Lay with me one last time
Hold me close, breathe me in
Cuddle thoughts of our past
Dark times are creeping in.

Lay with me one last time
Wrap your arms and your soul
Around me, let me know
what you feel, how you're hurt.
let me know, let me know.

Stay with me one last time,
before we part for good
we dont have hours left
i'd stop time if i could.

Be with me, oh, please be
i am hurting all over
pain has now taken over
i cant see.

Shut my eyes dead
i cant see you go
i wont let myself see you walk out of that door.

lay with me one last time
Stay with me, hold me close.
put your hand on my heart, feel it bleed, feel it stop.
lay with me one last time
While i die in this pose.

my very own dark corner is now gone
been occupied with someone i have never seen before;
so i don't have a place to hide no more
and seems my wounds are opened up by the fresh air and feel so sore.
the sunlight hurts my eyes and i can't see
not only what was in past
but also what it is that lies in front of me.
i wave my arms to find something to hold
that doesnt work too well for me for i am still unstable
though i can feel the rain and wind through my grey bones
everything rushes desperately to fold
in away from me.
ah am i sure i even want to be

4 am but I'm here
where could i disappear?
4 am and I'm still
under your spell and will.

soon will come the sunlight
and the nature wake up
still I'm going to ask
what am i doing here?

4 am and I'm drunk
but on my own self harm.
where could i disappear
from under your wicked will..

with my hand on my heart
i let you go
i watch you turn around
and the pain slowly grows.

as my eyes fill with sea
and my soul is in pieces
all that we have been through
races through my bones swiftly.

im afraid to inhale
in case you start to speak.
and i want to hear everything
you dare to think

with my hand on my heart
i make a promise to love you
till last memory fades
and even beyond that too.

as my sea is now ocean
as my heart is now broken
and i watch you leave us
i can feel my palms soaking.

please don't do this to me
please don't go
please come back
yes i know we will fight
we will curse and break up

but i want all of that
nothing worthy is easy
and you are more than worthy
of the hell that i'm living.

i asked you to stay strong
i found the words
i hoped you 'd never cause such deep
and blood filled wounds.
we all get restless, and sometimes give up
and i betrayed myself so much i called it bluff.
and every note and word is now soaked in my rain
every day has had a mark left on, to see how time goes by in vain
would you remember how it was back then
we fooled around it seemed to harmless to pretend
instead of working on what we have got and we have had our share of tears
you wanted to move on with someone whose love would not seem so intense and fierce.
with someone who would never make you cry
someone who's near, not worlds away like i.
oh well, maybe you find what's best for you
don't want to lie, i don't hope you find truth.
i hope you suffer like never before.
i hope you feel the rain like it is downpour
i do. i really, really do hope you get hurt.
you get all bruised and covered in your dirt.

We are as hopeless
as our hearts at love.
we are as worthless
as our given oaths.

we are all lost
and our names are unknown
we don't know ****
but you claim you have stronger bones

and everyone around you
isn't worth your time.
one day she is your future
the next - you sell her for a dime

to the first stranger that you cross paths with
to the first poor man roaming these blank streets
to any blind guy who won't speak a word of truth
you'd sell her and move on to someone new.

great minds think differently
but work together perfectly.
when one is willing to submit to sanity
make sure you are the one who keeps the folly.
for two sane people will give birth to ordinary
whilst
lunatic will bring to this land something odd and jolly.

we are as hopeless
as our heart's desires.
where we need water
we're looking for fires.

we are as lost
as a new born star up in the sky at night
we are as new to this world
as of death the fright
after you nearly met it face to face

my mascara became my foundation
and my lipstick now turned into blush.
just like you once were my inspiration
just like our car ride is now a car crash.

and my hair used to be bright and healthy
my skin used to feel lively to touch.
now i can't even see my reflection
i don't think i have got one as such.

once i smiled and felt so rejoicefull
now i can't look up, not when you're there
never thought i could be so regretful
left alone with so much love to spare.

i won't hold on to you, you are hollow
empty like a life for those who live
once they no longer have who to follow
and they're just not yet ready to lead.

only the guy above knows i have suffered
tortured like a witch, like a weak slave
i will always love you, you're unworthy,
but your cowardliness did make me brave.

you can't buy love
but you can buy a ****.
you can't buy happiness
or time you won't get back.

you can buy beauty, health and friends
you can buy anything
so look after your wealth!

you can't buy…oh
wait, you can buy it all!
as long as you have enough money to your name
the world will lie at your feet and follow every step you take.

the lack of air makes me feel just as if
i lost you and with you away went ground beneath my feet.

does anyone need
what i write on this page
probably not
unless i'm Nicholas Cage.

anaemic and pale
i'm walking these streets.
they resemble the corridors
where you get lost for weeks.

they're not pretty or homely
they make you feel sick
anaemic, confused
your faith grows weak.

I close my eyes when crossing the road
i become deaf when birds sing their songs.
i don't want to be happy-
here it doesnt make sense.
i'd rather lock myself up
within self pity and tales.

we never fully recover.
we never get up from our knees
we never know what kind of power
lies beneath our stumbling feet.
we've had our ups and lows
were way up high and saw the hell below
i d like to see you fall down from your throne
id like to see you cry and your heart eaten by the blackest crow.

when i was young i was naive
i used to love and then deceive
i used to own and leave behind
and hoped one day i would be fine.

My mother said the pain will ease.
hers never went away at all
but she kept saying
daughter please
just carry on.
i used to chase the planes and cars
i used to jump over the bars
so reckless was i, and so dumb
my mother said it was the climb.
you have to push and hurt and fail
to write your own beautiful tale.
the prince...i havent met him yet.
just came across the hourse he had.
the house got tired of his ****
and left him saying he was cheap.
im moving on looking for lords,
looking for kings and knights with swords.
why is it getting harder to give love?
maybe because i was bertrayed or cheated on
maybe because he was unworthy of
whatever.
i will one day meet the right one
who will give me a beautiful prince son.
someone who i'll live for until i die;
find someone who would keep me near
in stead of looking for a way to kick me out.
out of his life forever.
the one who'll tell me i'm his dear
the one i know so much about .

sometimes i am
sometimes I'm not
sometimes my mind tights into knots
sometimes i live
sometimes survive
sometimes somedays i take a scarf
i wrap it round my neck and hold
the ends until your arms unfold
it didn't happen the last time
i thought i died, but now I'm fine.
sometimes i shake
and let it go
sometimes i laugh and carry on
sometimes somedays
i meet new me
and at that point i let it be
and then i see my eyes shine bright
when i don't see of you a sight.

Is this what mother calls 'the purest love'
when you curse your child like he is no god.
you bring him down and make sure they know fully well
you regret giving birth to them.
that's how my mother treated me my whole not so long life
now that i'm lying breathless, pale so lifeless
she oh finally seems like she does mind.
and still she looks and says:
"what a disgrace! you could have taken pills!
save what you had of a such pretty face! "
little she knows i hear every word.
i hear her sigh, her heart has already burnt
all memory of me and what i left
is no longer alive. she took my life but got away with theft.
oh mother! why couldn't you love me!
i tried to clear the skies above your head!
oh mother! why couldn't you trust me
forgive me my mistakes. but you cut the last thread.
my hollow body's hanging on a noose.
my legs are finally seem skinny,
clothes are loose.
i finally have that light in my eyes
oh, woe is me, to shine i had to die.
oh mother, i prayed please don't torture me
but you had different view on what daughter should be
if only i was loved and understood
maybe i would be happier than i thought i ever could.

The only time I thought I wanted to let go
Was when you said you had no strength to carry on.
How many times I asked to fight the world
But it was only me you fought.
Not realising we will die without
Your eyes shone bright with joy in pure day light;
But every word you said it broke my dreams
So far away from what my smile seems
To be; its hard not to break down in front of you
And even harder not to cut your veins with truth.
Our farewells never good but rarely bad.
though one ends up healing their broken heart.
What time has done to us we ll never know
But distance for sure won’t be end at all.

i dont need many words to say
how desperately i wanted you to stay.
how i would hold you in my arms until i die
until there s nothing left but ashes in my eyes.
i  told you i would never leave your side
i promised i would learn to get it right
amongst these ugly faces and mad thoughts
i try and find the hope i need the most.
so what s that that you said the other  day
you weren’t ready well neither am i, i say
but i want to be with you every waken second
hold your hand when you re feeling down or lonely or just mad
i want to be there while i can remember how fast you force to beat my silly heart.

You want your freedom
Want your *****
You make my fairytales come loose.
Apologies dont mean a thing to both of us
You re still unfair and I still jeopardise your trust.
I want to be with you see that you care
You only talk, you choose truth never dare.
I want a first dance, want your crying eyes
To shine so bright and be clear like blue skies
When I am in the whitest dress…say yes.
My life is not a fairytale
Of that I’m sure.
But I believed you d make it one
You d make it pure.
I’d fall down to your feet
I’d hug your knees
I’d beg and swear I love you
With such ease.
In love there is no space for pride
I say im sorry and I never hide.
What hurt the most that you don’t understand
how much it hurts and how hard to pretend
To make my peace with what I always feared.
To know what could have been and realise.. I saw- it disappeared.
You made me stronger I have ever been
But now im so weak, and my hope s so thin.
i want to make you feel like i am not forever
eternity seems to be not so long.
i want you to keep what we have
and treasure
what we will have as long as love goes on.

When the last leaf has reached the ground
And sky gets filled with innocent white snow
You ll start to see what you have found
Reveal the love you re desperate to show
The lightning strikes in your bright soul
We chose disguises for us all
To hide away from all the pain
Convince we dont waste life away.

i dont need fancy house or a super cool car

i dont need diamond rings or the stars from the sky.

just your smile, your laugh

will be more than enough.

we re struggling we re fighting

and we hope for the best

noone knows what will happen

we dont know when we ll rest.

as long as we end up being by each others side forever

id keep going through the storm until i cant remember

my name and purpose why i came into this world

and your name will be only word

i know.

i hate to deal with this and that s my curse
a spell that someone s put on my poor heart
right now and for a long time i felt nothing worse
could come.
i see the autumn leaves whirl in the air
some raise higher and higher
and some fall desperately,
touching the ground they flare.
the world around gets duller every day,
it s flooded with hope’s tears
and unaccomplished dares.
the sky is grey the thoughts are dark and thin
i want to walk until my legs give in.
i want to fight until i feel no more
but in the end i know
it s you i ve suffered for.
you re worth every teardrop
that i cry
every smile that i force and smoky heavy sighs.

you know it's been a long time,
since i got burnt so much.
you know i made myself die
oh my, so many times.
i got bruised, beaten and swore
i d never cry again,
but then i met your heart and your eyes
that brought me so mach pain.
i thought i could hold on to what we
've created within months
but that wasn't enough to live but
it was enough to last.
and i would curl up on the floor and
cry until my mind'd go blind and
i would knock on locked doors and gates
but nothing i could find.
the times when i was ready to get
my memories and hope and leave
and follow you to the edge the world
but your glance is so stiff.
you took my hopes not leaving a trace but
i knew it was you and not the place
where i am right now or have ever been
i hope now this will never happen
again.

If time can justify us being apart

We will get through this phase no matter what,

if dreams can help some people fight the pain

we cant let all we have go down the drain.

get over and move on, new day will come

get used but fight the world until you re drunk

on happiness and love, keep your blood hot.

we'll find our peace and use what have learnt.

a bit of hope has all the colours you can see

and hope has every teardrop of the sea

so you can swim and if you start to drown, just don't give up

even if there is a stone ******* to your neck and your cup

‘s half empty.

i hope you change your mind on some of things

some of those dreams that hurt the most

i hope that very soon you ll be able to see

the cost.

i ll make my peace no matter what you choose

i will support and bite my tongue and lose

i ll sacrifice and give all that i have

to make you see, it s only you i crave

i love it how you make me laugh by being you

i love it that you  make me be so serious when i dont know what in this life i have to do

i found my best friend you have always been so close to me

i found my soulmate who would unconditionally let me be.

now when im learning to believe again

its hard almost impossible and breathing seems to be in vain

but look at you and such innocent smile

i feel so bad taking all that away from you

i hope one day i ll prove to you im worth it

but you might regret things you didnt do

it s so, so hard to keep my cool and smile

you dont want to grow up and i ve been grown up for a long, long while

now. sometimes i feel you ll leave me i dont make you happy

and then i try but crying just does nothing.

you never feel my tears in any texts

you dont feel pain in my voice when i speak

but probably im just to much of hopeless and lost child

who knocks on closed doors going sad and wild.

I prayed to the moon to raise the tides,
I begged the soil to bury my pain
I cried to the heaven “Please, heal his deep bites”
If only I knew you ran deep in my veins.
Scratched my skin ‘til I bled,
Walked my feet till they’re dead;
Broke my bones, pierced my heart
Took my sanity, you
And sent me back to the start.
It might have been the sun
Might have been distance or planes
Whatever it is I would walk it in days.
This place is hopeless,
And now I feel so worthless,
Giving me time to forget
You’re staying calm and so voiceless.
I don’t know where you hide,
Or how you spend my nights
Let me go, let me out
No longer want to be yours.
Give me back my own god,
Return strength to my bones.
I get so desperate sometimes
I don’t want to inhale
The same air that you breath
Wish to forget your full name.
I welcomed Death in my arms
Believing it Was my friend
And I still think it is so
To a certain extent extent.

When i was drunk and broken
you took my pain away
you heard the words unspoken
when i was young and broken.

When i was mad and angry
you cleared my veins from pain
you took away my envy
when i was lost and angry.

What do i know about life and its beauty
everyone seems to be born knowing what they have to do
but i could never cope with assigned to me duty.
i’m just stuck in this hell i’m going through.