I am slowly sinking
Deep and deeper
Into a ocean of thoughts
And you stand at the surface
And watch me drown.

Death is coming out of me
Every memory of pain and mourning

I’m bursting with light

Despite the dark I’ll come forth with
Roaring hope and fulfilled longing

When I opened the box it unleashed parts of the past I wasn’t ready to confront ,
Memories I would rather not relive .

Maybe I needed to be confronted to actually heal , but I do not know how to handle this pain

Confrontation is new for me , having to deal with emotions other than just burying it .

How can I forgive them ?
How can I heal from this ?
How can I complete this process of grief ?

Questions I ask my self daily , questions I’m not ready to answer
Frankly .. I’m not ready for this new season in my life
I’m not ready to move on
Confrontation will have to wait .

Death calls my name constantly,
Always in my ear
Whispering to me in times of vulnerability,
One day I fear I’ll listen .