i’m not afraid of what might future holds for me, i’m  more terrified of what i’m going to lose because of me.

I throw paper cranes out the window
of my bedroom in the sky
On them I have written
all the reasons why

The wings will tell you
why I smile
The beak speaks of why I sigh
In the eyes you'll learn
why my soul burns
and the tail tells of why I write

I loose these birds
with feathered words,
hoping that they'll fly home true
For the paper folds that I have stole
used to grow from your front spruce

And I wish one day
you'll sit and sway
on your swing of rubber hoop
and from nigh on high
a bird will fly
out of the crystal blue
and you'll learn of all the reasons why
I do the things I do
For on the crane
is a single phrase;
"because darling, I love you"

You crafted airplanes
Out of paper and tape.
Putting faith in a hero
Minus tights and cape.
Someone to take you
Up into the sky.
You and your planes
Soaring high.
He carried you there
On his shoulders wide.
Your hero took you
A paper airplane ride.
For years you flew
With paper and hero.
Airplanes gliding
Gravity zero.
Til your hero tired
Could carry no more.
You traded your paper planes
For engines that roar.
Your hero smiled
As you took to the sky.
You no longer needed him
To make you fly.

Up there on the top shelf
Carelessly stowed away
Is a paper plane
Is has been sitting there for a while
Collecting dust
Connecting cobwebs

It has a pilot
Carefully depicted inside
He's waving at me
Telling me to hop along
Once more

We used to fly
Go on magic paper adventures
In that fragile paper plane
We would explore paper worlds
Playfully made up as we needed them
And we would return
With mysterious smiles
Secret memories
No one would understand

But secrets were one day exposed
A terrible storm blew up
Lightning torched the paper worlds
All flights got cancelled
And the paper pilot was sacked

...

As I gaze at it once more
I sense him waving at me again
I smile
My bags are packed
I'm ready to go

I wave back at him
And leave a paper note
Then I walk out of the door
The taxi is waiting
To take me to the airport

We sat together,
Staring up.
A cover of white.
Wondering to ourselves
"Will we ever take flight?"

We could be the paper planes
That we've always dreamed of being.
Soaring
High above the sky.
Not realising.

The yearning for more.
Learning and growing.
Thinking.
Stopping.
Breathing.



We sat together
Wanting to be more,
Like the paper planes.
The ones we love.
The ones that soar.

Replace my cigarettes
With crayons,
My martini
For chocolate milk,
My tie
With a slinky,
My bills
For paper cranes,
My car
With a big wheel,
My home
For a tree house,
My bed
With a hammock,
My desk
For a sandbox,
My la-z-boy
With a swing,
My laptop
For a coloring book,
My job
With field trips,
My sad daydreams
For naps,
My divorce
With a time out,
The woman who hates me
For a girl that likes me,
The blood on my hands
With dirt and mud pies,
I want to; I wish to;
I have to; go back...
APAD13 - 046 © okpoet

In movies you see there is a person, Emerged in water,
Surrounded by darkness and Captivated by the silence.
You see they're drowning,
You can hear them
Desperately
Taking their last and final breath
But are greeted by water instead of oxygen.
You know they're dying
And so do they.
But in a miraculous change of events
A hand comes down to save them
Or they're awoken from their nightmare.
This is my situation.
I'm emerged in life,
Surrounded by hate
And captivated by the sadness.
I can see I'm not getting better.
I can feel myself
Desperately looking for my happiness.  Instead I'm greeted by loneliness.
I know I'm dying,
So does everyone else.
But this is reality; not a movie.
There are no miracles.
No ones going to reach out their hand and save me,
I'm a life not worth saving.
How can I wake up from a nightmare When my life is one?
                                                      ( K R W)