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  May 23 Artis
Lyle
do you know what its like
to wake up every morning
and be disappointed that your eyes open?
that your heart still beats
and there is still air going into your lungs?

if so I am so so sorry.
Artis May 20
The Last Day

What would you do
On the last day
Of your life?

If you couldn't turn back the clocks—
They were broken,
Frozen in time,
Only showing all the time you have left,
All the time you have wasted.

Would you:
Finish that book
That you said
You would come back to—
But never did?

Make peace—
Tell everyone
You were in the wrong?

Hug them,
Tell them:
"It's okay,"
And laugh
Like you used to,
Without a care in the world.

Would you
Go lay in the grass,
Watch the midnight stars
One last time?

Would you
Finally set yourself free,
Not hold back,
Let go of the guilt—
That once held you by a string,
Making a nice web
For you to sleep in?

Would you call
The love of your life,
Who melted away—
Vanished like the night
After years
Of saying: "No, I can't"?

Would you
Tell them to come over,
Shower them with roses
One last time?

See the sunset
One last time,
As you hold them
In your arms—
As you tell them
You love them,
Let everything out,
Let them cry in your arms.
They say, "I love you" back—
But really,
Your "I love you"


        
         -

                       Means goodbye.
What would you do? ❤️‍🔥
  May 18 Artis
Lyle
being lonely is different
then being alone

you can be lonely while surrounded by people
but to be alone is to be truly by yourself

and when you are truly alone
the worst kind of lonely sets in
Artis May 17
Why is it so easy
For someone to
Break a heart
Tare down walls
Only for theres
To be left
Untouched?—

The duality
The selfishness
Tear everyone down
Only caring
When the same
Bit of water
That they once drenched
Someone in
Touches them.

Only caring
When they fall—
On there own sword
When someone finally
Touches them with—
There own cruelty.
  May 14 Artis
Cadmus
Don’t be alarmed
if evil blooms
where you sowed
your gentlest good.

Not all earth
welcomes roots
some soils rot
what should have stood.

So plant with love,
but learn the ground,
for even light
can be misunderstood.
A reflection on misplaced effort, toxic environments, and the wisdom of discernment.
Artis May 12
Unlit Hours

Late nights—
they’re the worst for me,
bringing out the worst in me.
Mind racing,
like it hurts to think.
Not a moment of peace—
fighting myself just for a second.

Fighting peace like—
there is no hope.

I wish I could help,
but it’s hard—
when I hate myself.
Can’t stand who I am.
Lately,
the only relief I find
is in causing—

more pain,
more defeat.

These late nights,
they make me feel
like I’m not worth it.
When I get love,
I throw it away—
feeling undeserving.

Cold, alone, I shiver
at the thought
that night is coming.
It knows how to find me.

Dark thoughts consume me—
every night.

I don’t want to die,
I just want relief.
But I can’t have it.

I’m a broken record—
but I let it play.
I’m used to this feeling.
Is this what I was meant to be?
How I was meant to feel?

Every morning, it’s me—
looking through the glass,
waking up in this body—
wanting to throw it away.
I sell myself lies
that things are getting better...

and I still buy them.
But they’re running out of stock.

Knee-deep
in the darkness that I made—
of my own actions.
The night controls me,
makes me feel worthless,
hopeless—
I hate myself.

Like there’s no daylight in sight.
Artis May 9
My heart beats for you ♥
But yours stops.
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