Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
 
 Jan 2019 Katie
n stiles carmona
Fifty-percent illusion at any given time.
Your unintended muse will plead 'not guilty' to the crime
Of snatching back the quill and reshaping every line
into the role she wished to play
-- it seems the choice was never mine --

but the boy with the weighted wedding ring,
the self-appointed jury of the south;
him sheepish at the door with roses,
and the brute who owns this house.

Was it feminine mystique or was I crystal clear
while you blocked your ears and pretended not to hear?

A three-act structured tragedy.
All archetypes assigned.
"We've had this date since the beginning" --
if the part must be mine to play,
it is in my hands to manipulate.
Direct your blame to those who cast the roles.

Torn petticoat, blue piano;
flattered by the dimming glow --
oh, to be glossy pink and gold!
A trophy bride. A victor's prize.
(I snap awake and still see his eyes --
that ego swells him thrice my size --
with bruising force, he parts my thighs.)

Was it hysteria - madness? - or was I crystal clear
while you blocked your ears and pretended not to hear?

My fate was written for me,
in the frontal lobes of those who came before me:
down that narrative route, all bumps and troughs -- desire!
Fragments of an old Rossetti poem... o, vanity of vanities... the streetcar rattles and groans.
self-indulgent b-side to the prior poem 'i, ophelia'; honing in on blanche dubois (a streetcar named desire). excuse the rhymes, it's been a while.
 Jan 2019 Katie
Dor
Taste.
 Jan 2019 Katie
Dor
Brewing.
Steeping.
The leaves of the crunchy,
Dry,
Oolong tea.

The chocolatey aroma…
So intoxicating
Like a psychedelic dream.

Auburn orange.
Amber yellow.
How these colors swirl within the tea cup.

Dipping a spoon in to twirl it.
Left.
Right.
Counterclockwise.

At last, the tea was ready.
Cool.
Not too hot.
Not too cold.
Just right, like porridge.

The girl was ready
To savor the
Lovely drink.

She took the tea cup.
In her delicate hands.
Tipped it to her chapped lips.

The warm liquid
Glided.
Smoothly.
In her mouth.
Down her throat.

Her tongue wanting more.
She smiled,
Before continuing to
Finish
Her ravishing tea.
Sooo, I re wrote this poem with a different title and a different POV :)
 Jan 2019 Katie
Dor
Sun and me.
 Jan 2019 Katie
Dor
The sun strikes my eyes
As I turn my head, left
To look out
The ***** window.

And it suddenly
Hits me.

Searing my eyes
With pain.

Blinding my mind
With white magical light.

At that moment
I think...

No...
I don't think.

I simply close
My eye lids
And with my mouth
I smile.

The widest smile-
The corners of my lips
Reaching my cheeks.

And I breathe.
Breathe and beam.

Enjoying this moment.

The sun
And me.
okay, this poem came to my mind when I seriously turned my head left to look out the window lol. The sun, my lover? oof lol
 Jan 2019 Katie
Dor
My heart beats wildly
Fiercely.
But

I am an empty vessel.
No soul...
Nothing.

I yearn for something more.
But I won't let
Myself have it.

I will not allow
This sort
Of happiness
Belong in my
Life.

The one where
One loves
Another.

These are the rules
In my heart.
Permanently etched.

Wish I could melt
My feelings
Away.
Into.
A.
Giant.
Sea.

You see,
I am not cut out
For this happiness.

Overthinking.
Overdoing.
Overachieving.
Over-trying.
­I am just over-everything.
 Jan 2019 Katie
Dor
Bedtime.
 Jan 2019 Katie
Dor
Facing sideways,
A tear trails down
My face.

My mind is racing,
Zigzagging.
Forming.
Calculating.
Identifying.
Backtracki­ng.
My mind is simply marveling...

In all the things
In my life.
The good.
The bad.

My mood,
Feels so sad.

It’s late.
And a door for contemplation appeared.
Seemed like the right gate
To open...
On a winter night
Like tonight.

When the silence is ever so vast.
And the darkness is ever so deep and unending...
TBC? i might work on this more? just came up with it last night! thanks for reading, if u do read my stuff lol
 Jan 2019 Katie
n stiles carmona
i.
you wonder if somewhere there's a voodoo doll with your face stitched on
(and if it's covered in pins since god knows that would be the logical explanation)
who goes away in winter? he'd laughed and laughed
-- and in spite of yourself, you let him

you very patiently explain that with european winters
'the sun's still out but it's no cancer risk
and the air's still hot at night but it doesn't try to choke you
and what's more cathartic than a spanish caravan park where you're serenaded by crickets?'

playing it off as a quirk, not an excuse to be anywhere else

he'll never know the comfort in being
little more than a passing stranger
a face on a street or in a window or a car
transient, fleeting; the short-term memory lasts roughly thirty seconds
so you're a stranger in a yellow polo and then you're nobody:
it's the circle of life, but compact and mildly less terrifying

ii.
unexplored streets and brains are bigger than home:
you can only be your true self when you are not at home
eyerolling, rotting from air pollution and complaining about first-world problems
you're hardly ill at mind but you're jaded and sad and sufficiently middle-class
so when in doubt, you pack a bag and think nothing else of it

you buy the guardian and a kitkat from a sullen newsagent
whose hands look like your grandmother's
(why do you notice this stuff?)
the poor guy's only middle-aged surely - he can keep the change
counting coins is weird and confusing anyway

happy flying says the hostess with a ribbon around her neck
she means it and you know exactly why she'd taken the job on:
fixed addresses are awfully limiting
and the swarms of crying babies are probably worth it
to get to go everywhere EVERYWHERE

iii.
package holiday dj digs out his usual and plays 'come on eileen' for an aging crowd
your eyes are upturned to a foreign sky and you breathe warmth
the stars are out and you are floating quite carelessly at the top of a swimming pool

happy birthday
a narrative poem, i think? not sure where it sprang from. i just like trying to access inner monologues that aren't my own, because the ***** never shuts up
Next page