I looked at my cousins profile today
It was full of happy birthday
Prayers and wishes
Greatness and I love you’s
I miss you’s and please come home
But I can’t help but scream
And cry and pray that he never sees the light of day.
That he rots away behind the only bars that are keeping me safe.
I pray his sentence was life,
But the justice system doesn’t care.
They don’t care my will was pinned down
My voice was kept silent
And a magical experience ripped away.

I looked at his sons profile today.
Drawing and anime all the way.
Updated pictures free will to walk.
Free will to go harm another person who’s lost.
No punishment granted.
And smiles he may
Stealing the smiles he wiped from my face.
He plays little games with cards always winning never losing just like how he won that day.
His Facebook reveals all
No regret in his eyes.
No apologies given
So here I lye

I looked at my rapists profiles today
And the the justice system failing
To keep me safe.

When you were sleeping in the car and holding my hand you held on to me so tight I tried to let go to turn the wheel and you gripped even harder. So I drove around a little and let you sleep you were so out you were snoring and in that moment I was sure that you were scared to loose me even in your dreams. And my heart melted. When you kiss me you don’t reach for my pants or my ***** you pull me closer and I can never get enough of your touch and your eyes and when your lips touch mine. It makes my night and my day, and I never thought in a million years we would be where we are now. Last summer left me heart broken but never did I ever regret being with you. And I am so grateful of what we have and share and I hope and pray we never loose it or loose the sight of us. I believe that last summer was a right thing at a wrong time and we’ve reached our time and it’s time to do this right. ❤️

I’m sorry I didn’t come with a warning label as you stepped through my door.
I’m sorry there wasn’t a sign on each room you walked in.
Depression
Anxiety
Bipolar
Bulimia
Anorexia
My crazy over obsessive thoughts
My past
My present
I’m sorry for the **** I think
For the **** I feel
The **** I can’t help but I’m just tryna keep it real.
Like when you told me you loved me right after your hand touched my face,
Yeah that love was pretty true.
I can feel it in my disgrace.
“Baby I’m sorry”
“Come back”
“You know those actions weren’t real”
Yeah baby okay, so I just get on my knees and I pray.