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STOP... there is no use in thinking like that
STOP... put the razor down
STOP... don't cry at your desk, it isn't worth it
STOP... tell them the truth
STOP... don't tell the girl all of your secrets
STOP... don't ask her to come in with you
God, if only i could have carried a
Sign around with me.
If only i would have listened to my consious,
constantly telling me to
and rething what i was doing.
and put myself first
and think of what i'd be thinking now.
If i could tell myself back then what i know now,
I would say, those thoughts are not true
the lines you create will forever be regretted
the kids at school don't care if they upset you, don't show them your tears
Tell them the truth, because so much would be different today if you do
The girl who knows everything about you, will use it against you later
and making the mistake of letting her in with you will run through your mind every day
but mostof all, keep going
don't STOP life just because you are sad.
Don't STOP dreaming
Don't STOP fighting
and most of all
don't STOP breathing
I tend to get stares... Looks... The occasional "are you gay?" With a quizzical look of disgust.
Well, to answer your question, no, I am not gay.
In a society built around judgment and stilted above common sense,
Being gay would mean that I'd have to find women utterly disgusting, flick my wrists, speak with funny and awkward inflections, right?
Do you think I speak with funny and awkward inflections?
Good! Because I'm so not gay.
Being gay would mean that I love to shop, well I hate it!
My fashion sense does not exceed that of a box of colorful crayola crayons melting away in the blistering Las Vegas sun because you see, I don't live in San Francisco, or New York,
or anywhere "gay" people live.
I am not gay.
Being gay would mean that I am immoral but I can assure you, moralistically speaking, that morals are what keep me routinely from listening to Lady Gaga, who I've heard, despite her catholic upbringing, is a devout devil worshiper and I sure as hell don't worship Satan!
Oh no, I am not gay.
My father once told me, in his manliest tone that if I ever became sweet
or my tank profusely filled with sugar
that he'd disown me and rid me of his home.
However last time I checked,
I don't have a tank
and one lick of my tanned brown skin would reveal that I am in fact quite salty!
Salty, as defined by Urban Dictionary, means to be ******.
Bitter. Angry.
Well father, there aint nothing sweet about my wrath.
I'm infuriated.
I'm angry not because I'm not able to fulfill the holistic criterion society has built in order to be gay,
No, I am more upset that there is actually a set of rules dictating whether or not someone is gay.
Now listen to me when I tell you,
I am not gay
I am not gay because I have yet to inject myself of substances with an unsterile needle for all purposes of getting high.
No, I have yet to discover my last ****** partner was diagnosed with *** and that I may very well have the virus.
No, I have yet to interiorly decorate my bedroom with the warm crimson fluid that is my blood because some punk at school thought it was cute to label me a queer.
I have yet to be gay because being gay in today's society means I am reckless. I am promiscuous. I am a *******.
Well, guess what society,
I am not gay.
I am, in fact, a man, who is not your personal show dog for your fashion approval that you can tote around in some cute Gucci bag.
I am a man, who can still appreciate the beautiful magnificence that is a curve when he sees one no matter the person's gender.
I am a man who, despite what you may be expecting,
is a man who, no matter how hard you try to box me in a confined image,
is a man who, will fight to freely be in love with who he wants to be in love with,
who is a man who is not gay
but a man who loves men.
I am not gay.
Totally gay.
When you think you love someone, take a step back. When all you can see is the way they have shaped you into what they've wanted, just like your parents have all these years, walk away
2. When they tell you that you can't do it, look at them and prove you can.
3.when everything inside of you is screaming to just jump the bridge... Don't. Because tomorrow won't be there if you do and I promise, tomorrow will miss you. And tomorrow has a new adventure. Be excited
4. When you see that girl across the table, and she scares you. Kiss her. Kiss her hard because you scare her too, but somehow it'll work.
5. When one day you wake up and food is no longer your best friend, when you can't stand the smell of your favorite meal, eat it anyway. Because when I stepped on the scale and saw I've lost 10 pounds in a week, I realized there was something wrong.
6. When you can't be yourself somewhere, leave.

So that's what I'm doing.
Because of you
I’m not lost
Because of you
I have hope
Because of you
I’m not afraid to look in mirror
Because of you
I’m not afraid to hurt
Because of you
The scars on my legs don’t scare me anymore
Because of you
I don’t make scars on my legs
Because of you
I can feel my future
Because of you
I don’t feel sick
Because of you
I don’t eat too much
Because of you
I don’t have holes in my heart
Because of you
I want to have a family
Because of you
I realized that love is real
And it doesn’t always have to feel one sided
Because of you
I don’t cry myself to sleep
Because of you
I don’t feel alone
Because of you
I believe in God
Because of you
I don’t feel like He hates me
Because of you
And your family
I know what family feels like
Because of you
I don’t fight stupid battles in my head
Instead, I let them out knowing I win
Because of you
I’m free
From the bricks that once kept me from moving
Because of you
I can dream
Because of you
I can love myself
Because of you
I don’t want to die

If it weren’t for you
I might not be here
If it weren’t for you
I’d probably have given up
If it weren’t for you
I know I would have given up
Thank you.
"I love you," she said

with her hand in her lap

as she looked up at her mother

whose hand began to tap

"I love you," she repeated

staring at her mom

just praying she'd say it back

but silence is what did come.

"I love you," she screamed

and she looked up with fear

the woman got up

and left her alone here

"I love you," she sobbed

but her mom didn't care

she left her there, helpless

without a single care

"I still love you," she sobbed


but I guess my mother can't love

the actual me."
For my mother
I close my eyes
And lick my lips
As Full hands
Turn into finger tips
They go down my side
Then over my thighs
The hands begin to undo
The laces on my shoe
Then the buttons on my pants
Maybe this is what they call romance
The hands know what's next
And what'll feel best
As they slip between my legs
The more my body begs
They stroke where it feels right
And my muscles become tight
When I finally I ***
And all of my body is numb
I finally open my eyes
And realize my body has told lies
For I lay in bed alone
With only hands of my own
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