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Cyril Blythe Aug 2012
Tonight I learned what it means to be mortal. To have a fifteen year dream crushed publicly. To smile and be the man that lies, “it’s ok, God has better plans and I trust that.” Tonight my wings were clipped and I was sentenced to a life of soil and toil, forever forced to watch the eagles in orange soar in the clouds and sky that I know I was created to own. I love this place because it is more of a home than I have ever known. It is pure and navy and orange and majestic. I wanted to serve it and glorify my king and this institution. Alas, no. Not I but the vultures. How is it that carrion dominate? How is it that prestige trumps passion? How is it that title and gold trump heart and integrity? I lost respect for my home. I feel as if a stranger in my own walls. I gave more than sweat and blood and tears yet they were swept under the carpet to rot. Fester and rot. I hope my passion and time as leader was well spent, it was and always was for you, tiger, not me! Always! I sharpened your claws and defended your teeth until they ****** me. Why. This is not how it is supposed to be. I pray this love and three year passion was not for non. Not for me, not for nametags or orange jackets, not for titles or for comfort but for passion and unbridled love of the institution which ****** me have I served. I have yet to work through what I’ve learned through this but tonight I know a chapter has ended and it hurts. It’s not that the chapter ended and a period was placed and the next began, it’s the end of the climactical chapter and the next pages are blank. Existent, yes. But blank. And the white on the page pales in comparison to orange and blue. I hate white and it’s idle uncertainty. I hold the pen but tonight my hand was severed, my limbs they rot, and my heart is numb. I am jello and I am free. And I hate, with every inth of my fibrous being, this freedom. I miss my chains.
A Woman of Many Words

I am a Woman of Many Words
I am drawn to all those places
        That words congregate:
                 Libraries and bookstores
                       Road signs and billboards
                             Ticket stubs and subtitles
                                    Nametags and license plates
Each one a journey driving inside me
I am a Woman of Many Words
I love the way the shapes feel in my mouth
The skittle taste of syllables
I am drawn to especially long words
With their phonetic entities stretching out like tentacles to reach new corners of pronunciation
Words like
              Bibliophile and flippant-irreverence
                      Evanescent and Insouciance
      Mellifluous and Effervescent
                                       Mondegreen and Labyrinthine
Words like
Onomatopoeia and Tintinnabulation
I appreciate their weight on my tongue
The way my hands appreciate the thickness that is a fat book
I am a Woman of Many Words
I am attracted to their multitude
The space their figures take up on a page
The calligraphic punches
Typed up by keys
The carefully constructed
Brush strokes
Spouting
What is sure to be, nonsense
But I do enjoy the sound of nonsense in the morning
I am a Woman of Many Words
I cling to the lettered skyscrapers wherever I can find them
Because the familiar scent of scribbles across parchment is comfort food for me
I find them
On the backs of cereal boxes
And in Popsicle riddles
In fortune cookies
And alphabet soup
From magnets on my fridge
To junk food logos
And I hold on to them for dear life
For fear that silence should find me
And leave me empty
For fear it will take away the music of maracas
Made by words
Dancing the salsa inside me

I am a Woman of Many Words
because Words
Answer my Questions,
Soothe my fears,
and Humor my Whims
They are not always Right
But they are always Constant
They are not always Honest, in fact,
Mostly
They Lie
But ever so often
They tell such a Beautiful Lie
That you wish it were true
They sing from the rocks
offering Escape from
Terrifying,
Suffocating,
Mind numbing Silence
that echoes off my skeleton
I am afraid that silence will hollow out my insides
and leave me abandoned
with nothing between my Bow and Stern
my Forecastle all torn up
I am afraid of the skeleton inside me
So I am a Woman of Many of Words
For fear of silence
And contempt for truth
Because my words are sirens
And my shipwreck is home here
brandon nagley May 2015
Pepper heat moisturized to cayenne treats, quite a tale you can speaketh of when the barrel's gone your way,
Thine heart burns, and stomach churns, to fabric of hand made clay!

Exodus routes will temp the ill-hearted, the still guarded wear patches all sown on!!! Collect all thy pleasures, for you've sown all your sins....

Unjust you say? All mental, none okay? What a disturbing image of Castro like fear's!!!

Oxidations own filing cleans thy palate, pass keys to and in between bricked mortar!!!!state borders with trooper's to seize full control!!!!

What a fool we all were to be told!!!!

Waiting is far more intense than what you have been made to believe, the sky plans to decieve all who gave its futuristic view!!! Some flights are old, and some are new!!

For art thou in a trance?

Have they left thine wounds open?

Are have thou been lanced?

Are you vulnerable to groupie teams, to hustler phenes?
Who rob God's own ark.....
Soleil Laboy May 2012
Stomach churning as I'm filled with uncertainty,
the black ball in my chest pumps out nothing but anxiety.
I hate that you are so far from me.
But what can I do or say to make everything ok?
Nothing but walk down the street like everything’s fine,
when deep down I’m raging inside.
The time spent goes by and I keep telling myself don’t cry.
When the memories are buried in the sand,
and you are no longer holding my hand,
I will shut my eyes real tight
and let my mind take flight.
Releasing all the taped up wounds,
saying that you came and went too soon.
Give me the stern nod and angry shove one last time,
give me one more kiss and a final "your mine".
We’re animals locked away
slowly and steadily losing our faith,
with only a few trips to the liquor store on eighth.
With loud tambourines and pretty pink scarves,
I’ll drink and **** to hide these scars.
No more is the hobo fabulous look golden
because our potential and chance has been stolen .
All because a girl caught the green eyed monster inside of her
so those around us concur,
that we're too ****** up to be eggs and cats,
When as a matter of fact…we know better than that.
With fingers in places where they shouldn’t be,
underneath blankets so nobody can see,
what we do during mornings at the park
and we're kissing underneath the arch
and I smile as we dance in the dark.
Loud sounds erupting from the TV and
comparing special videos to you and me.
Yummy cold cut sandwiches and sober ***...
we didn't know what was to come next.
We never drove to Harlem for a hug
but we tried our best to show each other love.
Running away from "hospital bound trains"
we can see and hear from miles away.
The sirens come closer...
You say "u got 5 minutes or its over".
Quickly get dressed and get out.
Leaving today is not what this was about.
Birthday ***** sips ...I always loved your beer flavored lips.
You weren’t there for guacamole dip,
but I’m glad because u would have gotten sick.
Nametags and tears,
unable to sleep because of murderous fears.
Late night walks to Houston Street with 50 million bags,
You looking like a turtle sitting by that garbage can,
and a free bottle of whiskey because of the Spanish speaker in me.
Pimps and lesbians watching my hands
as they make there was into your pants.
Yelling grandmothers and pregnant *******,
I think I would have needed stitches that day
but you put yourself in the way.
Free mozzarella sticks and putting up with cops and their *******.
You may have made me chip my tooth *******,
but you were still one of my best lovers.
Kids running into glass windows thinking they are tunnels
to arguing about how much beer we can funnel.
Both wanted trailers growing up but now we're too busy throwing up….
"4 loko crazy" mornings and me drinking too much despite your warnings.
Emergency room visits of heartbreak and torture…
Let’s get the **** out of here..."we don’t need to be sober"…
Angry sisters at the park and you telling me to go home...
but I just couldn’t leave u all alone.
The apparent "Sid and Nancy" of 2010 is falling apart
we can no longer pretend.
If you want it back fight fierce and loud,
I’ve never given up I’m just waiting around.
The nights of ***** and **** will remain forever intact…
including all the nights you fought and had my back.
We've made plans to go here and there but never get to,
it’s not really fair..
but it’ll be alright
and maybe one day we’ll ride a magic carpet,
into the infamous supermarket,
and u won’t try stealing 8 four lokos…
that would turn us into psychos.
Watching the sunrise sipping a 40,
in preparation of being lonely while I go eat brunch with my mom
only to come back and everything’s wrong.
Peace necklaces and stolen first time flowers.
Laughing at jokes in my own shower.
Making my closet your room but we spoke too soon.
Light up starfish and darkened anguish.
I can’t believe we did all this ****.
There's a pile of your clothes on my floor,
remember the funny hat and purple bathrobe outside my door?
And the running
and the laughing
and the playing
and the fighting
and the screaming
and the crying
and the love
and the hugs
and the kisses
and refrigerator/bathtub
and the time you were at McDonalds when u got lonely and came to find me with all the bags.
I stopped rhyming but I don’t give a ****.
Don’t try to understand me...just love me...is what u wrote.
And I did that’s why you’re getting this note.
In time we've gone thru hell and back.
We've made memories that will last.
Just please don’t leave so fast...
I don’t want a guy like you in my past...
Frankie Jan 2013
Under supervision of the sun, his fingertips are full of love;
when he lives with the moon, hands form fists, the doors and walls have holes—
muscles catch fire:

trying to force infantilization,
sticking nametags to every available swatch of fabric hanging
from her bony frame.

Her skin is peeling like dried paint curls from the wall.
She brushes it down like pushing
up her sleeves, feigning
a tough exterior.

The bathroom door explodes: her palm
is to her mouth; four horse pills
sit uncomfortably on her squirming tongue—
fatalist palmistry.
A single blow to her thoracic spine
(vertebra seven through nine, to be precise)
and the tile floor is medicated with
slimy, secondhand acetaminophen.

Pale worn flesh meets rug burn between
the bathroom and the walk-in closet where
she will huddle on the floor, shaking,
shuddering,
tiny bones ready to crack—

strong arms wrap around and pull her close.
Frail child-size hands catch hundreds of tears ‘till
one big, calloused mitt takes over.

His hand is to her little pink lips and
a tiny cold something tries to find a way in—
epiphany:

she greedily devours the lonely pill and
begs for the other three quarters
of her suicide.

Cynical laughter denies her pleas;
her lungs rip stale air from
mothball collections stored upon the shelves,
from shirts hanging stiffly,
buttoned,
ready for action that never comes,
from pants that lay lazily across
cheap plastic hangers.

She siphons O2 with her windpipe:
heaving sobs, obnoxious wailing, disgusting, guttural noises,
black mascara tire tracks—
she would swear on anything that her ribs were going to give.

****
*****
****
*****
*******
stupid
******


Hazy home-video recordings on loop in her brain, the words
pound her body like hail and
the memories won’t leave. They’re bleeding
from her ears and eyes and her assailant stares on,
irritated.

“Drama queen,” he reminds her.

Same as always, she cries
herself sick, he tucks
her into bed. Morning sunshine
shows bruises and she hides them
in her sweater.

Another flimsy paper hospital accessory, more
radiology tech jokes about her clumsy
hands, her butter-fingers.

And when asked her name, there’s
hesitation
‘cause she’s got to remember which nametag
he let her wear today.
JP Goss Dec 2018
The last of the angels’
Castaway nametags
Hung from the plush red edges
Of the art deco interior.
A breeze from the open door
Cast the doctor’s pamphlets to the floor
Advertising his services
For the special remediation program
Since he could not sleep
What with all the voices
From below chanting his name—
How he envied the people he killed:
For they were spoken so little of.
That is, except for on his intake sheet:
After passing over the names,
Seven in all,
Whose lives were, shameless,
Shed over ***,
The latch clicked
And out came the doctor’s hand
Beckoning through the door
A “come hither” gesture.
On the couch he sat,
Neck conforming perfectly to the couch
As he swam a cascade of Rorschachs
Apart the mirror-faced, owl-like man.
Speaking with a heavy Eastern-European accent
He knew exactly why Elliot had come:
Perhaps the intentions were dubious,
Perhaps he was looking
For quick solutions;
Regardless, Mirror-Face was there to help:
Too easily, these days, was it
To determine dysfunction in the masculine—
And this case was rare,
Awash in chatter from below.
So, there must be something deeper
Rooted in fear of perpetual
Romance fetishism
And absence of its referent.
Yes! The penetrative is missing—
The limerant object
Is without form, shapely, and feminine
And would forever escape him,
In part by suicide,
In part by isolation.
The reason you are here
Is the absent-present offspring
Of such missing ***,
A veritable porcupine-dilemma
In the flesh, a show of insufficient ****** capital—
See now in this face of mine.
Yes, now that I’ve diagnosed
What ails
Let us explore what solutions
Could have been:
The living world does offer suitable surrogates
For those lacking—
Recognizing this is the first step
To being forgotten,
To allow you to sleep.
Yes, you recognized then
The gun as the extension of the phallus
And it levels the playing field
Raised up, aroused by power
One feels when operating heavy machinery—
Yes, all flesh which is the metaphorical egg,
The bullet is the *****,
Which penetrates the flesh of the paramour
Impregnating her with life inverted
And creates, in death,
The child of ****** frustration.
While this child is one of children lost,
It is child nonetheless.
Yes, and this gun, the metal *****,
***** not one
But many—in fact, incestuously,
It ***** entire families,
Entire communities,
And leaves their lives gravid
With your legacy.
Yes, it is the only way to create
The ultimate matron, the universal feminine,
The supreme m-Other
For the Supreme Gentleman.
And you, as you see me,
Are the absent-present of this child of death
This union of bullet-***** and the whole-body womb,
With which you, sadly, impregnated yourself.
But, here’s the secret,
Because of this, you can only do damage control:
Your child will prevail.
Yes, the name may be gone, but the child prevails.
Name may be gone, but child prevails.
Name gone, child here.
So, have the voices stopped?
Has the child matured in you?
You are on your way to being forgotten,
But the child lives on:
Yes, the name may be gone, but the child prevails.
Name may be gone, but child prevails.
Name gone, child here.
Guns are bad--but why are we attracted to them? Why do men **** women?
Phoebe Jan 2015
a home of unrest survives in my old town where
madness seeps through jaundice colored halls,
lapping life from rotted brains.

grim photos of grandchildren
deform walls,
but old folks don’t remember.
they wear nametags.
who am i? residents wail
for mommy, their ’86 kitten,
a bus pass from chicago or
the wrong god.

her eyes are sallow.
tunnel vision, they say.
cloudy hues without purpose.
bags under gramma’s lids hang
          like dead gangsters
and bifocals settle around her neck,
in case she gains a pang
              of clarity.

Lovely Rita,
once a fat cook is now slender as a fang.
she forgets to eat.

my guttural granny, she stutters
incoherent, mostly.
but today, she babbles
        an omen.

watch o u t
      thing s are
    g o nn a
h h h appen
  
she retreats,
deteriorating.
Em Glass Oct 2018
I'm thinking of events that require name tags.
The first day of camp. College visits, and orientations.
Conferences. Mock United Nations.
I'm thinking of hearing parties through glass
and turning the fan on for the noise.
I'm thinking of trying to think about boys.
I'm thinking of driving from Illinois
to Indiana to Ohio and watching the terrain
stay the same. I'm thinking the check
engine light is on. And I should get a new
lock for the back door. And fill out a W-4.
I'm thinking of how intense a crush
would feel to a binary star.
I'm thinking of the oceans people are.
I'm thinking, what is it with poets
and the sky?
Why do people hide? How many strokes
can I take without a breath?
What other kinds of sentences are there?
Are we there yet?
When I bought food today, the guy behind the counter said,
"How's your weekend?" and "Have a good day, Nick."
My response was, "You as well." And I really meant it. I couldn't believe he read Nickolas on my I-card, assumed people call me Nick, (which they do), and called me Nick.
I left and I thought to myself, "I'm like him."
I love connecting with people. I want to not be afraid to talk personally with people who I don't know personally. I just want to dive in.
I want to read nametags and after the wonderful young lady at Starbucks gives me my change for my Grande Caramel Machiato, I'd say, "Thanks Sara. Have a great day". She might look at me and say "Thanks! You as well! :)" Or she might say, "Thanks...you too o_O"
Does it matter?
When you give someone your love, even if it's just a milliliter, especially if it's just a milliliter, do they have to like it? Do they have to reciprocate it?
Do those people who always smile and are full of love prefer their lovees to be put off by their kindness, making the lover superior because they have more love than the lovee could ever imagine?

It's just that love has to be selfish. There must be something to gain.
I love people and I never got out of that phase of when you're a child and you think everyone is perfect and they know what they're doing.

See, I cognitively now realize that people are just as lost as me, but emotionally, I feel that everyone else is on a level above me and I am a few levels down. In terms of how much love I deserve, how much attention I deserve.

I love seeing other people happy. But me? I could do without it. It's immaterial.

So when other people love, it's lovey love, it's happiness love, it's the love that's in the air, the love that makes you hold open doors, the love that makes you human.

When I love, it's the love that makes you write letters, the love that's begging for attention, looking for approval, trying to dominate others, trying to be human.

I want to be just like you. If I could treat myself how I treat you, I might be happier.

You can love something and not care about taking care of it. You can love something and let it go. You can love yourself and let yourself go.

It's really bad but I want to share this with others because my artwork might help someone someday and it helps me and that's cool, but knowing that everything I produce might someday make someone's life better even if it's just for one second, then it's worth it. It's extremely worth it.

So I want to be like that guy who works at that place. Someone who cares. And underneath all of that "I deserve way less than other people" emotional nonsense that plagues my neurons, I am.
Attempt at Slamish poetry, sort of a love letter to myself? Lol hope you enjoy
Em Glass Sep 2016
The sun is setting in slant
rhymes and readings, outlining
the pride poets who stand in
front of the window in gold

thread. Those who listen
eat and laugh at their RESERVED
tables until the end of the catered
event, when the flag is draped

over the piano to soak up
a patch of dust and the
sun reaches to steady itself
on the horizon and the sky

purples— sometimes indifference
leaves a bruise.

Rainbow stickers and flags fade
to dusk hues as they
are folded into a Whole
Foods canvas

bag, minimizing space taken,
and nametags are peeled
off black shirts and blue jeans,
the lint sticking to the backs

of the names in the trash. The
sun ducks behind a mountain.
Colored stripes, prism rainbows
masked. Sweeping the floor. No
one is outlined anymore.
Pranjal Singh May 2021
Deep under the hiding places
Lurking around dark abyss
Quiet hallways,
A little stroll with self doubts
Dancing along loneliness
Is there no one available
For help hours?

Do you notice few beings
The same ones as I do
Wearing costumes and nametags
Everyone seems lost
Lost in love,
With the idea
Of being in love.

Where's the road to
Simple and normal?
Where's the button to
Happy and rewind?
What about the time
When there was no solving
The big mystery
Of complicated miseries.

Close your eyes,
Just a moment to heal
Do you see the same beings?
Just without the costumes
Do you see through them
No need of the nametags?
No black and white
The dark abyss gone
Sailed back to
The light and dawn.

-pranj.

— The End —