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 Jan 2019 Gabriella
i love you
 Jan 2019 Gabriella
They’d waited too long to say

“I love you”.

3 words. 3 syllables.

Yet they held millions of emotions unspoken.

and now that they’d done it, they wouldn’t,
couldn’t, stop

they told each other all the time. In the end of the argument and before the good news.

In the middle of the storm, even though it was hard to see, and after, when the raging winds had settled on a breeze

before the rising sun turned the sky pretty colors and after it flickered out and faded away into the dark

Underneath the stars that their love had been etched into

There was no love until death for them. Because it would never stop. Their love was beyond. It rose above any border that would dare to try and stop it. There was no finish line

because they were each other’s end game.  
In an ideal
I'd spend more
Talking to

I'd agree
That saying
Is easier

I'd accept
My indecisive
And Balance
It all
Self doubt

I'd know
That sometimes
Shot gun weddings
Are okay
I'd runaway
I'd leave
I'd stay

I'd finally
The prize
Of my own
With the limited
Even keeping
Me going

I'd sit up
Lay down
Walk around
Give enough
Of a ****
I would never
Think to

I'd make everyone
Even myself
But instead


partial cred to Timothy Brown for speaking the right words
 Jan 2018 Gabriella
Nolan Higgins
Sometimes I get that feeling
I'm sure you've felt it

I feel as if I'm 16 again,
My most valuable possession
Is the skateboard I built.

It's a Tuesday and I've ditched school again.
The twelve dollars in my pocket
Is burning to be spent.

At the used book store
I spend eight of it on a paperback copy of
The Fellowship of the Ring.

Up the street to the Curly Wolf
I buy a cup of coffee.
Skating with a cup of coffee isn't hard for me.

Moms drunk again,
Probably will be for the rest of the week
And so it looks like I won't be going home
Until she sobers up enough to wonder where I am.

Can I sleep on your floor?
Only for the night? That's fine,
Liam said I can stay at his place starting tomorrow
 Jan 2018 Gabriella
“Why did you stay?”

That’s always the first words out of everyone’s mouth… including my mothers.  
They act as if you realize that it’s an act of treacherous hatred while you’re lying on the floor.
They don’t see the look in his eyes when he tells you
“I’m so sorry, it will never happen again. I love you so much.”…
  They don’t feel his warm embrace he gives you while you’re trying to cover your bruises with makeup.
They don’t feel the isolation while you’re at home thinking of who you can go to.
They don’t feel the denial as your brain tells itself “All couples fight… its normal.”
They didn’t feel the gut wrenching pain in your stomach when you watched him with tears in his eyes as you finally found the strength to go.
And the first thing out of their mouths is… “Why did you stay?”
 Jan 2018 Gabriella
H A Vitatoe
Pouring down, on top of me,
specks of dirt in harmony

Crawling through these eyes,
are the black winged flies

Slithering out of my nose,
are of worms that do not glow

What taste comes from my mouth, it's rot that pours on out

Sounds that call my way,
are crying skies of grey

For I took a ride,
that had changed my life

Beaten & strangled,
I was left mangled

Thrown in a shallow hole,
is where now lies my soul
 Dec 2017 Gabriella
A sunny day
warm and clear
A hand that is near
caring and never to deny
but I am sorry dear
all you can do is try
 Dec 2017 Gabriella
this is how it happens
it's the last day the temperature will be
above thirty-two degrees Fahrenheit
until February
you're not looking at the date
it's just the end of November
the middle of the night in the middle of a road
at the end of November
the hum of this small town hurts your ears
you're stuck in a dream where everything you see
turns into a weapon
this is how it happens
you knocked back sharp, amber liquid
to make this place feel a little more okay
and it only worked halfway
no matter how soft the edges are
you bruise your hips when you
run into them in the dark
you're ******* on your fourth cigarette when
a police officer pulls over and asks
how you're doing today
in the too-bright white of the headlights
the sick taste of Red Stag sticks to
the roof of your mouth
the mouth that you're moving into a smile
the mouth exhaling plumes of smoke at the ground
you're okay
"i'm okay."
you don't tell him what you're really doing
you're really taking all of your
thoughts about stopping your pulse for a walk
you don't tell him you've been
chasing ambulances all night long
please, officer don't leave me alone, you don't say
he tells you to have a good night and drives away
and this is how it happens
the moon smiles at you with every single one
of its tiny, sharp teeth
nobody but your cat finds you in that bathtub
nobody but your cat watches you rise from red water
watches it drip drip drip
from every chasm carved in your left arm
nobody but your cat saw the soft animal of your soul
shiver from the cold that day
it's the first day the temperature
dropped below
thirty-two degrees Fahrenheit inside your chest
based on true events

— The End —