I don’t know
If I believe in soulmates
Or fate

But if you told me
That something
Or someone
Had planned for us to meet
And made each of us
For the other

My darling I don’t know
If I would be able
To argue

You are
Everything I always dreamed of
And
Everything
I could’ve never imagined

Depression is numbness
Anxiety is pain
When they are mixed
It is like fire and rain
Except the fire never goes out
And the rain only becomes heavier

Fake smile
Dried eyes
Scratched wrists
Bruised thighs
White pills
Rope tied
Gun loaded
SUICIDE.

I dream about you,
Even though I dont sleep.

Life without addiction
feels dull,
I am more numb now
than I ever was while using
the only difference sober is
I am so painfully aware of it.

Memories of fear
Slow roll of the engine
Compliments handed over
Creaks of doors

Immature excitement
Buzzed from the risk
Arrival and slow realization
A darkness lurks

Concerned smile
Tiger eyes and reflex
Swiftly save the bell
And make the journey.

Moved by resistance
Accepting of chances
Step foot into chaos
Sleep and face the future.

Tip toeing near the edge
Life lines cast
We were so close to danger
The lucky ones.

"I guess we're all in varying degrees of 'not okay'."