I tried to be alone
It hurt
I tried being with people
Hurt even more
I remembered
In the fields
Me being alone
But not hurting
Except I wasn't alone
I was in that space with you
And I remember that you smiled
And that it was so incredibly beautiful
But I forgot your name
So I write this letter to the fields
And I have to let you know
I need you
Please.

I wish that someone was interested enough
In me
To read between the lines and read
Deep
To point out where I failed
And places I was strong
To stalk me and examine me
And notice my song
My rhymes
My patterns
And rythyms
And tell me that they notice me, because I
Would never guess that anyone would ever
Notice me

And its one year since our break up,

I hope that every morning when you wake up you don't think about me

I hope that every morning when you're in your bed you don't wait for my good morning wishes

I hope that every morning when you get confused you don't miss me for choosing the color of your dress

I hope that every morning when you eat your breakfast you don't care about whether or not i had mine.

I hope that every afternoon when you get bored you don't miss talking to me

I hope that every afternoon when you
need a little motivation you don't need my stupid motivational speech anymore to get motivated

I hope that every evening when you go for walk you don't miss holding my hand

I hope that every evening when you watch the sunset you don't need me to make you feel that you are more beautiful

I hope that every night when you need someone to share your feelings your heart doesn't call out my name

I hope that every night when you go to sleep you don't twist and turn in your bed and reread our old conversation

I hope that every night you have a reason to wake up for next day, A reason which isn't me.

i don't know what you see in me
or what you have seen in me
to get you to love me in the first place
because i'm
      broken
          worthless
                and everything you're not.

i don't know why you're still here supporting me
when you should have left
to support yourself
because you're
         beautiful
              understanding
                   and everything i'm not.

i don't know why you love me
and words can't describe how much i love you for just that.

but you're the only one who i know will say that i fit with you
when we both know that i'm the unnecessary broken piece.
but thank you for tucking me where i belong.

my nail polish is chipped
and my knees are bruised
and my eyes have dark
circles and i don't smile
often and getting out of
bed everyday is almost
painful and i miss too
many people at night
and i stutter when i'm
nervous but at least i'm
not dead yet i guess

Because in the end,
you'll be another broken heart
that I mended with my own.
We trade pieces of us, you see,
but I found more love from people
who also try to mend me
as I mend them.