I was always lost.
I think I may be found, now
or at least I know you're out there
looking for me.
I'm someone to look for now.

Madness could engulf me--
its flame to my poisoned heart.
I hope a sliver of sanity
will keep us forever apart.

I exist in fragments
scattered over years and moments
of love, of joy, of pain.

In fragments held by people;
I hope they need them someday
if only a brief remembrance.

In fragments lodged in places
where I've been or have wished to be,
where I loved, I laughed, I cried.

In fragments in your heart
that I broke myself for.
Those fragments I may not find again.

I exist in fragments
broken but knowing
that maybe we all need a fragment of me.

Home for me is darkness
where I can't see but only think.
Reality paints a picture
with frailed brushes and dried ink.
I have a rich eye
for the most beautiful art
so I've done away with scribbles
and the editing part.

I'm scared of ink running free
and bleeding into a depiction of me.
I even struggle with the pristine version of me
that's crafted by my discretion
yet I see it and ask questions.

Why am I painted in shades
of grey, black and blue?
I hope to see my life unfold
but regret it as I rue
the persistance I put upon wondering
instead of going forth and wandering.

I'm left in my life to discover
instead of have it uncovered.
I need no brush or a pen,
just a heart and a new life to begin.

I hold your love
so closely on this jagged cliff,
balancing, somehow, you give me strength.
We have mere inches of safety
but years of love and lust to live for.

I look down and see darkness imminent
but look at you and see my life unlimited.

I'll hold on in my sleep
I'll hold on when I'm awake
journey etched in many grains of sand
and I can't forget it because
you cast a tornado to blitz my window
as if I understood your symbolism
of little grains of sand that you told me
each one is more than its appearance
as its apparent you're at peace with this desert climate
while you told me it's best to dig deeper
because there's so much I'll never
comprehend like each piece of you is a grain of sand
So I'll hold on in my sleep
I'll hold on when I'm awake
because I'll never let your little grain of sand drift away.