug

High school began and I saw you again
My heart betrayed me, no matter how much I trained it not to
You smiled at me, and I grimaced back
I wanted to hate you, and I let you know
You talked to me, asking why?
I can't tell you, I might cry
I keep a straight face, a bravado to cover my feelings
Yet somehow, I wish you could see a ***** through my armor

I have a class with you
I stare at you, hoping you stare back
When you do, I sneer at you and glare
I confuse myself
I have feelings

i am an avid non believer in many things
but sweetheart, i believe wholeheartedly
that your mind works in the most mysterious of ways,
that your body's framework is built on nothing but constellations,
that your eyes encompass thunderstorms and
that if you bled, you would bleed golden galaxies.
do not get me wrong, i remain a non believer
in happy endings and romance and love that lasts
but oh my god, even the shortest presence of your gasoline-being
could set a wildfire alight inside of me.

bury me into the ground.
i am lost, i cannot be found.
but if you happen to find me,
please return me to where i belong;
at the bottom of the deep blue sea.
i am
drowning
in
the
ocean
but
it's
not
the
water
that's
suffocating
me.
my emotions, so strong they're strangling me.
my thoughts, they terrify me.
i would rather live on my knees than die on my feet.
tie me to your car and drag me through the street.
make my skin bleed, tear my thighs.
this doesn't hurt at all, i feel sky high.
to destroy my emotions is to exploit my pain.
this is my release, i am not insane.
i am not insane.
i am not insane.
i am not insane.
i
am
not
insane
i
am
nothing
at
all.
     bury me anywhere
i dont care i dont care i dont care

i dont exist
i am not even imaginary
please dont insist
that i am extraordinary

just leave me alone
with my ocean;
my home.
let the liquid fill my lungs
as i float
float
float
i am weightless;
i am nothing.
never was something.
never want to be.
i am always drowning in the deep blue sea.

I love the tunes of sad melodies...
The meaning of gloomy lyrics...

They bring me back to a place...
That I call home.

The kind of home that lives in me.

For not all will understand.
And not all has the knowledge...

That this is the true side of me.
That no one will ever know...