allie: Favorites

Apr 2017 allie

Błeeding Dįamøndš

Why can’t you look at me as normal?
Why do you see me a freak?
Why don’t you think that my heart can’t break?
Why can’t you understand that I own my own pain?
That I drive myself insane trying to become something new.
But when I say that I hurt, its, “who knew?”
So put me in a cage,
Condemn me for wishing for normality
That wish led to my fatality.
So I am here
With the ones they call odd
The ones you laugh at
The ones you question
Because if I can’t be normal, than no one can
Spend my life wishing to be larger than life
Wishing that people would see me, and not for my appearance.
Because as this is written, I am in pain
At this time I have no hope.
So go and tell me
“No need to mope”
But hell, not even the pope
Could pray the things I need prayer about.
That’s why I fell so far behind
Because I thought there was another path to find
And music was the only way I felt right
The notes where my eyes to see the light.
But you still laugh at me
Because my music is not sung at church
Because I scream
I am labeled a freak.
But if I don’t have talent
Why am I still writing on?
Because one day
You will remember the remraf name
When I claim my fame,
You will burn in the flame of my darkness
Of my shadow
So welcome to the carnival,
Where the lowest of the low find the highest of the high
Because today
Is the day
We rise,
Every “freak” in the world
Rise.
Because a freak is the new normal
And if you don’t agree,
Than you can stand before me
And tell me all my faults,
Tell me my insecurities.
And when you’re all said and done
It’ll be my turn to pay my respects
Because when you looked down at us
You forgot that even you had overseers.
Because what you do
What you say
Is downright *****.
I am angry at your actions
Treating me as a carney boy
I am no freak
I am no freak
I am no freak
Leave me be!
Oh!
Leave this alone
Let me live my life
So what if you don’t like my music
So what that you don’t like my style
So what that you are to ***** to make your own
So what?
So what?

#song

Apr 2017 allie

My Dilemma.

Apr 2017 allie

Alyssa

My Dilemma.

Sometimes I see things I don't always want to see..
Like the times when he has a few drinks too many,
and suddenly he's changed..
The sparkle in his eyes are much different from when he's
maybe just high and sometimes sober,
He goes from gentle to angry in a matter of mixes,
I don't understand,
what he thinks what his tricks is.
I do enjoy the warmth from an occasional drink,
but I sometimes have to resort to fear in which I slink.
I worry if he will get home okay,
I really hope so, so that he can see the brightness of the new day.
I love him with all my heart but I hate being treated this way,
This is my dilemma,
and in this dilemma
I
Stay.

#saddrinking #alcohol #sad #idk #depressed

Apr 2017 allie

Too small

Apr 2017 allie

wouldn't you like to know

Too small

I may be too small to see
over the edge of the countertop
but I am not too small
to see past your lies
and into your heart,
mind, and soul

I have many good friends who are smaller than I, but watching other people underestimate them, motivated me to write this poem. Enjoy.

#deep #small #mind #soul

Apr 2017 allie

Little Red

Apr 2017 allie

Błeeding Dįamøndš

Little Red

Little red, little red
Why do you cry?
You should’ve know the wolf lurks in the sky
Little red, little red,
Why do you try?
We all know how the story ends
Invite the evil in
Expect it to plant a seed.
Breathe in the bitter air
And don’t expect life to play fair.
The child walks the thin path
And the wild walk on no path
So look what you hath done.
These problems that you’ve created,
Cannot just disappear
You have to face your own demon
Not play it by ear.
Sometimes the truth hurts, little red
Sometimes life is bigger than fairytales.
Sometimes you have to think the bigger thought
Sometimes you have to learn the lesson that needs taught.
Little red,
Learn from goldilocks.
She learned too quick
That sometimes, it’s so hard to pick.
Life is never three options,
Life doesn’t ask twice
Life can’t give a potion,
And make everything okay.
Wake up now,
On the road to the house,
Because one day,
You’ll be dead as a mouse.
Little red, little red,
Why do you pout?
Little red, little red
Stand up and shout.
There is a world beyond the wolf
Little red, didn’t you see it coming?
Don’t you ask the pigs?
Don’t you ask the bears?
Don’t you ask the storytellers?
So by the time you deliver the package,
You’ll be invited to a lifetime of suffrage.
Welcome home!
Welcome to a never ending story!
Welcome do depression,
Where everyone expects to live a fairytale.
Life’s no fairytale.
Life isn’t a mother at the book
Life isn’t a father who cares,
Life isn’t a family who misses you
Little red, little red,
Please go now
I cannot continue to warn you
About the ***** things around.
Word spreads fast!
You won’t last!
Little woman!
Look at your feet
They’ll take you places far away,
Places that you’re safe to stay.
Little woman!
Walk from the evil
Come to a better place, and end it here.
Little woman!
This is your story,
Why can’t you break the chain?
This is your story,
So make it end in glory!
Little red, little red,
Carry your basket,
Swing it from side to side.
Watch the world ‘round you
Cause the pied piper will play his tune
Sway you from side to side
Until you collide
With reality.
Little red, you are not reality!
Escape.
Go, escape.
This story ends here
The story has to end now.

Will be a song

#fairytale #wakeup

Apr 2017 allie

The plane

Apr 2017 allie

wouldn't you like to know

The plane

Flying high above the clouds
Just to set out your shroud
Trapped inside with nowhere to go
But suddenly, the plane has gone slow

Skyrocketing to the earth
You wonder if it’s worth
It to die and to never be found

Watching you fly in the air
Plummeting to the ground and you want to help
But you have to stay strapped to your chair
You can hear a dog yelp
From off in the distance
You know there is no more resistance

You know that it is over so you give up the fight
You don’t want to die like a knight
So I decided to write
This poem about your flight
the flight that changed your life
and mine
but not for the better.

I still hate rhyming poetry but I had to do this for class, and it came out pretty good so I put it here and if you were wondering:
This poem is about my friend that I met when I was younger, and I only knew her for a year but we became really close but she died in a plane crash.
So, yeah, this is my ode to her.

Apr 2017 allie

When I go live

Apr 2017 allie

Błeeding Dįamøndš

When I go live

I love the voices
the cheer
the madness
the love
the rage
the rush
There is nothing quite like being cheered for.
Like when me and my band play their favorite song.
THE CROUD GOES CRAZY
And I soak it up.
The ultimate cure to depression?
Join a band
perform
and Scream
#Metalcore

To my band: Bleeding Diamonds
https://soundcloud.com/user-123704847

#band #live #fun #fame #metalcore

Apr 2017 allie

Snakes

Apr 2017 allie

wouldn't you like to know

Snakes

Do you cower at the sight
of its slender figure
slowly slithering closer
across the cracked fall leaves?

they crunch under the weight
of your black and green scales
winding your way
c
  l
     o
  s
e
   r

Like a thread
flowing along in the dust
your bright red eyes
pierce my soul like a dagger
and when I fall to the ground
you slide up my chest
until we are face to face

I look you in the eyes
never wavering
never blinking
unmoving
your tongue flickering
mocking me

But I can't take it
My eyes twitch
almost unnoticeable
and the fire in your eyes
seems to get bigger
more powerful

The horns on your head
glowing red
like the devil inside me
And your eyes turn blue
crystal
like the crashing waves
outlining the setting sun
behind it
But my heart has frozen
your eyes cold as ice
pierce my soul like a knife
but I am already dead
.................................

Apr 2017 allie

Blood

Apr 2017 allie

bryn

Blood

drip
drip
drip
red
too much.
too much blood.

help me

#blood #depression #red #drip #toomuch #toomuchblood