I saw you leaving, I saw the light go out.
Now, My house is haunted by wrong desire,
And on my skin is left the scent of betrayal.

For every one of your depicting lies the truth lay underneath it.
paint me a portrait of how happy we were supposed to be,
An oil paining perhaps of how our forsaken  lives were seen as mellow gold.

A painful affair,
Ghost lover extrordinare,
Our fate was never bound to live forever,
But, with you I would've together.

The stars were up above in your eyes,
Beneath the clouds of an October night,
I saw you on the side walk bleeding,
Sickened by the thought of leaving.

From that dream I awoke to find that you were no longer sleeping by my side,
But my dream had become a reality,
And you had really left me.

My house is haunted by the ghosts of you,
More than one, more than a few.
I sleep in a bed that's too full to move in,
But everyone else sees it as empty.
They don't know how you scarred me,
How your ghosts will always follow me.

Goodbye,
Goodnight,
I won't be sleeping tight.

A letter knocks
Knuckled to drop
Conversations features
Reservations deterred
Words so sincere as they read
“At Todi in Umbria, St Illuminata, ******”

She is the one,
A bearer of light
Holding a spear on one hand
Whilst the torch beams the other
She is the one,
A past patron
Holding a script on one hand
Whilst a caution teams the other
She is the one,
Knowing the stormy seas
In between the islands that separate
She is one,
Now an angel with a message
an illumination from the passage
She is the one
The buried meaning in the rumble
Married to the whispering mumble

St Illuminata, the ******
In **** citing recitals
St Illuminata, the saint
In moon a might accidental
St Illuminata, the ******
In a fresco of expressions
St Illuminata, the saint
A disciplined follower

St Illuminata, St Illuminata
Where is the battle
The conflict that never wins
St Illuminata, St Illuminata
The martyr of their holy causes
A magician of confusion
Rolled in the wind of ails
Spreading a blessing of demise
To get attention of his rise
The exploded land mines
Inside the grieve and heaves
Within the signposted graves
The boats that set only to sink
As the gunshots destroy
The ploy on the forts
All the sides of convictions
Inconvenient progressions
St Illuminata, in a convent

I don't know you
I never will
But a Facebook post told me you got drunk and hit your bike at the freeway
You suffered head injuries and died on the spot.
My Facebook timeline is filled with posts from your friends and family.
They miss you ,they love you and wonder how did you leave so soon.
You were twenty, attending uni and in love with a beautiful girl.
You loved driving your bike on the smooth roads when the rain poured.
You loved drinking till your mind was numb and speech slurred.
I never knew you
But i remember you playing football on our school grounds and talking to the pretty girls.
I remember you posting pictures of you and your girlfriend in the school uniform and everyone commenting on your 'love'
I remember talking to you once about our common last name. I remember you accidentally bumping me in the school hallways.
I remember you standing infront of the principal's office because you played a harmless prank on a teacher.
I remember you standing on stage with trophies and medals you won for our school.
I remember the funny posts you used to share on facebook.
You don't know me. You never will.
I was just another girl in your Facebook friend list. I was just another junior who didn't talk much.

Maybe if I strain my ears,I can hear your mother screaming over the death of her only son. Maybe I can hear your girlfriend crying over her love.
But I hear nothing because in silence,we yearn.

Crawling over broken glass for adoration,
Acceptance and fulfilment
The heart beats fraily
Hemorrhaging with disappointment

The world spoke promises that never came back
Occasionally they echo in mocking reverberation
The D man below eager, drinking and licking
Every drop leaking from my sour cuts

The world is beautiful with its facades
Encouraging young roses bloom beautifully
But then they wither sadly
The sky leaks happy showers occasionally
That dissolve in a sea of sourness

I look out from my pensive window
Streets are washed in acidic struggles
Trees suffocated and emaciated
Someone once cared for them
Now they don't

Sadistic eyes stare at me
As i watch the world from my window
I dare not step out, I retreat to my cocoon
Where it is just me and my faithful alphabets

Unconditionally the love
Faithfully they never let go
I roll and twirl them into a bandage for my wounds
So the horned man below does not **** life out of me

You are the tourist through my wild feelings
You visit intermittently with expectations
Seeking gratification to your longing
You have the best of time then you are departed

We have unrivaled fun when you are here
But before long you are gone and I remain alone
Sharing my blues with my ink and brush
And my happiness with my faithful alphabets

You awe and oh
Confusing scars for beauty spots
Why dont you stay
Face my predators with me

I may paint a mountain of hope
Which you will admire but never climb
I may paint a dispossessed face
But it will never be you

You may imagine yourself in my shoes
But you will never wear them
I may touch your heart
But I may never win it

My wild feelings are the coke
That give you a temporary high you seek
Ours is no strings attached so I wake up alone
Feeling empty after a night of excitement

You like me but you wont stay
I will give you the best time when you visit
And miss you when you are gone
When its just me and my faithful alphabets

Where do they go
Those who vanish from the face of the earth?
Do they find peace?

Can a broken heart be mend there?
Does wretchedness end or stick
Do they find new beginnings?

I can die for a fresh start
But one can never be sure
So I keep having these thoughts...