i think
i loved you
long ago
before i knew
what love was
and something
tells me you
love me now
only because
when i laugh
by his side
you always
turn away and
whenever I
try to approach you
you purposely
run out of things
to say and it
pains my heart
to think that
we were so bad
at getting our timing
right and now the
most we will ever
share is never
sharing our light
i think
i loved you
long ago
and maybe you
did too
but timing is one
hell of a thing
and you still never
said I love you

Have you ever been in love?
By being in love have you ever felt trapped?
Not only trapped in your heart but in your mind?
By being trapped have you ever felt lost?
Like imagine yourself sitting in the dark, cold, darkness of the night, sitting in a cage. That’s locked up and no one is there to let you free.
That’s how I feel.
By being lost have you ever felt like you give too much to people who don’t want what you give?
Like love!?
I give a lot to people.
By giving a lot do you feel forgotten?
Can I ask you one last question?
How old were you when you fell for somebody who didn’t care?
No matter how close you two were

I FREAKING LOVE POETRY. i don't care that the boys snicker about me behind my back because i was writing verses on the top of my math binder. i don't care that my friends call me overdramatic for it, don't care that everyone forgets to support my endeavors until it concerns them don't care don't care don't care

2. LOVING YOURSELF DOES NOT MAKE YOU SELFISH. my love, it's necessary. it's okay to look in the mirror and think you're pretty. it's okay to put on makeup because you like the way it looks, or wear nothing on your face at all. it's okay to wear a dress because you know it's your crush's favorite color, but it's also okay to dress up for yourself. wear what you want, do what you want. **** **** up.

3. SHOOT YOUR SHOT 2018. go for it. go for him, go for her. take a risk. the worst thing they can say is no! and if they say no, you get the next best thing... closure and the ability to move on! release your fears like a truckload of bricks and let yourself learn to love.

4. YOU ARE TRYING YOUR BEST. YOU, YES YOU. life is freaking hard. it will kick your ***. but the question you need to ask yourself is will you get back up? there are dark days. i won't deny it, there are days when the rain won't stop pouring and you'll be drowning in it. but then, one day, the rain will cease and the sun will shine again. it may seem like a stretch, but one day.... i promise.

5. EVERYONE, LET ME LIVE MY LIFE. if i want to be a writer, let me. an engineer? that, too. take the classes i want? yep. hang out with the people i want to be surrounded with? definitely. don't judge my choices and compare them to your own, there's a reason i made that decision and not you. mind your own business, if it concerns you, i will consult you.

the one before you tried to heal my scars.
he always said
"baby, no one wants to buy damaged goods."
and i always nodded my head, kissed his cheek,
let him try and heal my scars so i would be
his perfect angel.
then you came along,
you encouraged me to leap under the fiery sun,
let my scars burn white hot like an angel's wings.
you always said
"baby, no one wants a carbon copy;
your scars make you the best kind of uniquely beautiful."
and although you may be gone now,
i will always remember to dance under the fiery sun
and let my scars burn white hot...
just like an angel's wings.