my ink was too bleak to write.
my soul was too tired to fight.
thoughts commixed with my sense.
too shattered to take a stance.
screaming  voice couldn't be heard.
a lone trip down the road.
fight with the one that consumed.
the reasons that amused.
it was all me, me in a war.
all that remained was A Beautiful Scar*.

Whole world seemed so filled with you in it.
But the moment you left, it had an unfulfilled void in it .
You were there in that room talking to me , all animated and
next inanimation followed up .
When you left us , you took the pleasure of being in your company.
With your death what came upon me was all Ataraxia .

Let us hold the hands
and
walk in the pouring rains...
Let us make it drip down
all our pains..
Let us close our eyes
and
get lost in this moment...
  Let us secure the opportunity
to be happy
and
sing together a Sonnet...
Let us **** our reasons
and
bounds and cares to stay..
Far from populous ,
let us hold hands
and
get far , far away* ..

"Not every man with a heart
is understanding.
Not every man with ears
is a listener.
Not every man  with eyes
is able to see. "

May be the demons we carry
with us now
are nothing compared to what waits

they look at me
and see me
as I am deprived from
the love of God.
And I envision
God in
everything

If we  peek into our souls,
We'd find broken lovers feeding despair to opportunities.
Hidden under the mask of compassion is our selfish nature.
We think we are either trying to heal our souls or cure the souls of those we love .
©asim.javid

a broken bridge
connected their hearts.
a silent conversation
between their minds.
an inconsolable affinity
between their souls.
They struggled to
come over distances.
But the distances never
existed ******,
They had consumed their
Spirits*...

Having hardships in life is somewhat
we all have to face .
No matter how positive we foresee our lives ,
struggle towards serenity is never effortless.
We all are embedded in deadlocks of life.
Without ENDURANCE & TOLERANCE
we will collapse in gyration of  dilemma.

An interminable yearning of
solace finding.
A constant struggle of cicatrix hiding.
Euphoric trance,  we hanker it all.
To breath beyond the limits of wall.
Wall that curbs our accord.
To hum the songs from one old record.
To aviate beyond the visible horizon.
To be souls of mirthful composition.
Exempting our cores of concealed  desires.
To sway  with adored one in bonfires.
To see the world engrossed in
love and peace.
Will only,  then our souls
ensconce in ease*...

She was a picture of monotonous monochrome.
She was deathly quite in one jaunty home.
She lied in wait of eyes that could see through her bleakness.
One who could see the beauty in her , beyond her illusory mess.
People gazed at her and noticed the lack of chroma.
Then a man , destitute of vision , approached and followed her aroma.
He gazed at her with the touch of his finger.
And time stopped as he started to linger.
His gaze took him , in the depths of her beauty.
And she spilled colors and made him sooty.
With no vision he espied her coloration.
and world was hysterical
at their love in
such
excommunication*.

Expression is important.  
There are times when you want to scream your heart out and paint the walls with what's building inside your brain. 
 The aggressive, blunt and killer feelings just reside inside and somehow you want to spill them out.
Surrounded by suffocating truths , lies and millions of mixed emotions , humans tend to collapse.
Expressing ,not only in darkest of emotions but also in the most colorful of moments , is essential.
To disencumber the heart from feelings and emotions that sink it , we express.
Way outs can be simple and they can be labyrinthine.
Screams , music,words, art and what not. Our world is surrounded by these expressions.
Every thing that touches us and relates to us, is someone's expression .
Expressions give rise to heartening forms of art and mystics of world. We are surrounded by such things , that way we are part of everyone's life. That's how we are all connected.
Is it not curious, how world so big seems so familiar when we are introduced and when we understand the hidden meanings of it?
I believe , this whole world is just
an expression of God's mind.*

©asim.javid

My  Grandma
A woman of extreme strength, courage and love,
Who was beautiful, soft and now peaceful and free as a dove.
Someone on who our admiration was built around,
For her womanhood, wife, friend and grandmother since she was brought into this ground.
We have truly learned the most from,
Your strength. We will always respect all you went through in your hardships and distinguished ways,
Your ability to hold yourself with such dignity and pride in all your days,
Your beauty shines in us all who were lucky to be part of your devoted family,
We will carry you in our eyes, minds, and hearts and hold you close by all you have taught us to do,
And to remember the beautiful women we owe our lives to,
For giving us life ,to blessing us with her strong inner spirit of courage,
and her unconditional love.
For being such a person in who will always and have always
held deep in our hearts now and here after.
Grandma, You are taking a little part of us with you and left a void that no one can ever fill   and now  you will follow your angels who will guide you to your precious place.
May you look down on us with pride on what you brought
into this world with your guidance in which you are now
truly our angel of grace.
My Darling Grandma, as you enter your new heavenly home,
may you rest in peace for which you truly deserve,
For you will be truly missed and remembered for your love and honor in which we will preserve.
We love you always and forever and may God be with you and may all your sins be forgiven.
Amen

He remained silent and his silence spoke.
Without words,  the story bespoke.
There was a fight in his breath , a soul of a fighter.
Another strain and his fist got tighter.
Facing the enemy ,living with in.
Morbid and morbid , beating the sin.
Times & times, he was dead.
Again & again , he rose from the very death bed.
Carved the hope from with in despair.
Beating the strain and no spare.
He is the human fighting for bread.
He is alive but living among dead.
He shares the same world where vanity live .
He has no food , which is care to few.
He is the fighter , fighting for life.
To be a human or a fighter, that's his strife*.

Perhaps the greatest faculty our minds possess is the ability to cope with pain. Classic thinking teaches us of the four doors of the mind, which everyone moves through according to their need.
First is the door of sleep. Sleep offers us a retreat from the world and all its pain. Sleep marks passing time, giving us distance from the things that have hurt us. When a person is wounded they will often fall unconscious. Similarly, someone who hears traumatic news will often swoon or faint. This is the mind’s way of protecting itself from pain by stepping through the first door.

Second is the door of forgetting. Some wounds are too deep to heal, or too deep to heal quickly. In addition, many memories are simply painful, and there is no healing to be done. The saying ‘time heals all wounds’ is false. Time heals most wounds. The rest are hidden behind this door.

Third is the door of madness. There are times when the mind is dealt such a blow it hides itself in insanity. While this may not seem beneficial, it is. There are times when reality is nothing but pain, and to escape that pain the mind must leave reality behind.

Last is the door of death. The final resort. Nothing can hurt us after we are dead, or so we have been told.”

" she shed her emotions like four seasons. . .
the gloom in her eyes carried certain reasons. . .
from all the nights she sparkled brightest in the moon less one. . .
and then she faded into the sky like a dying sun. . .
striving through the excruciating weathers that soaked her dry. . .
with all that ache and not a tear to cry. . .
was it her strength that held her high. . .
or was it the despair when hopes were a lie... "*
-asim.javid

Frozen for the colors to smash canvas,
frozen for the poetry to touch my speech,
frozen for the nature that my fingers can't reach,
frozen for the emotions and actions i should execute,
i am frozen for the dreams, that should happen,
there are million other desires, for which, i am still frozen, so are you.

Growing Old is so disheartening
filled with too much stress, perplexity and charade.
Getting older made me to envision the malice in society
and the world we live in, which is
full of rapacious and self-centered human beings,
lack of compassion and division of people
on the grounds of ethnicity,
economic inequalities .
I have realized that childhood is the prime phase of life,
where worries were the least ,
and i was  ignorant from the cruel facts of life.
I wish i was just a child and had not been
exposed to cruel facts of life.

she was a marionette of the echoes
of her past
corrupting her present.
She was fluctuating betwixt
the anguish of the antecedent and
invariable  sanctity.
She was apostle of the present
but
She worshipped her past

She was effigy of chaos,  conflicts and messed stories.
Her heart was broken but it radiated beauties.
The dark in her was a mass of stunning surprises. She'd  smile and smile passed the peace.
In her arms,  tranquillity lied & in her arms my disturbed mind would ease.
With an undefined gravity she pulled me close.
Close and close,  she became someone I'd never lose*.

Have anthologized every
cerebration of mine,
finding myself snared in
dogmatic mysteries of cosmos.
My cognitive contents are
razing & vitiating,
leaving a brobdingnagian lacuna.
Striving to surmount it but,  
incapable of sating  the one that
domiciliates within
my èlan vital.

For the years we stayed together,
For the ages we live with each other..
You are a friend,  sister and a mother,
Love for you is upto infinity and further..
Your will be introduced  to new life,
as you are going to be someone's wife..
Happiness and blessings is what
i wish for you,
you are moving out and the time is due..
Stay happy,  stay blessed and
never get troubles,
You holded my hand in all the rubble..
May you be get life of the  stellar,
Love you and that's eternal*...

I died as a mineral and became a plant,
I died as plant and rose to animal,
I died as animal and I was Man.
Why should I fear? When was I less by dying?
Yet once more I shall die as Man, to soar
With angels blest; but even from angelhood
I must pass on: all except God doth perish.
When I have sacrificed my angel-soul,
I shall become what no mind ever conceived.

At the silhouette of dawn
she pointed her finger
towards the sun and
whispered good morning to me,
When i wanted to stay in the night
and gaze into her eyes
and envision the moon...

You are a part angel and part teacher.

  You are my first school and first institution.

You taught me right and you made me aware of wrong.

You held me close and you taught me how to be strong.

I'm  forever indebted under your grace.

A mother like you is blessing to the human race.

You have been with me in the happy sunny days and in
the troublesome  weather.

I'm proud to be your son and call you my mother* .

“A cruel carelessness grows within me;
a violent indifference, an emptiness that I cannot escape.
And it’s terrible, it’s terrifying not being able to resist falling into this emotionless state.”

A nebulous hope on the silhouette of horizon.
My redeeming font , one sweet poison.
Slowly it obliterated  me ,
branding with ache of reaching.
The ashes of my nous shouting and screeching.
Left with repugnant psyche of an undying hype.
Resplendent hysteria of an antithetic type.
Is it the verity or  nebulous dream.
Is it the silence or vociferous scream.
The part of me desists.
The part of me resists.
To walk the path that leads to decay.
Holding the faith with doubts at bay.
What do I do , to overcome this interlace.
May be I spiflicate the existence , and
   live as Inanimate* .

A radiating art poured down her fingertips.
i lost the decency of my mind with just one glance of her lips.
i wanted to succumb into her like the paint on her art.
her beauty was so painful that it pierced my heart.
she was close a breath and as far as God.
I lied next to her longing to talk ,
but all we
exchanged was the silence,
wondering if that was odd* !

Once upon a time, son,
they used to laugh with their hearts
and laugh with their eyes:
but now they only laugh with their teeth,
while their ice-block-cold eyes
search behind my shadow.

There was a time indeed
they used to shake hands with their hearts:
but that’s gone, son.
Now they shake hands without hearts
while their left hands search
my empty pockets.

‘Feel at home!’ ‘Come again’:
they say, and when I come
again and feel
at home, once, twice,
there will be no thrice-
for then I find doors shut on me.

So I have learned many things, son.
I have learned to wear many faces
like dresses – homeface,
officeface, streetface, hostface,
cocktailface, with all their conforming smiles
like a fixed portrait smile.

And I have learned too
to laugh with only my teeth
and shake hands without my heart.
I have also learned to say,’Goodbye’,
when I mean ‘Good-riddance’:
to say ‘Glad to meet you’,
without being glad; and to say ‘It’s been
nice talking to you’, after being bored.

But believe me, son.
I want to be what I used to be
when I was like you. I want
to unlearn all these muting things.
Most of all, I want to relearn
how to laugh, for my laugh in the mirror
shows only my teeth like a snake’s bare fangs!

So show me, son,
how to laugh; show me how
I used to laugh and smile
once upon a time when I was like you.

The dot of dark hate in the rose of.         love..
The despair seeded in the core of hope..
Peace lying in the beloved arms of disruption..
the blood of demom running dormant in the veins of God..
We all stand on the burning grass of hell which is beautifully decorated in the Gardens Of Parsdise...
Are we all so inebriatedly lost in this paradise or
this paradise is so lost to us*....
©Asim Javid

It is difficult to be patient,
but
to waste the reward of patience
is worse

Patterns of the past follow you like fire blazed,
Ever wondered if they will still find your scars and be amazed?
Changing yourself wouldn't undo the mistakes,
For in this life you will get one time takes.
The soul is always hungry for something wild,
But because of the undenying deeds, the heart turns mellow and mild,
It is afraid of someone looking at her naked face,
Ashamed & embarrassed still holding up with the world's pace.
Maybe in the end we all have to find our kind of people,
Just as shady, wild, bound by the demons of a great keeper,
No matter how much you run, your feet is already set on fire,
Are you gonna choose between pure love or the well-aged desire.
No matter how much escape & how  much you run.
Everything settles,  even the shimmering sun.
Look at you & look around, you think suffering is just in you and you are the only one?
Pain & sorrows lies in every soul and that spared none.
The unsettling desires , the relentless pursuing of dreams.
All hide under the reality when it screams.
The despair and powerlessness take over the soul.
Plant your feet and fight for your goal.
Past is a demon , past is cruel and the past, it sure teaches.
The wild experience and inexplicable lessons it preaches.
It beholds immense complexities and innumerable lessons , for past is the creator of future and past is a dauntless teacher*.

The definition of beauty is surrounded to one's perception.
Lose the perception, every flaw is a beauty.
&
Lose the definition, everything & everyone becomes beautiful*

# asim.javid

The idea is to change the world
into a place
where every individual
is capable of living their lives independently ,
& without fear of the system
and
there is peace and brotherhood
among every ******* sect of the world without discrimination or injustice.
The idea of beauty vs ugly,
rich vs poor,
powerful vs the weak
& every attribute that
makes men to discriminate
each other, should be
******* diluted.
That is the world,
I want for every ****
generation to come

you presented yourself
like an open book to me,
shedding all your celibacy.
you vitiated me with the
idea of cognizing you.
I am beyond the hope
of quenching my soul.
  The more I know you, 
 the more I crave for you.
You are a book,  
and I am reading you
between and beyond
the lines

In the deep world of my thoughts.
I think of you by my side.
In the realms of reality,
we are separated by a see full of tide.

How can the distance merge,
and we, together, have a life.
Time to spend,  moments to live,
no more distances to appear alive.

May be we are meant to be abstract,
the intangible form of love.
May be,  we are the ghosts,
ghosts for each other,  always hidden
behind the tangible love.

Is fate to blame?
Or should we blame the God?
So perfect and yet distant,  isn't that odd?
We can cry for a why
or just accept the design.
We could strive against the gap,
and love each other
till we die*.

Day after day you wipe humans away.
Don't you see in that crowd,  there is
a mother , a father,
a daughter and a son.
What do you want to prove with
your hand holding a gun.
Is is just ? Is it fair ?
You are not a human, not even near.
No matter what you call yourself,
  you belong to no religion.
You are not a father , not a brother,
not even mother's son.
You smear your religion ,
you smear humanity.
Your actions are no more than
a plaguey insanity.
Where are your morals, where is
your human code?
You betray the mother earth , which is your abode.
You inflict anguish,
You scourge families.
We detest you and have branded you
" a Terrorist ".
No matter how much you terrorize,
we humans will always find sheer
strength to resist.
     © asim.javid

She has annulled the ideas of lugubriousness and sorrow.

She is like a spirited rhapsody with no care for tomorrow.
She is effulgent like a shimmery ethereal.
I see her as an elysian effigy.
Wondering how real can she be ?
Is there nothing broken inside ? Is there nothing that aches ?
May be She is mystery,  not to be solved.
All I can see is that there are strange strings involved.
With her I am falling in these inscrutable ties.
And She is more than what meets my eyes....

                                                 © asim.javid

A strange passion is moving
in my head. My heart
has become a bird, which
searches in the sky. Every
part of me goes in the different
directions. Is it really so
that the one I love is
everywhere

“The breezes at dawn have secrets to tell you
Don't go back to sleep!
You must ask for what you really want.
Don't go back to sleep!
People are going back and forth
across the doorsill where the two worlds touch,
The door is round and open
Don't go back to sleep!”

Put me in the chamber
with just shame to inhale.
I will extinguish ,
flaming out the demons.
For then my soul will purify
and
i will b freed.

"There is a certain placidity in my seclusion .
The feeling of affection seems like an obtrusion.
Here is peace , but out there whole world is prying.
Probing us for flaws and they never stop trying.
Testing us with abstracts like love & what-not.
As the chains of spurious amity tighten the ****** knot.
I am amidst the society, yet I am sequestered.
And the resentment has become more festered.
I have  no enmity for the world out there.
In lieu of perfidious world , I prefer to be here.
That fabricated affinity I just elude.
So, I always hanker for tranquility of my personal solitude ."*

-asim.javid

you try to search
beauty in complexities
of nature....
when it takes a
SPECK OF DUST
to beautify you
for eternity

Our withered souls are like
dying sunsets,
hoping to never die.
But only after death,
the sun rises again*


#asim.javid

I am the quarry of my benighted psyche.
So crumbled by the fiendish enactments.
I dread the very persona
i've impersonated.
The damaging mentation have
inebriated my nous.
Clambering  off from this lineament
is my quotidian.
I wish to be devoid from this self.
As it ingests my soul.

Tonight the moon  isn't beautiful anyhow.
Tonight the dark has stolen the show.
The bright light is just demorphing the infinite  dark.
Tonight the light is just one ugly mark.
The dark holds the peace in it .
and the light is full of discord.
Darkness holds the beauty tonight.
It is defeating the light without any fight* .

I am no more dirigible, no more bound.
I am the hawk,  I am the hound.
I am  beyond anyone's touch.
My ideas go beyond the stretch.
I savvied the rules of world -a pitfall.
Now i aspire to break them all.
Now i wander,  with no guilt to ponder.
My soul is sated with peace, that's what i will squander.
The temporal rules i bend with ease.
Cuz i am sceptred with
THE DREAMER'S DISEASE*.

I woke up this morning and my name flashed on T.V.
They said i blew up places , they said i killed masses .
Men , women & children I murdered them all.
Who am I ?
I am a muslim and i am taking this fall.
They used my name and spread the terror.
I am not them , it surely is an error.
We, muslims, are the holders of peace , we spread love.
Why am I being  represented by their false actions.
I am a person, with different notions.
World will now brand me a terrorist.
Don't judge me by their actions , I insist.
I am not them, they pilfered my name.
They inflicted libel , and my religion to defame .
I have been robbed , robbed of my name.
I am a muslim , human like you , all the same.
My name has been robbed , my identity stolen
I deprecate the terror and mourn for fallen.
There are millions like me and humanity lies in our depths.
But we are all victims of Identity Theft* ...............

memories,  sentiments,  anguishes, exultations,
You dissolve them all...
Unceasing aeonian amorphous flow
you are,
You efface every life once for all..
Kings and Queens crumpled before you,
You stand grandiloquent and tall..
You took beloved ones,  some ended in flames and some in clays,
You left us with a void in heart,
and dragged us into a pitfall..
You become a friend and a foe,
an opportunity takes it all..
No one surmounted you,  none master did,
You mastered them all..
You are the Time, The Invincible Time,
That is what we all waul* ...