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Joshua Quinones Nov 2011
We took a bus to Wilmington
And skipped a dream or two
In order to be cognizant—
When the “Are we there yet’s”
Rebounded void of “yet.”

We parked the bus adjacent to
The paint-peeling facade
Of lonely temple Wilmington—
Threatening no demon of the sky
With a keenly polished death spike.

It had no spendthrift window of
Christ Jesus with the sick
And poor, neglected derelicts—
Who glow with jubilee and gold chloride
For His altruistic charities.

Across its door was fastened tight
A rusted iron chain
Which barred the shallow, blinkered souls—
Who loitered at the barrier’s feet
Waiting on God to warrant entry.

But we who were of cogent view
Detached deterring catch
And entered with our chins *****—
A light-bulb-vacant sanctuary
Where taciturn shadows took a seat in every pew.

And down a velvet aisle stood
A lonely, weeping priest
Inhaling in unblemished palms—
That not a single pious doubter
Would dare inspect.

“Welcome to my church,” he said
With breathless, choking sobs,
“I am the congregation here—
The pastor, choir, usher, and Sunday school teacher
Of Wilmington Church of Reason.”

Inquired we what hidden woe
Enlaced with torment cast
Those salt discharged convulsions—
Quaking the sanctity of exultation
In the House of Apollo.

And with concise, unleavened words
He justified his tears
And whispered to our weary troop—,
“Alone, alone am I,
Isolated within this box of omitted truth.

“O, give me soothing slumber deep
And strip these sentient eyes
From ghastly sheaths of consciousness—
Repair this mended paradigm,
Or tell me that I am mistaken.

“Imaginary friends and foes
Make wretched hearts a wreath
Of roses red and mistletoe—
And bird of paradise to keep
Hope alive, alive and awake and well, hope alive…”

So each of us, a brimming cup
Of empathy, remained
To keep old pastor Wilmington—
Old usher, choir, teacher, congregation Wilmington
Alive and awake and well.
this is my disease
here i am age 6 stealing candy from a shop on Broadway
here i am age 7 pulling a girl’s ******* down around her knees while she’s swinging upside down from jungle gym bars
here i am age 8 Jackie K shows me how to ******* to this day i’ve never looked back
that’s me age 9 creeping into my sister’s bedroom into her sleeping girlfriend’s adjoining bed concerning my sister she’s a great gal but i’ve never been physically attracted to her
this is my disease
here i am age 10 with 4 grammar school buddies shoplifting at Marshal Fields department store we got caught sent home and severely punished
here’s me age 11 erasing and altering test scores in my 6th grade teacher’s grade’s book while class is out to recess
here i am age 12 repressing my true voice and lying to my parents about everything
this is my disease
this is me age 13 being shipped off to boarding school
that’s me age 14 getting kicked out of boarding school then shipped off to another boarding school
there’s me age 15 with Kent stealing girl’s purses from Pink Panther lounge in Rogers Park
here i am age 16 stealing Mom’s sleeping pills trading to score my first heroine fix sick as a dog vomiting by the side of the road
this is my disease
this is me age 17 running away from home to Haight Ashbury CA waking up with ants crawling in my hair strung out on methadrine and acid in Berkley crash house
and there i am age 18 running from tear gas and police Billy clubs in Lincoln Park and rioting in Grant Park at the 1968 Democratic Convention
that’s me age 21 getting tricked by my parents into 3 month lockup at Institute Of Living Hartford CT
this is my disease
there i am age 23 practicing Transcendental Meditation and yoga with Cathleen at Hartford Art School
there’s me age 24 kissing with Cathleen in photo booth at the Century Theater in Chicago
there’s me age 25 working for my Dad while Cathleen is away with her family in Indonesia
there i am age 27 holding a teacher’s certificate from SAIC Mom’s idea i never wanted to discipline kids
that’s me age 30 wearing necktie working at CME and selling coke on the side
that’s me age 32 drunk slurring words telling Elizabeth and her Mom at expensive seafood restaurant i wasn’t fit to marry anyone
this is my disease
here i am age 32 stealing money drugs to support my urges
that’s me age 34 with my first puppy Taters
there’s me age 37 awarded Illinois Arts Council Grant spitting peeing splashing blood on charcoal drawings reading Marquis de Sade dismissing many girls
here i am age 41 exhibiting my first one-man show at Deson Sainders Gallery Chicago Dad dies 6 paintings sold
that’s me age 44 leaving Chicago after too many dropped ***** opportunities chances at love success no destination other than hope prayer of becoming a better person
there i am age 48 burying Taters deep in dirt in Wilmington NC
this is me age 49 working at a record store in Tucson AZ running in the mornings feeling so alone crying
this is me age 50 ******* about **** *** peeing hairy females questioning to myself do any of those fixations actually matter in a real relationship
this is my disease
there i am age 55 living without drugs for more than 10 years swimming every day awarded yoga certification
this is me age 61 without  the affections of a woman for 15 or more years wondering if i’ll ever find love
here i am age 62 returning to Chicago worried about Mom’s illness hoping praying begging for just one more possibility to prove myself
this is my disease
this accounting does not include surviving throat cancer Hepatitis C severe compound fractured wrist and 2 suicide attempts
this is my disease
sage short Dec 2015
the whispered
"I love you"'s
echoed through
the masterpieces hearts,
us being the two
most beautiful
works of art
in the room
sage short Dec 2015
the kisses you
planted onto
my begging lips
in that old
book store
let the stories
living inside
come to life,
including mine
JJ Hutton Apr 2015
The slam poet in cords, in denim,
rambles from neon beer haven
to flybuzz brothel, cracking quiet
jokes about soup to shiny junebugs
in the relentless moonlight.
One hundred dollars in thirty-five bills
slowly retreat from wallet
toward water-cut whiskey.
He’s got a chapbook widely
available at frozen yogurt shops
across the metro; he’s got a
tour in the works, tri-county,
every middle school from
Shawnee to Seminole; he’s
got a collection of ex-girlfriends,
made up almost entirely of wizened lesbians;
he’s got an MFA from UNC Wilmington,
and he shouts this more than speaks this
from his treacherous barstool to the sleepy bartender.
One of the girls, she takes him upstairs,
and to her he says, Your freckles—islands
in the sea of your milk-white skin.

The night passes, warehouses are razed,
and he watches the loft apartments emerge.
The food trucks come. He parks beside them,
typing poems made to order out of his trunk. The
money flows in, crumpled and sweaty and
in one-dollar denominations. The Old Fashions
transfigure into Old English. And in his pocket
thesaurus he looks for a word. It’s not vagrant,
nor vagabond. It’s not homeless, nor wayward.
He lies in the long shadow of a Midwestern sunset,
starved and shaking. Up from the blackened
city shrubs comes an indifferent breeze and
just as he thinks the word Pauper, he dies one
on the corner of 23rd and Western.
sage short Dec 2015
the music that made me
feel in love stopped
halting my eyes on
his dreaming body
I could still hear
the noise of a run-down car,
his steady breaths muffled
under my chest as he
slept on my lap,
and my heart was
beating for him,
as the music started again
touka Sep 2018
wind soughs outside
slightly

I'm up late tonight

my sister careens
on the eastern coast
touches Topsail
with her lacy fingers

and I cross mine

wheels and wheels
like lockstep men
march inland
automobiles whine
like soon, treelines

I'm up so late

my best friend dreams
in the wayside,
somewhere west of me
after a long day
of convincing her boyfriend
to high-tail his *** out of Raleigh
Clayton, it is
he decided
her fret only calmed enough to sleep
by his promises of a high-rise property
and below 70 mile wind speeds

I can feel my eyelids tug

my brother's fingers thrum
on countertops
well-wishes in morse
as he says he'll stop thinking about it, now
no, wait... now

and my mother works to bend
each emerging frown

as my fingers drum up natural disaster nonsense
I watch, wait for the earth's recompense
as it surely blares through my old house's fence

rippling through the silhouette of the statue
my sister's soul had attached itself to

every crevice of county road
every man-hiked piedmont mile
interstices of feet and snow
the dirt that has seen every trial
to fail under inclement weather

they say it's overdue
that it's been a while
dazzling or desolate
×
be safe out there, please
JD Apr 2015
Laying in bed, texting you all night.
the funny thing was, we'd never fight.
I remember the day, and what you looked like
back when we'd both say, how we feel.

I have so little now
most pictures are gone.
But I still have a sign,
Welcome to Wilmington

You see I'm here
and I don't wanna go away
I'm literally trying to think of what to say.

You're my best friend and more
you were always here, when I hit the floor
But one day you're gone
and I had to get back up

It was so long
there were days of almost giving up
not that I wanted to
but for what it looked, I was scared.

You can make me happy
pretty much anywhere.
I can be alone,
and wait for you

It's been so long
I have nothing to lose.
Because it's you I love
the one I choose.

If you could see
I won't let you lose.

Things are different then they were before
I'm not always the same
I grew up for sure.

I'll respect you no matter what you chose.
I'll help you when you think you're gonna lose.

I just don't want to be used
and I'm not gonna force you to pick a dude.

I just hope the answers come clear
for I already know what I want my dear.
a velveteen grey cat
   crossed to Las Palmas
   and chose a corner table
   basking in a tsunami of
Sunlight
   while piccolo birds and
   winter water gardens
   sent morse code warnings
   through the air
reporting on the
   bombing of Wilmington
      sinking of the Titanic
         assassination of the Archduke
Qualyxian Quest Aug 2019
encounters, strangers, gifts that come
I pay it forward, but who’s it from?
           credo quia absurdum
Antino Art May 2018
The complexity of notes
Chet Baker hits
a rainy morning downtown with
match the rise and fall
of rooftops,
the streams created by gutters

He traces the city's architecture
against the grey sky
with the wind from his trumpet-
there, outside a corner cafe on Hargett and Wilmington,
trumpet case open,
playing for passerby.

I take my morning coffee
studying Chet,
him putting notes in my head
through wired earphones,
Me writing them all down.
Eh Nov 2013
Another late night awakening
And once again more thoughts of you
More thoughts of the lover that now has a new lover
More thoughts of a girl that I can't be with in Wilmington or Georgia or Dallas
More thoughts of your blue skin as it touched mine as you felt lifeless
More thoughts of the things I loved in high school that now don't mean much to me
More thoughts of you ringing the doorbell and I still haven't let you in after all these years
More thoughts of nothing new to say with old friends
More thoughts of only being able to write late at night
I think I'll finally open the door for you now
Goodnight.
Qualyxian Quest Dec 2018
gratitude a practice
to counter that the fact is

life is catastrophic
and our minuscule biopic

is quickly soon forgotten
the virtues and the rotten

to oblivion returns
and yet my soul within me burns

tonight I’m grateful for the ocean
and for my sons - devotion

in darkness sets the sun
and now our day is done
Qualyxian Quest Apr 2021
Platonic contemplation
        e.e. elevation
         instantiation
Qualyxian Quest Nov 2019
The job of the artist
Is always to deepen the mystery
So said Francis Bacon

I think Bruce Springsteen
Agrees
I wonder if my book he’s taken?
Qualyxian Quest Nov 2019
religion is not rational, she wrote
but it does tend to form patterns

if its madness floats your boat
it might even make your back burn

Joan of Arc is mysterious
Her integrity an absolute

What were those voices she heard
To make her that resolute?

A teenage girl with an army
The heroine of France

Fr. Greeley truly loved her
At his funeral - the Lord of the Dance!
Qualyxian Quest Aug 2019
meaningful coincidence
or at least meaningful for me

amidst the chaotic mess
and intense anxiety

not sure exactly why
weird curiosity

message to decode?
but who has eyes to see?

could she?
Qualyxian Quest Aug 2021
It's early afternoon
My 3 at play in the surf
Sunlight on the waves
Sunlight in their smiles
Laughter
I stand knee deep
In the Pacific Ocean
Buckets full of sand
How I wish
How I wish
How I wish
I didn't have to let this day go.
Qualyxian Quest Jan 2020
Providence is ambiguous
The Divine remains Unknown

I travel states contiguous
She wakes within the Twilight Zone

Imaginary or real?
She claims it now is both

Just to do the best I can
Als Ick Kan still - by my troth!
Qualyxian Quest Jan 2020
Bought it
But had to bring it back
Needed gas money to get home

Are aliens
Among us
In an afternoon all alone?
Qualyxian Quest Nov 2019
the past isn't dead
it isn't even past

William Faulkner, writer
Dr. King, free at last

Coastal Carolina
Wilmington, the Mass

cosmic coincidence
poems privately I pass


                 Ridin' on the Backstreets
            I bet the music will be badass!
Qualyxian Quest May 2020
Those British bad boys
The Rolling Stones

Sympathy for the Devil
Wild Horses roam

I'm Hitch Hikin'
Calling home

Blue Jays game
Toronto's dome

Berkeley deer
I cry and moan

American Cosmic
Twilight Zone

Both imaginary and real
My mind blown
Qualyxian Quest Jan 2020
standing in the pounding surf
       the boys at play
             sunlight!
Qualyxian Quest Jun 2020
Unattended funerals
Untended graves

Time tick tocks on
Nothing does it save

I'm up late again
But I do not rave

That day knee deep in ocean
My children in the waves!

                       Sunlight!
preservationman Jul 2023
Peter Pan
The Magic, Adventure, Entertainment and numerous surprises
A character of pure fun
Peter Pan is never out done
Disney made it all possible in create
Perhaps it was simply fate
Children of all ages enriched
Adults who the saw all the amazes
Peter Pan goes beyond any movie screen
You will understand actually what I mean
Peter Pan fame gained even more distinction through Peter Pan Bus Lines
The Peter Pan name now was a people moving motorcoach
No way in comparison to a stagecoach
Highway all the way
Even to this day
Peter Pan Bus lines gets his history from New England
A place known as Springfield, Massachusetts
The countryside, Hills, Lakes and the beauty that makes New England
Peter Pan Bus Lines is part of it all
It all echoes Peter Pan
The ride and comfort
Timetable
Peter Pan Bus lines, a motorcoach still able
Years was its start long before I was born
The time frame was somewhere in the 1900’s
Planning in what Peter Pan Bus Lines would become
Peter Pan Bus lines being a traveling road warrior
The pictures of Peter Pan, Captain Hook and many other characters on the side of Peter Pan Buses for the passengers to admire and think like a kid in their day
Captain Hook is always on good behavior
Just beware of the sword, you never know what Captain Hook is thinking
Now Peter Pan Bus Lines has expanded into New York City, Wilmington, DE, Baltimore, MD and Washington, DC
Peter Pan himself will always be present by way of the front, side and back of bus
Peter Pan Bus Lines being the journey of recline and relax
Forget your troubles and don’t feel perplexed
Away our time went
Thanks for Disney for making a time spent
Just imagine and always dream
Journey on mates
Qualyxian Quest Sep 2019
nightdrive to Wilmington beach
                 breaking with the white waves
                                  morning light
Qualyxian Quest Aug 2019
Wilmington willing?
           the cosmic is thrilling
                        Berkeley instilling ...


                            perceived?
Qualyxian Quest Aug 2019
Wilmington and Rice
     if I send, I send twice
               waiting for...
Qualyxian Quest Feb 2023
Let it be ambiguous
God only knows
Uptown movies in Charlotte
Wilmington UFOs

Keep her calm collected
Give her Singer Sargent
Emails of assistance
Remember Reno snows

Mother Mary's smile
Comfort in my fear
Courage to the end
Please let Alex hear

          3 dear deer
Qualyxian Quest Feb 2023
UFOs, what are those?
But now they get shot down
Everybody knows
I am the newsboy of this town

Diana Walsh Pasulka
Wilmington, UNC
American Cosmic
I read it cosmically

My roommate in Hong Kong
My cousin in Bangalore
Last lone American Night
4044

First the spiritual battles
Then technology
Our Lady of the Harbor
Beauty Baltic Sea

              silent plea
Qualyxian Quest Feb 2019
walking near Wilmington
       quiet beach, misty rain
         football to throw away pain ...

                        my son and I
                      memories remain
Qualyxian Quest Oct 2019
synchronicities happen all the time
for those with eyes to see

I watch, and wait, and wonder
pray to Let it Be!

think I'll drive to Wilmington
walk the campus, see the sea

do you think she read my poems?
on purpose or coincidentally?
Qualyxian Quest Feb 2020
Markson in the morning
Aliens at noon

Should I drive to Wilmington?
Sending poems soon

Painting in the evening
Probably Flaming June

Twilight then true darkness
Crazy as a loon

Stars shine on in silence
Trappist 1 in tune?

— The End —