I tripped and fell
Where did I go?
I cannot tell

Do you not feel the weight of infinity on your bones
That as you search for the answers this burden holds
You are merely moving topsoil
We queer little creatures try to shout when we don't even have a voice
Try to dig yet don't have the sinews nor muscles to make a choice
We try to ascend past ignorance
And in doing so truly show it in believing there is any possible recompense
For this futile attempt to define our existence
We are merely flickers
Indistinguishable in the scope
Of the infinity that swallows us whole
But in the end there is truly only one answer
That no matter how much we ****
No matter how much we sift through the sod
There will always be the reaches of the universe to account for
The infinite presence of God

cranberry lips masking a serpent's tongue
and the smell of burnt wood on your skin
left me hanging
like a fish from a line,
desperately wanting a taste of
something new
despite how harsh the consequences were bound
to be.
that wild side
sprouting from your bones
sent me on a riot,
and you were not willing to bail
me out
of the mess that it led to.
I must admit
I am congested
from the puffs of soot sleeping
in my lungs;
with my options becoming
limited
all I can do is smoke you out
of the remaining corners
of my body
you've managed to stow yourself
away in.



Copyright ©  2015 Alyssa Packard
All Rights Reserved

Reap a reaper,
riddle a riddler,
Out-think a thinker
while watching a man who
still steals steel
find peace in a
pierced piece,
as he see seas
that are ceasable.
laughing at laughter because it's laughable.

Risk seeking
to seek risking
so you can feel feelings
of love for a lover
because they're lovable
while realising that in reality they are not reliable
They get sensitive
about sensitivity
is that sensible?
Questioning questions
that are not questionable.

End at the beginning
or begin at the end
to rest restfully as you
dream dreamfully about
articulating art artfully.

Do your  parents wonder, why you take time to open your door?
How you cannot wash their dead daughter's blood off your bedsheet
Go tell them how she bled to death for someone who would not even look her way or do anything to prevent it lest his hands get bloodied

Do they ever wonder why there is no mirror in your room,
or notice how you cringe at the sight of your reflection as if you've seen a ghost And how that is the case exactly?
Go tell them how your own shadow scares the wit out of you,
as if it is mocking you and soon will reveal your dark secrets to them.

Do they ever wonder why you have so little photographs of you?
Go tell them your face reminds you how you turned into everything you said, You would not when you were a kid; how you are just a pile of unsaid goodbyes, abandoned building, shattered dreams stitched up together by skin you dont feel comfortable in.

Do they wonder, why your hands are often on your ears as if you are trying to block some loud music only you can hear
Go tell them how his words keep replaying in your mind.. how he told you so many "truths" that you no longer know which version to believe in

Do they ever wonder why you have no friend or why you keep staring at the wall and yet your eyes appear to be seeing right through everything?
Go tell them you are looking at his eyes turning colder by minute, till you don't recognise who he is; that he has seared goodbye in a place inside you so deep that you send your friends in love,  packing bags long before they plan to leave.

Do they ever notice how you cringe when they attempt to hold your hand or hug you?
go tell them how all the times you were let go still echo through your skin,
how you always acted like a filler? how every one you loved had their eyes set on their destiny and you were always traffic

do they ever wonder, why you always seem more restless at night? Or, how they never find you asleep?
Go tell them how the future that you could have had but did not haunts you every night, How you think you have enough time but then you blink and suddenly you are all out of it and you ask Him for 5 more minutes but he just shakes his head.