have you ever been brought to tears by a single rose?

i was once given a rose
and when it started to wilt
i cut the flower from the stem
and held it in my hand.

its petals were closing,
longing to hide in a bud,
and like a child searching gardens
i opened the bud, piece by piece,
to discover what it hid beneath the bloom.

i spread the petals and it seemed to never end,
the stamen heart hidden deep inside,
and i began to cry -
these petals were soft as silk,
the pink rose could've sang me with a lullaby,

and i could not believe
that in such a chaotic world, a noisy life
i could still afford to hold something so delicate, so soft
in my own calloused hands.

i like my body when it is with your
body. It is so quite new a thing.
Muscles better and nerves more.
i like your body.  i like what it does,
i like its hows.  i like to feel the spine
of your body and its bones,and the trembling
-firm-smooth ness and which i will
again and again and again
kiss, i like kissing this and that of you,
i like, slowly stroking the,shocking fuzz
of your electric furr,and what-is-it comes
over parting flesh….And eyes big love-crumbs,

and possibly i like the thrill

of under me you so quite new

Maybe we'll meet again,
When we are slightly older
and our minds less hectic,
And I'll be right for you,
And you'll be right for me.
But right now,
I am chaos to your thoughts,
And you are poison to my heart.

They say I've always wanted to be a poet.
That's true,
at least in part.
I love writing beautiful words,
expressing mixtures of emotions,
turing words into extravagant art,
confessing my love,
but never actually expressing my love.
I love the safe excape that it gives.
The excape from abuse,
self-harm,
shame,
disappointment,
and fear.
But if I'm being honest,
the thing I want more than to be a poet...

          Is to be someone else's poem.

Thank you, ex-lover
For teaching me my true worth.
For showing that you cannot love
Based on a smile.
And thank you, *******
For teaching me to stick up for myself.
Because if it wasn't for your insults
I'd be defenseless.
Thank you, ex-lover
For cheating on me.
By doing so, you gave me a chance
To leave.
Thank you, ex-lover
For ruining me.
Because falling to the bottom only
Made me climb higher than I was.
And finally, ex-lover
Thank you for being so cruel
Now I know certain traits
To keep an eye out for and to avoid.