I stopped at a red light
And heard

I waited in the checkout line
And heard

I walked the dog along a sidewalk with weeds in the cracks
And heard

I made tomorrow's lunch for work
And heard

I laid sprawled out on my bed
And heard

Sirens
Horns
Gunshots
Ringing
Screaming


One night of anger.

How can I love
When my coffee *** is only half full
Because you're not here anymore
To smile with me every morning?

How can I love
When I still find your hair in my car
And can't bear to throw it away
Because it's the only piece of you I have left?

How can I love
When the same sun warms our faces
But you're not here for me to cool
Your lips with an iced tea kiss?

How can I love
When my coffee *** is only half full
Because I didn't make enough for three
When I called off work without a warning?

I wanted it to be you
I bled for it to be you
I prayed for it to be you
But there was always someone else
In my bed

I like letters better
When they're rearranged
Into your name

The wind whispered softly along
As if not to bother the sleeping child in its cradle,
The angry trees about to lose their beauty,
And the neighborhood paperboy on his bicycle with his scarf wrapped tightly around his face.

The wind caressed the crystal flakes that fell from the heavens
As if to console the father whose son was sacrificed in distant war,
The daughter who was destined to walk the aisle without a father,
And the excited mother-to-be whose child was stillborn after months of tender love and care.

The wind calmly strolled down 8th Street
Where the early workers stood in line for a bagel and brew,
Where children gathered near the corner filled with vigor and youth,
Where tall giants of steel and stone shone with haughty pride and modern couth.

The wind whispered softly along
The curves and wrinkles of my face
As my life forever changed,
But it was just another day
To the wind.

Go back to your black-and-white world

Void of color and warmth

And of depth and of passion.

Go ahead and crawl back behind

Pages of guilt and chapters of pain.

Hide your face with the cover

Of the latest Roth novel

And forget that color and fragrence

And feelings and senses

Exist.

I stare at walls and see her there

A flower-printed love affair

Her azure-striped and plastered hair

Are cracked but perfect, everywhere.

Her skin of beige, it ripples soft

Across my palms when I get lost

I feel her smooth and supple skin

When I can't think and need to sin.

But here is now, and now is then

I'm staring at my walls again

Each one reminds me of the face

Of fallen angels barred from grace.