Who am I, really?
To tell you the truth, even I don't know
I'm an equestrian poet who takes good pictures
And enjoys a hot cup of tea
But who am I?
A girl who wakes up super early for no reason at all
Or someone who wants to sleep all day
Someone who wants to look perfect but at the same time someone who doesn't care
Why am I such a contradiction?
A caffeine addict who mainly drinks tea or cocoa
Well I guess all I can say is
I'm me

A warm cup of tea and seeing his smile
Perfect ombres and a comfortable couch
A song with a beautiful melody
You may be wondering what these have in common
They're all things that bring me joy

The scent of fresh blueberry muffins
The sunset on a warm summer day
Going to the lake
Clearly my prompt for the day was joy

Knowing someone loves me
Taking the perfect shot, photography of course
A nice warm bath and waking up next to you
All these things seem simple and ordinary
But to me they mean the world, and that's all that matters.

Love forms in the spring
Just as flowers and plants bloom
The smell of spring, just as strong
The bushes and trees sway just as we do
Dancing under the moonlight
Like its meant to be
The cold air blowing against my back
Your warm voice tickling my ear
Telling me just how much you care
We dance and dance until magic hour arrives
Those short fifteen minutes of beautiful light
Just as the sun is rising, we head back home
Lying down with each other and sleeping the day away
Until magic hour comes tonight
And then, we shall dance again.

Red roses stare at me
Loud voices scream from the kitchen
My grandfather is dying
And they're paying cards
I guess he's not quite dying
But the pain meds make him loopy
And the lack of food and liquid
Make is voice scratchy and him
Unbearably thin
I'd be lying if I said it didn't scare me
I'd be a liar if I claimed to not love him
I guess I'm just not ready to lose him
Because I can't stand the thought of losing another loved one

Red roses stare at me
And I'm there with him
Holding him tight
I love you, Grampy
Please don't go yet...
Please don't go yet....
Please don't go.

My mind spirals
Spiraling downwards
Downwards into hell
Hell is a welcome escape
Escape from the life I'm living
Living is a hell in itself
Self is all a dream
Dreams fail
Failing is inevitable to me
Me my mine
My mind spirals
Down

Cold, hot
On, off
The hellfire hits my back
Shimmering the way it does
It then turns to ice
So cold it feels hot
Too cold
I crank it back to hellfire
The give up
I can't seem to wash away
The pain of guilt
All the lies flowing
Running over my body,
Like the water I soak in
I step out, my body dripping
Then towel off
I'll try again tomorrow

It's dangerous to go alone, take this
He says as he carves out his own heart
And hands it to me
I place it in a golden chest
Surrounded by countless other
******, beaten, broken
Hearts
I've done this countless times
Smile, rip out a heart, and keep it
Smile, tear out a heart, and keep it
I suppose I'm like a dragon
In the same way they horde gold and jewels
I horde hearts and love
I thrive on love
I need it to survive
My beautiful box of hearts displayed
Gold and shining
Covered in jewels with a heart shaped lock

I love you she says
Carving out her heart and placing it in my hands still beating
I smile and place it in a box
My beautiful golden chest of hearts
Hers the latest addition, ****** and bruised
She cries
He cries
They all cry
But their hearts,
Their hearts are still mine.