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How funny
I'm shaking.
Can barely put on my makeup.  
I've known you for years, but here I am shaking.
For years we've known each other, but for the past several I've been hidden.
I'm free now,
and tonight I'm shaking.
My first date after my seperationof being married for 11 years.
A spirited moon
   'neath furtive glances,
      anguished of despair
looked upon hushed
  entangled constellations
      and heeded a warning,
for he knew well of lavishing
    recherché intricacies,
mattered naught how exquisite
  nothing lasting could come
    of liaisons's effusive grandeur,
       'tween clandestine stargazers
 Jul 2015 Mallow
Got Guanxi
please please take my diseased body,
exoskeleton broken irrelevance and and put the pieces together,
as a hobby,
to resemble a body,
you own my bones, and my capillaries are filled with foreign grapes,
bottled up, squashed and refined mistakes.
the levee breaks,
how does that **** stained fluid taste,
you druid fakes, robotic flakes, for heavens sakes,
the lessons break my heart.
or at least bends whats valuable into a malleable state.
crossed borders and crossed words,
word search and cross words,
finding me is just a doing word.
the symphony is simplicity, bittersweet or so i heard.
your patchwork, the match works when it strikes the corrugated sides of my insides.
starts a fire inside like a colt 44.
you've heard it all before,
but the sound is so obscured,
prevention or cure, i'm not sure anymore,
the sea shore is so far away,
that lands no longer a plan of mine.
but whenever you're around,
it's steady ground or quicksand.
my minds, mine. abused.
IQ through the roof,
but still sheltered from the storm by you.
born again like i'm passing through,
the ages created by the frustrated players,
of the game of life.  

Tonight, i'll sleep.

If i find you in my dreams then you belong to me.
it's not wrong to be,
in love with you.
it can't be.
 Jul 2015 Mallow
Got Guanxi
why don't you get me?
but you get yourself,
i'm you inside your mind, you're not special.
Mankind is more than you,
but man doesn't exist - other than yourself.

what a pity,
the city is so pretty.
made by those more busy than your idle hands and plans.

your vision -
solipsism,
you won't listen to me who loves you more than you could ever believe,
but i'm not programmed to project my beliefs on the television screen.

they'll never listen.

more fool you.
you're a fool,
fools gold.
been told,
but you still don't know,  
how we grow and how we've grown.

nevermind, nirvana said.
you were never mine, karma said,
lay me to rest in the restless tempress of your best dress and whatever you say, and whatever you said.

what did you say i don't know and i've no idea what you said.
it's black and white, i fell for you like the domino effect.
what did you expect darling?

oh darling. you should know me by know.
i'm the ghost in the clouds that rains down when the conversation drys out.

fluffy and high,
i'll pass by soon,
and the skies will be blue again.
just like you again
 Jul 2015 Mallow
Got Guanxi
I used to climb Trees

Out in broad daylight,
where we used to ride bikes,
My home time was defined by streetlights,
fistfights and first times.  

I used to play kick stone.
outside on the roads of my home. 
Scared of the dark when I was home alone. 
A sombre tone in those days. 

My cul-de-sac was a continent,
you couldn’t count the times 
we jumped hedges and jumped the brooks,
wider berths as we grew and beamed with confidence.

He grew up on the other side of the brook to me!

Exploration into dilapidated buildings,
to seek out lost felines for the £10 reward. 
One guy got stung by a bee nine times, 
he lived to tell the tale of course.

Thinking back sometimes, 
It was us who had nine lives,
playing on the tramlines and and swimming in high tides.
colliding with live wires and life lessons,

We built sandcastles and burnt them down,
in spaces of seconds.
Lost in imagination.
I stayed in the sea until my fingers wrinkled, 
but this happened more often in the bath if i’m honest.

It seemed so simple, 
within the borders of our town, in those days.
The good old days,
or so they say - 
but i don’t disagree with the sentiment of it all, if i’m honest. 

It’s a ghost town now,
Treehouse's and broken fences,
Sweet shops and trips to the dentist.
A playground apprentice,
like Dennis the menace,

Ernie and Bertie,
maybe.

The bell rang more times than I care to remember.

It symbolised the beginning of the next class rather than the end.
To some at least, i’m not quite sure precisely who.
But it always started in September. 

Those were the days, 
Kiss chase and roller skates 
missed chances and romances.
First dances and your first falls.

The sycamore tree got smaller,
but remains the exact same size.
The boys got a little bit taller,
some of us guys even became wise.

Life is full of surprises. 

We flew apart. 
The sun went down and we grew up.

And now I don't climb Trees anymore.
my best friend
 Jul 2015 Mallow
Got Guanxi
k.o
 Jul 2015 Mallow
Got Guanxi
k.o
It's not about how many times I knock you down.
It's about how many times you hold out your hand so I can help you back up.


When you're wrong you learn something new.
When you're right, you learn nothing.
 Jul 2015 Mallow
Got Guanxi
Moon
 Jul 2015 Mallow
Got Guanxi
In the morning when the moon hides,
That's where I'll be.

The same place,
The same face.

Lost in thought, lost in space, floating around you, just in case;
look up you might see

I'll be amongst the atmosphere biding my time,
Waiting in time to shine off your reflection.

I'll be there at the reception of the clouds,
Waiting for the storm to pass.
You'll be proud now when you see who I am crescenly.

Presently I'm a lunatic, the tides not been on my side recently.
I frequently find myself hiding amongst the abyss, prophetically deep in thought,
waiting for the storm to pass and reveal myself like a lunar eclipse.

Those loose lips cause a nuisance.
Sink ships.

But why do you care about those haters with so many holes and so many craters.

That's not like you, that's not the moon I know.

I'll see you later this evening,
like most nights,
or I might of the storm passes in time.
Full moon
 Jul 2015 Mallow
Got Guanxi
Through the woods and over the train tracks,
they left for days but came back different.

It wasn’t soon long gone before they found out that,
Some teeth are sharper than others.

A a sharp knife isn’t effective for as long as a claw hammer.
To be blunt.

We never had enough, we never made waves with the velocity to make a strong swimmer drown in tough waters.

Dogged deep teeth and red wine stains in the carpet.
They don’t recede easily or back down without a fight.
there's no shame in command, but theres no virtue in cheap tricks.

We didn’t see them for days,
that barbed wire fence with it’s nylon victims flapping in the wind.
Battle ground house holds, but peaceful playgrounds.
We stayed until the bells rang and then we slowly walked home.

I carved your name into a tree, or was it mine. I can’t remember,
the tree says Nathan, so I guess that says so much.

I left my scarf in those woods. I wonder who found it.
maybe it’s still there or decayed in time.
who knows,

the woods might have the answers if we could only would ask the trees.
green green grass
 Jul 2015 Mallow
martin challis
the crescent moon, bent
like Arjuna's bow
draws her ink-dark arrow across all heaven

she is first to intersect venus, then mars,
then on in one omniscient arc to trace
the centre of being

across skies, across eons
across all beginnings, endings,
all that is and was

long to outlast all human experience
and all that can be foreseen


MChallis © 2015
 Jul 2015 Mallow
Just Melz
Whether it be secrets or lies
She keeps them hidden inside
Miseries and agonies too
She's beside herself
Without the silence,
Too much noise breaks through
Not knowing what else to do
She runs to that place
Where she keeps her silence
Hidden away
It's dark there
And filled with so much pain
But she can never let the silence escape
Too many losses and nothing to gain
Let the tears rain, she can't explain
So, she hides herself in her dreams
With the silence she keeps
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