He makes me feel beautiful
Which I have never felt before
I've always had my doubts and could never be too sure
Cause they told me I was ugly
They told me I was fat
They joked about me and never had regrets

And I sat there and I laughed it off but it hurt me inside
So bad that I got off the bus and ran straight to my room to cry
And I got on my knees and prayed at my window and asked the lord
"Why is this happening to me?" and it started when I was four
And yes, I still remember that far back
Cause being bullied is it's own feeling of being jumped or attacked

And he makes me feel beautiful
Cause he looks me in my eyes and tells me that I am and I can tell it's not a lie...
Because instead of posting pictures I have edited and cropped
And having boys tell me I'm pretty through messages in my inbox...

He makes me feel beautiful
Cause he means what he says
And a few other people have told me I am cute but I thought they were just kidding
Cause I have programmed myself to thinking my beauty is forbidden
Which means that I could never be a girl that is praised
For her good looks, her perfect body, and her Aphrodite face.

He makes me feel beautiful
Cause even though I have flaws
He accepts them and makes me feel like I have none at all
So maybe I am pretty and I am starting to think better
Of myself instead of looking in the mirror with a look so bitter

He makes me feel beautiful
And when he tells me so with such a serious voice, I get chills
Cause he's the first person that hasn't made me feel completely ill
By insulting or pointing out one of my many imperfections
But instead trying to help get rid if that negative venom
That people have slowly injected into my mind
Making my optimism die slowly over time
Making me get violent and defensive and making me less kind
To the point I get a rush to commit a deadly crime

Then they say I'm crazy and continue with the names
It's a cycle, a stupid circle, a horrible made up game
That has expanded to the point where death is how you win
And I would of won this game if it wasn't for my kin

He makes me feel beautiful outside and in
So I wrote this in dedication to that special him
For helping me realize more than ever in my life
That maybe I am beautiful and I've been this way for a very long time...

I wish I was a lighter I
that touched the clouds as they rolled by
and on the wings of joy I'd fly
far into the bluest sky

I wish that I had held it strong
held it true as we went along
and when the night came I was brave
and fought the shadows from my cave

But I lost my heart one day
in your smile as you drove away
and madness then consumed my mind
I was wrong, I was blind

because in you hope I saw
false as every time before
and I tried to cage you like a bird
with writing out my pretty words

I wish I was as cold as snow
cooled beneath an arctic wind
with frozen blood that could not feel
and no need to make me heal

I wish that I could see the lies
wedged with wires in my mind
I was not yours and you weren't mine
We are angels of a different kind

I wish that I could fix this mess
my insanity made my deeds digress
because its hard to let go of someone I touched
who told me that he loved me so much

If I could go and fix the past
and make it better, make it last
I would be my closest friend
a hero that won in the end

But time can't bend back to repair
it's sealed and done forever there
and we are all just broken clocks
chained within and sealed with locks

And you were just a passer by
on a break, saying hi
And I was looking for a missing piece
or maybe just some pain relief

I've been unfair and been unkind
you did not deserve to see my despair
but you responded with human care
I think somehow you understand

And I will be well in the end
as I always get up again.

Everyday I try to hold onto hope,
But I always end up thinking about hanging myself from a rope,

Unreal it seems most of the time,
But I try to calm myself down, hearing the melodious chimes,

Perplexity prevails as I try to stand up,
I never could tell if it could be this tough,

    Disaster ,disaster, everywhere
   Now I end up saying
  "I don't care"

What happened to the "I won't do anything you don't want me to"
What happened to the "okay, I trust you"

What happened to the time it took?
An hour for you're eyes to have a different look.

How did it turn to "do to love me?"
How did it turn to you stealing my virginity?
How did it turn to you not stopping
How did it turn to ******* cherry popping?

You saw my tears
You saw my fears
You saw that I didn't want to
But yet yourself you still drew.

You heard me when I said no
But your mind heard go?

It might been better if you had waited a few
But what happened to "I won't do anything you don't want me to do"

What's the cost to be pretty?
I'm fat
My stomache is out of place they say
Don't eat
I want to look in mirror and be happy
People shouldn't tease me because I'm not skinny
be skinny
Who cares if I'm unhealthy
That's what it takes to be pretty

Saying goodbye
To someone you love
Is like reading the final page
Of an amazing book.

As the last chapter ends
You begin to notice
Just how beautiful
And perfect
The plot always was.  

You appreciate the joy
And even the pain
As you read and thumb
Through every page.

Finally understanding
The moral of the story,
You realize you've reached
The end of this journey.

Although the last sentence  
Is the most difficult to read
Another great book awaits
Once you turn the final page.

Eventually you may stumble
Upon yet another great find.
Or maybe you'll return
To the book you left behind.

You may just discover
Once all is said and done
That this particular book  
Was your favorite story
All along

What's the point in loving, when it always turns too sour
when you have found the one you want, attracted by loves power
love blossoms between two souls, like a new born open flower
elevating your true feelings, on loves affectionate tower
love washed away with every storm and every raining shower
why does it all diminish by the day and even hour by hour?

They always say they love you when everything is new
Way back at the time when both your loves first grew
so very comforting knowing their loves there to turn too
forever your life long love there is no other view
they say their loves forever, why does it always go askew?
you can not help who you love what are you supposed to do?

why do they always tell you that their love is forever?
and your the one they have searched for, no one else no never
with our feelings for each other, love bonding us together
surviving all life's problems, love always will endeavour
no matter how hard I have tried, love seems to always sever
without the love that we have. there is nothing whatsoever

those lost loves maybe gone but they are not forgotten
pining for those lost times, in my mind so very often
through times gone by, love and feelings never soften
everything starts to fall, loves sweet fruit turns rotten
love always turns from silk to fraying broken cotton
suns go down on the love we had, our life's misbegotten

there is no need to be like this, if you let me through the door
without any animosities, love doesn't have to be a chore
why cant things be the way, like the way they where before?
things that are lost can be regained I'm hoping there's a cure
but its really not your fault who you have feelings for
thinking of what should have been and always wanting more

they say your part of their life, when your hearts are embossed
a shadow of my former self now our hearts are not crossed
hearts frozen in cold feelings, loves shattered in the frost
sadness pain and heartache, times and feelings tossed
remembering the good times, these times come at a cost
because even with the small things, too many loves are lost

As I delete our pictures, trying to erase our memories,
although i know i'll still love you for many centuries.
Now you've left nothing will be the same,
my life is a never ending guessing game.

Maybe i'll love another as much as i loved you?
I'm lying to myself we both know that cant be true,
you made me feel wanted, you accepted my past;
but I must've been stupid to think a love like that would last.

I'm fed up of sitting here crying,
wishing i was laying there dying.
They said something will cure the feeling
but there's no sign of any heeling.

I love you,
but you don't seem to have a clue,
of what you're putting me through.
I should've known it was too good to be true.
I knew it from the moment you said we're through.

I'm sorry
maybe next time, I'll take time to worry
before I fall too deep.
A love I cannot keep

Thank You
To watch you breathe is a gift,
a treasure that I can't replace.
You are the epitome of timeless,
and my only saving grace.

Before there was no light.
Darkness, that swallowed me whole.
And surrounded by a silence,
one that sure had took its toll.

Shattered but intriguing,
a mystery nonetheless.
But you picked up the pieces,
and tidied up the mess.

A word, a phrase, a sentence,
like heaven to my ears.
This joy has filled a void,
one I've had for many years.

A thank you is in order,
but it wouldn't be enough.
To show you is exhausting,
cause breaking walls is tough.

I could tell you I love you,
but what I feel is so much more.
You are my guide and flashlight,
the one that I adore.

A life would not be worth living,
if your heart were not in my hand.
And to love without condition,
is the future that I plan.

From this day forward I promise you,
your heart is all I see.
You are the love of my life,
and I say thank you but you no longer love me...

My love for you is blood, and it flows around my body,
it rushes through my veins and my heart is the main source keeping the love pulsing through me.
I begin to tell our story with the typical humour and the warmth that accompanies our love,
we know no one’s adoration can be this tough
and I find the ending is stapled under my tongue,
and I know I can’t bring my-self to admit we are coming undone.

And as Shakespeare said “the course of true love never did run smooth”
And now I understand it stings every time I breathe, every time I think and every time I move,
Is it true? What they say? Are we incompatible,
No, just irrevocable and inevitable