my first
a lion inside a boy
a full moon (i thought you gave off light; you only reflected mine)
a breathless english winter, pale and icy
an explorer of collar bones and thighs and shoulder blades
my love, my life
the loveliest flower, or perhaps an entire garden
a time traveller (you showed me the world at 5.30am)
a stupid teenage boy
july 28th to november 4th
a semicolon - a story to be continued;

Like a butterfly going back to its cocoon
shedding its intricate wings
and wrapping itself in darkness
waiting for the change to be complete
back to the familiar nothingness
that has become so familiar
it feels like home

What I found really ironic
Was that my head teacher stood up in front of us and said
“I know what you’re thinking and why you’re thinking it;
Because you’re teenagers and therefore you think you know everything.”

And I wonder if he ‘knows’
That every day I question
The conversations
Between constellations
And the persistence
Of my selfish existence
And I wonder if he ‘knows’
That every day I question
What colours we choose for crying
And what I gain from lying
And the age at which it became OK to play pretend games again
Or whether we even ever gave them up.

And I wonder if he ‘knows’
That what he’s said is ironic
Or if he really thinks he made a good point.

youre so unlike
anything ive ever
experienced
when you look at me
everything blurs
except those brown eyes
that remind me of the ocean
im so entranced
in everything about you
but, oh god
when you say my name
the way your lips
form the letters m-i-a
oh god
i ******* love you

The truth is that letting go of you has not been an easy task
Time has not been kind
    To my fragile mind

Sadness reverberates inside my chest with every heartbeat when I think of you

Some days I flare with anger
Some days I crumble with the pain
Some days I'm fine

The memories are happy
But I try my best to suppress them
Because all they do is fill me with an aching, empty feeling

truth is--
I miss you,
I miss us
     But
The truth is
That you don't

The truth is
That I should be over you
Truth is
I'm not

"I was happy, when sadness gently walked into the room and served me the most brutal slap that my feelings ever tasted."

KD || Sadness

You said it
I still can't believe you said it
You feel the same way
How did this happen
I feel like soda can being shaken and then thrown
I'm going to explode into the air
You said it
But now what
I can't do anything about it
But I could
And I want to
And that scares me
But you said it
Just one kiss
That's all I need
How bad can one kiss be
There could be nothing between us
But I hope there is
I want to feel your spark
I cant believe you said it

Can I be your Da Vinci?
I'll help you paint that fake smile, clearly.
Quit running home and painting your thighs red
Run and lay your
Head
On my bed
Instead.
Don't look in my closet
The skeleton named 'typical' hides to drag me into this deep blue
And he's looking for you to come too.