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T'was Then

T'is Now

The presence

Selflessly

Forth(with)

Giving.
What about that word play eh? Cool or am I just a dork? Lemme know.
 May 2017 Leory Santana dawn
Ra
Courage to be vulnerable
Courage to tell the truth
Courage to see
Courage to be seen
Courage to hear

Courage to feel
Courage to feel me

Courage to let me be

Courage to be
All these words,
All these feelings,
I'm a madman
Yelling at mirrors
Scrabble pieces mixed up,
Fifty-Two cards shuffled,
I'm ******* insane
I don't know reality anymore
sometimes i wish
that i could hold up a mirror
to your face
so that you could see
the truth.
i want you to know
just how
you make me feel.
you know the feeling
you get on a roller coaster?
when it's going down
the biggest hill
and your stomach
drops?
i feel that too.
in my heart.
and instead of making me laugh
and throw my hands in the air,
it makes me fall to my knees,
gasping for air,
screaming for help.
i wish you could see that.
i wish you could see
the you that i see.
the you that
causes me pain
and heartbreak.
sometimes i wish
that i could hold up a mirror
to your face
so that you could see
the truth.
Nails on my skin
you pull me back
the only thing keeping me from death
you whisper,
don't go..
But you let go
my arm falling limply to my side
I shake my head slightly
and you nod
Tears streak down your red face
but you know
that I have to go

I remember,
looking up
I could see the shining stars
twinkling happily
out my old bedroom window
If only I could be as happy as them
Clouds cover the stars tonight
coating the world in a navy slur
But I hold this knife now
taken from my kitchen
hidden in my sock drawer
And I stand here
feeling stronger than ever
hidden so no one will find me
I can't deal with this
I don't care about the abuse
I know you won't miss me
I write this to inform you
that I was never happy on this earth
I might be on the next
No one will know
No one will care
So today I draw my knife
and I press it to my chest
as one for the billions
No one will miss me
My hand shakes
droplets of blood fall
mixing with tears
I have to
Don't worry about me,

**I'll be fine
Written by Charlotte (I wanted to add my own notes) | I love you, M. Don't leave us, because then we'll all die. I love you so much.
Nails on my skin
you pull me back
the only thing keeping me from death
you whisper,
don't go..
But you let go
my arm falling limply to my side
I shake my head slightly
and you nod
Tears streak down your red face
but you know
that I have to go

I remember,
looking up
I could see the shining stars
twinkling happily
out my old bedroom window
If only I could be as happy as them
Clouds cover the stars tonight
coating the world in a navy slur
But I hold this knife now
taken from my kitchen
hidden in my sock drawer
And I stand here
feeling stronger than ever
hidden so no one will find me
I can't deal with this
I don't care about the abuse
I know you won't miss me
I write this to inform you
that I was never happy on this earth
I might be on the next
No one will know
No one will care
So today I draw my knife
and I press it to my chest
as one for the billions
No one will miss me
My hand shakes
droplets of blood fall
mixing with tears
I have to
Don't worry about me,

**I'll be fine
From your BFFs (AM, BB, CC)
Don't go..
I know you don't like to stay in one place
For too long
I know you don't like to sit around
I know you don't like to see the same face
Day after day
I just want you safe and sound

Can't I keep my arms wrapped around your waist?
You don't have to go away
Can't I keep singing in your ear, locked in your embrace?
Without you I'm afraid
Girl, you make me brave.
It's okay to lie sometimes.

Like if I seen you kissing her again
and just the look on my face
has someone asking if I'm fine,
"Of course I am!"

Like if I found out you got married,
she was with child and brought
to life your dreams that I dreamt of
helping come true
I'd smile and could only say,
"I'm so happy for you!"

And when the day comes
and it finally sinks in that you
so easily forgot the boy that
could have loved you forever
I'll just type out an easy,


'Who are you again?'
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