Summer Shellhamer

Mar 2019

Empire

I take a pill
Every night
Before bed
And it keeps away
The panic
The compulsions
The stress
The perfectionism
The drive
The desire for excellence
The 4.0 student
Everything that was
Killing me
And
Creating me
So, now I have to decide
Is it worth it?

I don't want to feel like that, but now I've lost what made me special...

I either have to return to who I was or move forward as someone else...

#anxiety #panic #worth #life #stress #perfection

Mar 2019

KM

Loss

How can I call it a loss
When there was nothing there
Nothing to work with
Nothing of value
You were never a friend
Infuriatingly ignorant
Of the poison you pour
Down everyone's throat

No, this is not a loss
But a liberation
Free from spite that you carry
Free to not worry about what havoc
You will unleash when I am not there
To keep you at bay
Away from my family
Away from my friends

Take your Spite
Take your Jealousy
Your Hated and Envy
And place them on someone else.
And don't fool yourself
Make the decision for me?
No, you just beat me to the punch
Telling me I was not your friend

I don't think we ever were.

Mar 2019

Junior Semil

No Goodbyes.

I’m grateful for everything
But I just want to experience being,
In love. Before I die.

Summer Shellhamer Mar 2019

Nothing is here to stay

Nothing is here to stay,
Like how night fades into day,
Relations fall apart,
Love into broken hearts,
Sweet words,
Honey glazed,
To sour words....,
Dismay,
Years to months,
Months to weeks,
Weeks to days,
Days to hours,
Hours to minutes,
Minutes to just-,
Seconds,
Life to death,
Decay,
We are just dust anyways,
Nothing is here to stay.

How things are to fade away into nothing..

#death #life #dust #fall #apart #heart #nothing

Mar 2019

Jade

Overthinking

I’m really scared
Im loosing it
My fragile mind
Slowly bruising it
I think too much
Overusing it
it’s my fault
But I keep doing it

#lost #mind #mental #anxiety #depression

Mar 2019

Esther

when darkness sat down next to me

lights flicker
in the distance
far far below

I’m here
looking down on it all
wrapped in a blanket
a book lies next to me
pages flipping themselves
in the cool summer breeze
inside are the sounds of life
outside are the sounds
of the questioning
the air is filled
with random notes
fluttering around me
like guardian angels
I know why they’re here

darkness
sat down
next to me
to keep me company
we look at the flickering lights
in the distance
he tells me
you’d do fine down there
if you wanted to
be a light
surrounded by light
but then he shifts his gaze
the moonlight
dancing through his being
but you’d do great
up there
be a light
where no one has dared to be
and with that
he left

#darkness #light #depression #hope