******* reminds me I have soul
perhaps you find the subject rather droll
relief and release is the hedonist key
seeking one's own pleasure will set you free,
opening that box of supreme delights
takes me to such lofty heights
again and again I seek its embrace
an immortal drug the adrenaline race
please do not sit and condemn me with woe
when release from this pain simply makes it so.

I have seen the bliss
before the morning's dawn .
I have taken kiss from a woman
as she slept like a new born fawn .
I have seen the sun and moon set
together in a western sky .
I have seen all the reasons now
as we let our loving die .

I have seen the fog at times when
there was nothing one could see .
I have seen eternity from the mountains
all the way down to the sea .
I have seen love's kind embrace and
felt it's breath upon my skin .
But I don't even dare to dream
there will be another like you again .

Oh , I have seen paradise through
The yellow of the glass .
Tasted it upon my tongue
And it was so very nice .
I have smelled the rose's fumes
And it permanates the air
For evermore I assumed
But now face cold realities stare

I have seen the petals fall
one by one by one
I have seen the fingers slip away
until there were none .
I have this empty feeling
at the bottom of my pit
God it is so unwilling
I think I'm feeling sick

Our love has evaporated
After summer's rain  
Leaving steaming memories
Heat and searing pain
But I have not seen
Nor think I ever will
See a love again like this
Forever that's so real

“Can you state your emergency?”
“There’s been a lung collision.”

He’s stealing your breath, darling I can’t feel your lungs
What an aberration, forced to bleed the river of an emotion
You were never taught to feel growing up
I think nobody told you how to feel a colour so hard
Crimson on your neck, on your chest
But I cannot find a wound
Your breath feels like knives
But it’s funny, you’re dying

You’re trying to tell me something
It sounds like the kind of thing you would say right at sunset
Slurring your sevens like you have mints on your tongue
But you are only gasping for air

Marble gazes
Your eyes are lolling back
They are the same eyes that have cut through me
The same eyes I’ve always thought were beautiful
When you were sad

You are weak and you are failing
Completely unlike the times
You would walk in like a sandstorm
No less powerful than a serpent
Beautiful

Now you are trying to speak
“Feels like a fishbone dislodged in my lungs”
And you laugh
You are laughing and you are dying
And this night still feels like day

I tried scraping out the difference
Between guilt and self-loathe
But the answer only lies on the blade of this knife
Maybe I could tell you I don’t know what I did with it
The reason we are not sure from which wound
This blood is seeping from

It wasn't just a lung collision
It was the explosion of a galaxy in your chest
When your ribs bent and cracked
Now they are broken, dust
You are breathing in rust
But it does not matter because you are dying

In the distance there is the sound of sirens
They are coming and they might be far too late.

Here's what I've been saving,
here's just a little taste.
I've wanted to say it,
so here it goes; I like your face.

I don't just mean "your face",
'cause I like the other parts too!
Together, I find them much better,
because together they make you.

And let's face it,
I like you more with eyes and ears and toes.
But what I love, perhaps most of all
is the tip of your stout little nose.

Now don't get me wrong,
I'd love you even with no bells or whistles.
Yet when you look at me with those eyes,
you make my heart race; blood sizzle.

I don't think I've gotten across
quite what I've wanted to say.
But maybe it just wasn't meant to be,
maybe it's for another day.

With all of the grand adventure awaiting you,
I wish you could just pack me up in your suitcase too.
That way, wherever you go,
You'd have me and I'd have you.

Experience is a funny thing,
Most times in a way that doesn't
Make you laugh.*

I've put on my mask before,
Many times over the years.
You can't help but be upset,
So let me see the tears.

If your words say you're fine,
Then why don't your eyes say the same?
Don't lie to me, I invented that look
But you're not the one to blame.

Don't tell yourself you're ok
When you know that's not the truth.
You think you're fooling everyone when
All you fool is you.

It's not "being strong" that makes it better,
Whatever that even means.
It's by accepting you're upset and hurt;
That you're just a human being.

You *want love? You are loved.
An open heart? Into mine you can pour.
I'd rather see my heart get destroyed than
You hopelessly giving up yours.

Feel your feelings,
Let those demons out.
'Cause when they're locked up
They too scream and shout.

You're beautiful when you cry,
As with everything you do.
When beads of tears roll down your face
I see the beautiful in you.

And I'm in love with you all the time
with the words that you say and
the love in your mouth
the way your tongue feels as it rolls over my eyeballs,
the name of your first dog you couldn't tell me.
your legs as tall as buildings
they crush cars
and they crush me
underneath,
with my teeth sunk into your shoulders
yours wrists turning
and your bones cracking
lovey baby lovey baby
are you slurring your way home again?
Just in time to stop traffic,
thighs trembling,
I've buried all your clothes in my backyard again.

how stupid i have been to think "i love you"
means "i won't **** someone behind your back
and pretend
i'm the righteous one"

If I could only sit still, I would write a million words about us, about you, about me at the bottom with my hands on that rock.
Scratching my fingernails against it so that I could go home and complain to you about how much my tiny hands hurt, and how I could not hold them in yours.
If I could hold my train of thought, I would type out a memoir about you and me and the time we decided to make love in a parking garage elevator late at night, my back against the glass. And who might’ve seen us while they walked home.
Their names and their faces, all those people that aren’t us. I would write about how when those doors opened, the world outside had changed and so had we.
If I could keep my fingers steady, I would dial your number on my telephone. I would cry your name into the speaker, and I would wait patiently for you to take me back.
I would be on hold forever.