Slamming my head continuously against the wall
I felt time and space break and froze
Myself and my Darkside fought
The battle raged on powerful enough
to cause stars to explode!
Shattering through dimensions
Fractals luminated around my eyes
containing Greek numeric codes
Traced everything in motion
inaniment objects morphed in and out of reality.
Stricken by toxins contained
within malice of the human mind
Falling freely from all!
Deprived of emotional attachments!
Relying on adverse forces, in high hopes
of restoring purity! The pressure renders me helpless and discouragement settles in vital organs.

Petrified by the various timeless
effects of this infectious disease.
The screams could not be heard...
Not over his voice. This version of myself
was stronger than any counter part I had to face.

"If you had to destroy
yourself to save everything... What is left of your morale, you choose to immortalize?" To believe we fought
with valour confined to nothing more!

Other than walls we put up as fronts.
Regretfully to acquire honor sought in truth!
Truths that yearn for placement
The darkness shall not assail!!!! "Foolish of me to believe
That we held the same intentions!"
We were part of the same being.

Descovia and Darkness.
Now it's just me in the dark.

This bond by no means
could be stabalized



Blood lust only made you greedy
You have awaken fears buried for ages
I thought,  were protecting each other!
What offerings would suffice?
Hear my voice and remember your place
These words are not evidence
of salvation that we desire to
bring forth into our foundation!

You will not break me...
Bury the chaos within your wrath away!!
Leave the innocent alone!
Your evil intentions
will not shelter another heart!! " I AM NOT AFRAID OF YOU! "

The feeling of my very soul
Imploding within my body.
I feel my head sinking into my heart.
I am s l o w l y .........
Going to into
The pull of an
endless time warp.
Drowning within myself
The intensity was rushing
through me in the form of a headache
sending us on a nonstop, unprepared
breath-taking ride.

The silence which followed the combination of good and bad memories flooded my vision with tears transforming into blood.
A new light awaken in me....

white butterflies filled my eyes
Will I be spared from
The terrors which long for salvation?
Laughter surrounded me
It gave me state of security
Thoughts coming more vividly
Clarity at last... Baby laughter
Filling my heart peacefully with bliss my mind
Eases it way into a calm tide. Everything of love
dissolves into my soul.

Its finally clear around
the hungry darkness and the shadows vanished as color returned.

"Daddy" The voice belonging to a savior of purity restored reality....

I have every reason to live. Even he will not take that from me.

Even if you are me.

To Be Continued....

You do not have to walk a thousand miles  

To validate your love for me.


You do not have to fight a million heartless, for stability to prove you are the key.

Our love speaks for all near and far.

I'll always be there no matter where you are.

I love you and this my simple truth.

Words are nothing, without the meaning you give to them!

I am in pure absolution, you have as much strength, as the values and faith you have in fulfilling your very aspirations!

The combination of balance emotions and pure intentions will gracefully unfold wealth in abundance you sought for.

You can have your time in the dark.

Remember, your light is the spark responsible for continuous star life!

Believe me, you were born to shine!

If you won once before, you are going to get out there and do it again!

The day I was informed, I was suppose to have an identical counter part.


"I am neither Matthew or Matt. That is a title belonging to a part of myself, consumed by the darkness.


A life of nothing, is there anyway to depart from this?

My own hatred brought me to suffocate on the light in my lungs.

The monsters inside, reminds me through vices to be strong.

Alcoholic nights. Mornings with Maryjane to ease the pain.


The weight of sadness and the madness hits me like a freight train.


The anger is the heaviest anchor, bringing my soul into the depths of torment to never breathe in freedom again.

Where did it all go?

What is left to show?

For I do not simply know.

My shadows been keeping company. In the darkness, I feel so lively.

During a full moon, transformation into my dark twin, activates sleeping forces dwelling inside of me.

There is no escape....

If you believe, my spells are
a product measured on games and luck.

My identity will remain a mystery

If you boil an egg in water, it becomes hard.


If you boil a potato in water, it becomes soft .

Words build a way, but it's your actions which determines you will meet fate or your destination.

It doesn't matter what you go through.

It's what you decide to be through the situation!


Whether you can or can't

You decide, if it's falsified or a living lie. There's a difference, between what you can decipher with your mind or eyes

You can turn pain into art or truth.

In the end, it's ultimately up to you.

The excessive sweating, uncontrollable worries with rampaging thoughts flying at the speed of Jupiter's winds, forgive me for my fatigue, I oversleep when it was suppose to be only a "nap".

Trying to unscramble my ANXIETY

Sounds more of

"Ain't it for me."

"No exit or taxi" away from this.

What is it, you are doing?

You question yourself a lot?

I try not to. The switch activating my nerves default setting is neither on or off.

It's set to complex. Reminders to myself, realign your mind and eliminate the stress.  

If only that was the case! Stress is a killer, but it would be my savior from ****** cramps causing my disorientation, dizziness and my inability to function.

Delusional or dysfunctional. Either over plan or overthink.

When expectations fail. I feel in all ways generally, it is me. I blame for being irresponsible.

Feeling the emotional energy of all living wonders and people in time pressing on your shoulders.  It's not pleasurable, heart palpitations do not reward me with any justice in slightest.


You think it's me avoiding you. When the words of our human language cannot satisfy, my doubtfulness renders me in a state of peril, of expressing my gratitude for all you do.

I do not know, if its me.
Is it a quiet place or a quiet space needed?
The disconnection wondering inside, if I should detach from all.

A shred of reassurance goes a long way.

Physical health is mental health.

It's okay to not be okay.