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coyote Dec 2014
you dont
believe
in ghosts
but you're
the only
one who
sees
me.
coyote Dec 2014
every single
detail about
you reminds
me:

we are
gods;

but i was
never holy
before
you.
coyote Jun 2015
sometimes,
i think i could
be good for you:

press hot water bottles
to your aching jaw and
kiss the feeling back into
your sedated lips

pin myself beneath
the weight of your
medicated gaze and
tune my ears to
your slur.
coyote Nov 2014
i spoke to
a stranger
with a
hair-trigger
self destruct
button that
they wanted
to push:
and god,
how i wanted
to help-
but when
it came time
for me
to leave,
i left.
coyote May 2015
scribble something
significant on a bar
room napkin; write
"i was here" on a
bathroom stall

just to let some passing
stranger know you were
there, and you were
sentient, and sensitive,
alive and suffering, and
you mattered.
coyote Aug 2015
I HEARD SOMEONE SAY
THAT BRUISED KNUCKLES
WILL ALWAYS LOOK BAD
WHILE HOLDING A
CHAMPAGNE FLUTE;

I WONDER THEN HOW YOURS
CAN LOOK THIS GOOD
WHILE HOLDING MY WAIST.
I.
coyote Nov 2014
I.
i still can't tell
if the longing
i felt
was innate
or passed
down to
me.
part I of ∞
II.
coyote Nov 2014
II.
i am not
a boy in
a dress or
a girl in
basketball
shoes:

i am
saltwater
wrath and
******
teeth in
the dark;

all that was
before you
and all that
will remain
after.
[ tread
            with
                        reverence. ]
coyote Dec 2014
i thought
he was
special:

i thought
i was
special.
coyote Dec 2014
i am the game
that had you
hooked for
weeks; until
you mastered
the levels and
learned
the cheats.
IV
coyote Dec 2014
IV
i am trying
to learn
the language
of letting go
with a tongue
swollen with
the thick accent
of holding on.
coyote Feb 2015
I held him
like the sky
holds the moon:
through the night.

He turned my arms
to jasmine:
tangled himself
in my veins
[I mean vines]
until I grew
around his shape,
and then cut himself
free
come sunrise.

I still reach for him
in the dark:
the reckless god boy
in star-child clothing;
loose lipped
and wonder-eyed.
going through old ones. here's another.
coyote Sep 2015
ONE: STAY PRESENT

TWO: DON'T WASTE VALUABLE TIME BEING ANGRY

THREE: THE FEELING OF NOT TRYING HARD ENOUGH IS HEAVIER THAN GRIEF
coyote Aug 2015
their fair skin
and pale eyes
and dark hair
fate them to
the frequent
assumption of
close blood
relation.

but surely one
must wonder
why a sister looks
to her brother like
he is the harvest
moon: beautiful
and haunting and
much too far away.

their matching
eyes meet with
the impact of
car collisions.
his bruised
knuckles graze
the back of her
hand as they
walk through
southside.

she is much too
young to kiss
the seam of his
inner thigh, but
she does.
drunk poems.
coyote Dec 2014
it came to
me spoken
from the voice
of everything
that ever was
and ever
will be:

stop *******
around with
white boys.
coyote May 2016
she has a way of making small things feel significant:

the way she taped her moving boxes together,
double stripped: she doesn't know if the first one
will hold; her white lighter superstition; the way her
skin was quick to bruise, even when you were gentle;
her broken teeth, the lost fillings you ran your tongue
over like your tires on her pockmarked street the first
and last times (and all the times in between) that you
drove to that bad side of town, where shoes swung
from power lines and women wept over the sticky red
bodies of sons and husbands and fathers but only spoke
in hushed, shamed spanish about their own blood loss.

in the end, there's nothing too significant about it: she has
trust issues that extend to duct tape and lighters; she bruises
like a peach; she has bad teeth because she was too poor to fix
them; her love dried up like the brazos in the texas summer.
coyote May 2015
i'm putting together a mixtape,
a lot like the ones you used to make for me.
and i'm working hard, choosing all the right songs:
ones that encompass our history, your leaving,
and every bitter thing we've been through.
as if it'll make a difference.
as if it'll bring you back.
as if i want you back
in the first place.
poems written to the tune of whiny punk songs
coyote Dec 2014
you made me
stronger for
the next boy:

but god,
how i was
only working
for you.

i wanted
it to be you
so bad.

i still
do.
coyote Nov 2014
october boy:
i wanna make you
my forever boy;
my never sever
always together,
whenever boy.
coyote May 2015
break me in
like a new
pair of shoes;
i might give
you blisters,
but only for
the first mile
or two.

and sometimes i
forget my mouth
is meant for making
words, and when i
drink i can get mean.
but i come with a
money back guarantee:
it's all right there in the
warranty.
coyote Feb 2015
bird on the branch:
i find myself
fascinated by
the speed in which
you crane your neck;
quick flashes of
movement,
an attempt
to see this quick life
from all directions.
red
coyote Apr 2015
red
i won't say
i love you.
i won't ask
you to stay
when you
can't. i will
never hold
the hushed
promises
you sneak
to me in the
dark against
you when
the day
makes you
break them.

but if you
let anyone
else
touch you,
hold you,
*******,
like i do:
i will see
red.
drunk poems
coyote May 2015
it's true:
love never dies.
it's just easily lost
like a set of car keys
or a child in a supermarket.
to the keeper of lost things:
return my love to me.
coyote Dec 2014
why the ****
would you
advise me to
speak my mind
if you never
intended to
listen?

ive let you
wade into the
rivers of my
body with
your clothes
still on,
and your
indifference
made them feel
more like
rivlets of rainwater
coyote Nov 2014
how can i
tell a boy
who laughs
at the concept
of souls
that he
sates
mine?
coyote Nov 2014
lavender and
lemongrass:
november and
an empty
moon.

i'll take
any shape
you ask me to,
just as long
as it takes me
closer to you.
coyote Jan 2015
we like to
kid about
ruining
each other:

because
we know
the potential
is there.

i am not
ready for
you to
wreck me:

but the
potential
is there.
coyote Dec 2014
how do i
become
significant
in the life
of a boy
who claims
the stars,
and the
unexplored
caverns of
the universe,
are overrated?
coyote Jun 2015
i want to
tuck songs
behind your
ear like loose
hair because
it's the only
way i can
tell you
how i
feel.
coyote Apr 2015
i hope you don't
think i didn't
tell you that i'm
sorry
because i'm
not the type of
person
to say it over the
the phone;

i didn't say it
because i'm not
sorry,
and i never will be:
you self obsessed
*******.
drunk poems
coyote Nov 2014
trusting tarot cards
and boys with
long, thin
hands:
just trying to make it
into some
long-term
plans.
coyote May 2016
your song gave
my life some
meaning
but took away
the sharpness of
my hearing.
coyote Dec 2014
the words that
leave your
mouth don't
die once they
hit the air:

they sink
into my head
and i carry them
there.
V.
coyote Dec 2014
V.
i have only
known love
balanced on
the axis of
comprosmise.
VI.
coyote Dec 2014
VI.
the more i
love you the
more it
occurs to me:

to love you
is to love
the slow
destruction
of the self.
coyote Dec 2014
I.
it's like
talking
to a
*******
wall.

II.
get  over
yourself.

III.
you take
everything
so *******
personal.

IV.
*******,
seriously.

V.
i'm sorry
too.

VI.
it's not like
i'd stop
talking to
you.
coyote Feb 2015
i want your
lament logic
and your
tangent tongue;

i want your shape
in my mattress,
and your breath
in my lungs.
coyote Sep 2015
I WILL FIND THE MEN WHO HURT YOU AND I WILL TEAR THEM APART: I WILL SATE THE DEPTHS OF THE STILL SEA'S STARVING
BELLY WITH THEIR BROKEN BODIES.

**** WITH MY FAMILY AND YOU WILL
KNOW THE TASTE OF YOUR BLOOD.
IT WILL BE THE LAST THING YOU TASTE.
coyote Oct 2015
it's a bottomless pit of both
pride and tiresome duty,
knowing that you are the
glue keeping a family together.
coyote Dec 2014
i will
bend
into
any
shape
you'll
have
me
in.

****
dignity:

i want
you.
coyote Aug 2015
APPROACH     MY    ALTAR
WITH FEET    AND    HEART
LAID BARE:   I    AM    GOLD
CAST    ANTLER    CROWNS
AND    T HE     SMELL     OF
BURNING  IN  YOUR  HAIR.
I AM THE  ABRUPT  DECEIT
OF DARK WATER, I AM SON,
I AM DAUGHTER. I AM  THE
FOREST  MADE  HOLY, THE
BRANCHES  WHICH  HOLD
UP THE SKY. I AM MOTHER
OF    SHARP     TEETH    AND
FATHER OF NATURE'S LIE.
coyote Aug 2015
I will romanticize,
and heathenize,
and fantasize the
murky mundane
waters of this life
pure. I will heed
no warning signs;
I will pencil dive
into depths
unknown.

— The End —