I pray
That one day you will stop
Stop hurting and stop cutting
I pray every night and everyday
That you will end up okay
I can't stop you so I just cry
I pray that you won't accidentally cut too deep
And that everything will be fine
Then I open my eyes and realize
Life doesn't have happy endings

Nobody falls for you,
you only fall for yourself
Your head stuck on a shelf
Nothing but your ego left to sell

But you couldnt let it go
This hell is already here and melded
Manipulation and consideration-
All a grey shield

Its already been welded.
No space for
Me.

The sisters from convents
writing prayers on the pavements
holding forth sacraments
while
we man the battlements
but it's
every one for himself.

This is Powder Keg town
and we're all getting down
to the serious business
of keeping our heads
above water.

A sort of transparency
but you cannot see through me.

Do we ever really know where we go
when we sleep?

I wake up.
you're there.
I get dressed.
you're there.
I turn on my car and the radio.
you're there.
I go to work.
you're there.
I go home.
you're there.
I go to sleep.
you're there even more than before.
But then I realize,
you're not there.
I am here.
And you are there.
And that's how it is.
Because you and me,
will never be.

My emotions leave me worn and tattered:
My heart more than broken, shattered.
And who has caused me all my pain?
I've no one but myself to blame.

No monster deprived me of my life,
No bully gave me grief and strife,
Nor devil caused my brain to rot,
But my, for sorrow, soul has sought.

Most are pleased within their joy;
Some with items, money, toys.
Some need love and family
To drive away the misery.

But I seek not for love confessions:
No money or worldly possessions.

I am joyous in my depression.