I don't want to be wanderlust
I want to be wandering.

The scalding water
runs flows off my back,
untouched,
leaving the marks
of an empty incompleteness
long after a corrugated exterior

I sit
in a puddle
of my own tears.

so staticky
in complete
emptiness

I have dipped my toe
in the secret,
most private,
endless
ocean
that will swallow you
in the
blnk
of an i.

I want to be *******
devoured and
unearth mermaids.

I want to get lost
in the moment
and the adventure.

I want to lose everything around me
to find

myself.

What is the point
of everything I have done
when it's not something
I am head over heals in love with?

I want to lose everything around me
to find

myself.

Everything is within grasp
but clenching my fist
and not letting the dream
slip
right through my fingers
is the hardest thing in the world
to do.

I want to lose everything around me
to find

myself.

But how can I lose everything
in the wrong setting,
in the wrong circumstances,
and in the wrong way?

I want to lose everything around me
to find

myself.

It's a taste so mouthwatering
it burns,
which I can't remove
and don't want to.

I need to lose everything around me
to find
**myself.

We try and try and try, we give it our all
Yet things are mostly left undone
We always say “you’ll do better next time”
but we know that is not the case


Although things are mostly left undone
We put in the hours until we are prepared.
We know that is not the case
when we get the grade back.


We put in the hours until we are prepared.
Continually hoping for a better day
until we get the grade back
and tomorrow brings another storm.

Continually hoping for a better day
We say “you’ll do better next time”
Because tomorrow brings another storm
We try and try and try, we give it our all.

I went on a nature walk
with no idea,
no preparation,
only to take some pictures.

At a certain point
I got lost
with no phone
no one but me,
my thoughts,
and the layers of
cold sunken through.

I had no idea where I was,
only faith that I would get out
at some point
if I kept going.

I forgot everything
except this poem, my camera, and my next step.