I realize that what I had before
is now no more.
That what yesterday - a long lost era, a time gone by - had breached,
is really nothing greater than a hidden phantom, who will not be beseeched.
Once I thought I knew with certainty what it is that I now ponder,
that they in life did love me, just as I in life loved them. I wonder -
though to no avail. I reach my hand out as if they may touch just a finger,
but there is no answer from the emptiness. Yet I with none do linger
on that cliff edge some call hope, on which one sits, and that only
until the doubting kills all faith, while I remain forgotten and lonely
Wondering if perhaps just one step forward could bring freedom,
if just one step forward could deliver me into some kind of kingdom,
of darkness maybe, perhaps of light, or nothing - simply timeless nothing.
Though I sit in feigned decisiveness, I feel naught but hateful longing
What had been clear is now not and lays here rotting on a long abandoned bed.
A lovely thought flits through this darkness and sits itself inside my head.
But remember did I once more that all my friends had gone before me
to the place of no return, to that point which you call destiny
or fate to those less fortunate, who've received what they deserved.
Beware lest your mind grow numb unto horrors you've observed.
For if all your friends have left you, remember what I've said -
the earth spins ever on and on for those who are not dead.