Its the beautiful blue
greening of spring
deep in your mind
touching the soul
knitting the heart
freeing the song.

intrusive.
you
refuse
to soothe
these thunderstorms
in me.

they're brewing.

one day they'll explode.
and even if i knew the future
nonetheless, i'll look like
a fool.

i can't quite define
why sometimes
and sundays
i seem
alright

the peace of mind leaves me uneasy

it tells me i'm releasing
the memories that eased me
back when i needed
bracing
and saving
for defacing
the part of me i hated
with passion
that resembled that
which you once had for me
especially on days
when the sun came first
and foremost

sevenfold.

Watching over the charade below
Rich in empathy and sorrow.
Just to be struck by the realisation
That she is me
And I am lost.

Trauma Center

Smoke
Liquid on the ground
My head spinning
"Are you ok", I hear her asking
"I'm an EMT"
I hear a male say
"Hold on don't close your eyes, help is coming"
Then what appeared to be the longest wait reaches an end
I hear a man almost ripping out the door from my new red car (doesn't matter it's just a car)
Finally with a neck brace and on a stretcher
Flashing lights and sirens screaming
It hit me
I can't move and my abdomen feels like I got punched a million times
I can feel someone cutting through my pants
My knees where bleeding
"Where your pants torn before the impact?"
" no," I answer
How? I was just driving

"We're here"
Push, push
Hurry, hurry
I feel all, ALL of my clothes being cut off
Tests and more tests
I'm just thankful I'm alive!  

------------------------------//////::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
The Things we take for granted

I used to breathe without having to think about it
Now I slowly inhale waiting for the pain that follows
I used to get up...in seconds I'd be on my feet
Now the pain is excruciating
I need support to pull myself up
Getting into bed is another eternal task
But thankful to God that I'm still here
And working on recuperating
Please wear your seat belt it saved my life

Pray for me
* the lady that came to my help... she sat next to me, prayed for me as we waited for the  paramedics-- her name was Lina! like me:) coincidence? I think not

Strip me of my rights, my Liberty,
I do not wish to be free.
I need direction, a director, a commander.
I will follow you blind.

Deprive me of my senses,
We both only want to feel.

I want to feel helpless,
Restrained to my knees.
I need to feel pain,
Whipped until crimson.
I hope to feel exploited,
Pushed into ******.
I feel satisfaction,
Permission to hear yours?
Sir.

You are my commander.

I am trained well into compliance.
You reward me in throbs,
Deep pulses from inside.

The motions are familiar but u are entirely different.
You can surprise me, excite me, command me; a formidable leader.
You give me everything,
all that I can feel.
All that I need to feel, alive.