Venjencie Clifton Arnold

Venjencie Clifton Arnold Apr 2018

I remember those fears,
During those years,
Making coffee for your cup,
My belly so tense and tight,
Crying hours before you got up,
I knew what was coming even if
I did get it right,
The taste of blood from my nose,
It was too hot or too cold,
The bruising on my cheek,
It was too strong or too weak,
Or maybe not sweet enough
to suit your taste,
Burns when you threw it on my skin,
Years of coffee made joy a waste,

Now making coffee causes me to grin, This time the man on the receiving end,

Says it's perfect everytime with a big Ole grin.

True story. Please get out while you can. Constant fear. 19 years with a narcissist. Emergency room's but telling lie's. And sometimes needed to go but wasn't allowed. Never hit my children but it was hell for them

#abuse #wastedcoffee #pain #emtional #depression #domesticabuse #narcississm #sad #broken #jenciearnoldswritings

Venjencie Clifton Arnold Apr 2018

"migliore" (traduzione itialiono - tradotto dall'italiano in inglese) ~Venjencie

"migliore"
   come fai a sapere se il tuo meglio era abbastanza buono se non fosse abbastanza buono ~Venjencie©

(translated from Italian into English below);

                 "Best"
      How do you know if your best is good enough if it was not enough? ~ Venjencie©

#miglioreBestWrittenByMeAbtMeOn04122018AnnaVenjencie

They say if you tried your best then that's good enough. They say, do your best that's all you can do. Well, that's hard for me to swallow, when doing my best, most often times I fall short of being good enough! I go over and over in my head and in my heart about what is so wrong with me that I cannot get it right. I've done everything possible to change that about me. I meditate and pray about it. And after all these years, this late in my life, I can't remember once being good enough, even when doing my very best. At times even becoming obsessed with making sure it was just right. I'm tired. I don't understand. IDK even know if I'm doing the tag's below correctly.

#italian #life #emotions #feelings #notgoodenough #best #migilore #addquotes #tired #true

Apr 2018

Hopeless Outlet

Stuck

I'm kind of stuck
At least... I think I am
Somewhere between telling everyone I know to *******
And "just please come hold me friend"

Some place in between an uneasy heart and hectic mind

"I'm depressed"
Can't I just say it without having to explain why?
Sometimes I don't even know which reason to choose

Short replies

"You seem like you don't want to talk"

You're right, but I also want to reach out
I want out
I want to let go of everything
And capture it all in my arms

like a fire fly in the palm of restless hands,
Just let me hold on to your light
Atleast, just for tonight

Because I'm feeling stuck.

#stuck #firefly #depression

Venjencie Clifton Arnold Apr 2018

"Poet Boy"

"Poet Boy"
I met this kid... that kept his writings hid. Since a small boy, he kept his artwork hid. No one ever knew all the writings he did.
That night we met, That night I'll never forget. I was under the moonlight feeling sad... He must of sensed that I was feeling insanely mad. Him a kid; me an adult, Before I could
question as to why
a boy his age was out that late, without a word he raised his shirt revealing the artwork he always kept hid,
His blue eyes matched mine tear after tear,
He must of knew the secret I did bear,
So without hesitation,
I raised my sleeve's
to reveal my scarred skin of poetry.
I know this may sound strange but that night both of our live's suddenly began to change,
We haven't crossed paths since,
But we share something of a 6th sense,
He's happy now
and
shares his artwork
in museums of famous names,
As for me, I'm old at the age of ninety-three
and
my poetry resides in books of famous names.

#PoetBoywrittenbyme@VenjencieArnoldon04042018. # https://www.yourquote.in/jenciearnold

https://www.yourquote.in/jenciearnold

#emotional #selfharm #moonlight #poet #depression #cryseries #scars #life #fiction