Seize the day, my friend
Because the birthday boy’s balloons will rise
The captain will turn his helm against the tides
And the sun will set
Below the horizon
Below a place you cannot see

So while the sun is still high
High in the sky
Show them what you’re made of
Show them why the sun rose
Why the mother loved her son for the last time
Why the soldier said his last goodbyes
Why the violinist strung his last stroke

And why you are you
For now, there is no other

What is love
Is it
The serendipitous encounter between a paper and pen
Or
The feeling
Of falling into the cold waters
Deep
And deeper
To find the sunken ship and its box of treasure
Or
The way an ore moves a rowboat
The way a sail gives direction to its accomplice
I would never know
I have only burned the paper
Drowned-
Lost the treasure
And crashed my boats

Two tears dripped
She held the cup from which she sipped
Parallel and equally heavy
That fell from a cloud she could not levy

From the taunting and teasing
They called  nothing more than appeasing
She was big
named a pig
They drew her tears
Until she could not hear

She painted her face
Dressed herself in lace
she never had a chance to feel  beautiful
Until she was dull
She took her last breath
And tears drowned her to death

A creature of habit
In dire need
Of your insatiable touch
The rush
When your hot lips were locked on my neck
As you held my face
But that look
You were dead before you died
I could see your numbness
You were a hostage to the clock
In a race against time
Before we expired

My ship sank
My sail was torn
My motor leaked
And I’m sorry
I’m sorry for treating your gold like nickel
For mixing your daisies with tulips
And stepping on your rose
I should have known

There’s this cold, saturated emptiness
That lies within me
Buried in my heart
Protected by the warmth of my veins
But all it takes
Is a ***** to its shield
A blow on its roof
To explode
Envelope my glee with its demons
Blinds the light
grinds  contentment
the satanic hug-
I call depression

I’ve been hurt
I’ve been burnt
I’ve been cut
I’ve been hit
I’ve been abused
I’m broken


You’ve felt your own merciful blood drip from your wrists
In vein
You’ve felt your arms incinerate beneath a scorching cigarette
You were six feet under but managed to find the light
My dear
You were my band aid


Maybe it was dumb, maybe it was wrong
But you healed me
You dressed my wounds and cooled my burns
My dear
You were my band aid

Those nights
When  you just lie there
And stare into space
And that feeling of your heart being ripped and tossed
Is on loop
With the same song playing over
And over
And over
Again
your eyes shut and the numbness ceases with your dreams
But you wake up
With your sheets stained of tear dried mascara
And that raw feeling
And your lips pale
Because the pain doesn’t stop when he’s gone

It was this electric burn
This insatiable satisfaction
When your hot lips were wrapped around mine
a snake on its prey
The feeling of you kissing me-
a neglected  crave
I could never get enough
And when I had you-
It felt like you were gone
Because my mind wandered off to when I would see you next
When I could get more of you
The feeling of your hands caressing my every curve and handle
The way you tousled with my hair
As you warmed my neck with your hot touch
I could savor this sentiment for eternity
But I must forget it
For I will veer insanity

Although we deny it
There is a caste system
It’s disgusting
We pride ourselves on societal acceptance
But when it comes to our PERSONAL lives,
The ugly stay among the ugly
And the attractive menace among their own
And it is perfectly normal
For godlike physique to kiss itself
But it cannot touch the curves and to spite what a bigger, or paler, or browner body may hold

There is a caste system
We divide society into classes based upon attractiveness
So that anyone who desires to pivot, cannot
And once you’re “there”
You are free
You are enlightened

But the chance given, the opportunity to thrive
Is held to the untouchables like a bone to a dog
But never to be chewed or gnawed
It’s just there
The menacing glory - hung like a dream on a wall

My roots are dug deep and have seeped every ounce of malevolent delight from a rich soil
They stubbornly intertwine with one another
But my branches remain high in the sky
Embellished by a dynamic color to gracefully appease my visitors
And my bark..
My bark is chipped at and carved into -
Scarred from the keys of momentary love
A love merely to be infatuation.
Broken.

To me,
Poetry is the serendipitous encounter
Of my dark utensil diluted with freedom
Drawn upon the ****** lined paper
Poetry is my wings of thought
Where my secrets submerge within the ink of a pen, from which every stroke is selectively drawn
It’s where I fear nothing
My bubble of elusive adoration
With poetry, I am safe.

Sometimes I wonder...
Just another mass
a chill run up my neck
emptiness bombards me
a ghost
They look right through me
no purpose.  

No one
No one to wish me goodnight,
no one to wake me up.
No one to throw myself on when all fails

But I stay, hoping one day
I fall so deeply
Not even a gunshot would hurt -
the gaze we hold in each other's eyes will numb all but love.

Satisfaction from a scent
the feeling of his hand on my hip -
as he brings it up my back,
Embrace
Making way up to my neck
grazing fingers against lips
Feel the warmth of his own pressed against mine

A white blanket lay upon the forest
Fall back into the plush
As the snowflakes press against each other
molding to your shape
All you hear is the pattering of the snow flakes onto the hoot of your coat
The world has paused

You look up to see the dusted evergreens
fairies lay a clean pixie dust upon the land
grazing every part of life

But then they come
throwing it at each like weapons
Warlike
With the intention of inflicting pain
Ripping it up with machine
chopped by sleighs and skis

And then they leave
To come back tomorrow
Wishing there was more snow to play with
As it lays there crushed and ripped up with the land exposed
Nothing to fix it
Because there is nothing as pure as ****** snow

Some say "thicker" models are better,
That they promote self-love,
As if thicker women are not expected to love themselves.

But all it really does is set another standard.
A new standard.
Standards are the culprit of deprecation -
Another reason to feel ugly

But every standard is another reason to feel different.
And that makes YOU special.

I lay with my wrist cuddled beneath my ear
The second hand  of my wrist watch jolting itself every second
My little sister's soothing snore rumbling the bunk
My mother's room across the hall dark and cool
But downstairs in the kitchen, the box of twinkles calls for me
A summon I must refuse

An orange glimmer illuminates the dusk sky
Making its descent as I look up
Hoping that true love is looking at the same sky -
admiring the same beauty, feeling the same rush, fancying the same glimmer
But this glimmer, this sherbert sky, this elusive aesthetic will  fall below the horizon
Below where the sun meets the calm sea - into darkness


As you savor those last few seconds of its descent, those last few sparkles
I fall as the big sherbert ball goes below the water, to a place I cannot see
A place where all my hopes disappear to
And darkness arises
I feel a spirit pull me into a realm of darkness
I cannot escape
I cannot enjoy the beauty in the black sky
after I have watched my hopes fall below my sight
A place where I cannot retrieve them, unless I’m lucky to dream about them that night


But when those dreams come true, and you have someone to stand by you at night,
That night sky you tried to escape from
suddenly becomes an alluring dark blue sky with incandescent speckles
That you can gaze at until dawn
On a grassy plain with dandelions and wishflowers as the breeze blows your lips together
Under the beauty of the  light

I stand here, while you notice everyone else but me
Even when I smile at you, you look at her
My tears dry on my face, but you can’t see them
I do my hair, I wear nice clothes
I wish there was a way to disappear
but invisibility is only when I’m here


Or maybe you do see me,
Because you turn your eyes away
I’m the ******* your feed you scroll over- purposely don’t tap twice on
One day, you’ll go back, when I’m really not there
And think to yourself what if I cared?

The awokens’ magnet
I await every morning for your sip
A sip of warmth, flushing throughout my body
You are the reason I jitter when things go wrong
An elusive satisfaction - but I relish what you give
But I can’t get enough - you never fail
Not once has your sweet eminence failed me
You are the new beginning every morning
The end to every hard day
Grind the beans, fresh and new
Add water to freshly brew

My face sprayed by the cool salty droplets of the sea
A sea that has touched everyone, shared every drip of its own
Lofty flagpoles standing strong
Undulating as the wind caresses every inch
Sailboats letting faith carry them to a place no one knows
No control
Looking upon life - flaws, peaks, dark times
Under the waves, where every sailor fears
Is an entrance to below, a place where any being survives,
But the fittest thrive

A breeze blowing my thoughts
The sweltering heat of the sun cooking my skin.
Clouds float by in the summer sky
The wind tormenting the grass as it’s thrown side to side.
Flowers blooming
flaunting its vibrancy as the wind tosses it.
Being robbed by bees,
Off beyond the fields and trees.
Birds gliding through the summer sky
Cars reflecting a harsh iridescence