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"detonators" poems
keep the photographs the city is overexposed again take more walks in the nearby woods the world we knew as children watch out for frogs and detonators mind the wires new aerial boundaries at dawn no one steps inside by choice adapt to the proper order and no sleeping under tables the reflection tower is a good place to start tourist trap, a certain approximate bring the thing under the couch in case of an unexpected visitor more nightmares cut out of the newspaper what is an Astra 600? three different hat sizes Hannie says yes to ménage à trois the joy in discovery the joy in forgetting like God without a compass not a lot, just forever
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Jan 2, 2023
Jan 2, 2023 at 11:32 AM UTC
Excerpts from Various Notes Strewn About the Bedroom of Freddie and Truus Oversteegen, October 1, 1941
I was busy placing detonators under the MIRROR FUN HOUSE, pitching piveting images of itself for and by itself, when I heard over the rusting intercom the main fuses were being turned off for a routine check up and I would be again left, as every one is, every night, in the dark and all the better. The bombs in my pockets reminded me they were awake and impatient or otherwise alive; otherwise, their life, like mine, wouldn’t growing steadily shorter. The ferris wheel in the distance without my glasses a slowly rotating flower of blinks; I wished I could hear the pistons the generator understand whatever is making that Big Wheel turn but instead I sliced at the end of the plastic ends of my explosives to make them a little more homely and different and mine. I looked up into the rectangle framing my face while behind me a rectangle framed the back of my head framing the front of my face framing the back of my head framing the front of me. I ran my fingers through the wires petting them something pretty then wished I could hang this night above my kitchen sink, just above my rubber plants, as good luck for the future, the wishbone of my gratitude. Instead I pushed some dirt with my fingertips purposefully without reason then let the wire follow me from my back pocket, leading the way for the end like I would lead a be-speckled French bulldog, if ever I would give in and purchase such a friend. I walked some distance I don’t dare guess and laid my body against a tree, I hope an Oak tree, the roots coddling my thighs and I can see my breathe in the darkness and I thought of the spinning, blinking stars. I took the detonator from my boot and before I pressed the don’t press red button I glanced over my shoulder wondering why I should make it, before, presto, everything shattered, every light seared the sky in a final collision with it’s end sister in the falling dark and every piece of my face and body leap from the ground with it, flying into a place the darkness seemed much brighter from here and I was happy someone had left the light on for me.
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Oct 8, 2011
Oct 8, 2011 at 9:19 PM UTC
3, 2, 1
I was busy placing detonators under the MIRROR FUN HOUSE, pitching piveting images of itself for and by itself, when I heard over the rusting intercom the main fuses were being turned off for a routine check up and I would be again left, as every one is, every night, in the dark and all the better. The bombs in my pockets reminded me they were awake and impatient or otherwise alive; otherwise, their life, like mine, wouldn’t growing steadily shorter. The ferris wheel in the distance without my glasses a slowly rotating flower of blinks; I wished I could hear the pistons the generator understand whatever is making that Big Wheel turn but instead I sliced at the end of the plastic ends of my explosives to make them a little more homely and different and mine. I looked up into the rectangle framing my face while behind me a rectangle framed the back of my head framing the front of my face framing the back of my head framing the front of me. I ran my fingers through the wires petting them something pretty then wished I could hang this night above my kitchen sink, just above my rubber plants, as good luck for the future, the wishbone of my gratitude. Instead I pushed some dirt with my fingertips purposefully without reason then let the wire follow me from my back pocket, leading the way for the end like I would lead a be-speckled French bulldog, if ever I would give in and purchase such a friend. I walked some distance I don’t dare guess and laid my body against a tree, I hope an Oak tree, the roots coddling my thighs and I can see my breathe in the darkness and I thought of the spinning, blinking stars. I took the detonator from my boot and before I pressed the don’t press red button I glanced over my shoulder wondering why I should make it, before, presto, everything shattered, every light seared the sky in a final collision with it’s end sister in the falling dark and every piece of my face and body leap from the ground with it, flying into a place the darkness seemed much brighter from here and I was happy someone had left the light on for me.
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We can manage a dull afternoon When punished lilies Imitate the army of rebel waters Sneaking away on tiptoe From an empire of lawful soil Watchful of flood signals We will wait for a jealous wasp To peel back the detonators For springboard demolitions Fancied on limp petals While soldiers of nectar’s plight Talk over plans with bees We see an enemy of discreet magnitude Inside us, a showering of infernal degrees Our hearts soaked in criminal teas
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Nov 10, 2014
Nov 10, 2014 at 4:52 PM UTC
Fevers Spun a Garden
We can manage a dull afternoon When punished lilies Imitate the army of rebel waters Sneaking away on tiptoe From an empire of lawful soil Watchful of flood signals We will wait for a jealous wasp To peel back the detonators For springboard demolitions Fancied on limp petals While soldiers of nectar’s plight Talk over plans with bees We see an enemy of discreet magnitude Inside us, a showering of infernal degrees Our hearts soaked in criminal teas
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Jan 29, 2015
Jan 29, 2015 at 12:56 PM UTC
Fevers Spun a Garden
They told me what didn't **** me would make me stronger. They lied. What didn't **** me made me damaged, Defective, unable to function at "acceptable" levels. Traumatic experiences didn't build some great wall to fortify my resolutions in life Instead, they shook my foundations with ferocity, Slashing cracks down my walls, crumbling rooms to rubble They planted bombs for later, Little surprises once the aftershocks faded With triggers tucked away safe, wrapped up like gifts. No, what didn't **** me made me want to disappear Over, and over, and over. And even almost 7 years later, There are still detonators being uncovered. Sure, now I know the paths to avoid The piles of broken memories, loneliness, and displacement To keep out of sight. And still, There are some days, but mostly nights When the bombs go off in succession And I have to bring myself back from the dark Over. And over. And over. And there are some nights Where I'm the one holding the switch I'm the one willing my world to explode into shrapnel. And someone else has to bring me back Over. And over. They lied. What doesn't **** you doesn't make you stronger, It makes you a survivor, even if you sometimes don't want to survive. And it leaves you with the scars every survivor bears, Seen and unseen.
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Jul 27, 2017
Jul 27, 2017 at 11:59 PM UTC
What didn't **** me made me have nights like this.
Who quiets the detonators song who stills the beast within he wills the refuting wrong, the ill he feels a lance pierces longing to wrong as its victor rides away alone outer places no one calls home another victim will rise again reeling in my pain, until he falls spilling innocent blood, colder then the darkness wading in heart flooding my breath, I'am breathless as useless as death warmed over I no longer feel the sun or wind or a siren bleating in the grasses she dares me come, die in my arms for I am soft and wanting your cares fold your fears into me for I am not she quiets me, so with it my tears BB2015
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Mar 14, 2015
Mar 14, 2015 at 11:47 AM UTC
In The Grasses
We can manage a dull afternoon When punished lilies Imitate the army of rebel waters Sneaking away on tiptoe From an empire of lawful soil Watchful of flood signals We will wait for a jealous wasp To peel back the detonators For springboard demolitions Fancied on limp petals While soldiers of nectar’s plight Talk over plans with bees We see an enemy of discreet magnitude Inside us, a showering of infernal degrees Our hearts soaked in criminal teas
0
Dec 17, 2014
Dec 17, 2014 at 12:24 PM UTC
Fevers Spun a Garden
The red lines on his wrists don’t belong to him. Gun fires! Grenades! They drink coffee from a cup between glass doors. *he rubs the red patches away,              they still leave a slight stain.* “Mothers’! Come out into the streets!” The little children hold tiny daggers up to heaven blind, to the stars and oceans. Lost screams under rail tracks, their eyes twitch. “Mothers’! Come out into the streets!” See the blood of your children run down in streams. *the red patches on his hands fall in love;                                                   they became contagious.* Standing under a grey sky, on a ground marked with an X. He prays. Comrades become detonators, when the living start to die off. He prays. There are more bullets in the bodies than in guns. He still prays. (Orange is his favourite colour.) He sees a sunset before the dark invades.
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Jul 9, 2014
Jul 9, 2014 at 11:51 PM UTC
Bleeding Salt
We can manage a dull afternoon When punished lilies Imitate the army of rebel waters Sneaking away on tiptoe From an empire of lawful soil Watchful of flood signals We will wait for a jealous wasp To peel back the detonators For springboard demolitions Fancied on limp petals While soldiers of nectar’s plight Talk over plans with bees We see an enemy of discreet magnitude Inside us, a showering of infernal degrees Our hearts soaked in criminal teas
0
Jun 26, 2015
Jun 26, 2015 at 2:01 PM UTC
Fevers Spun a Garden
We can manage a dull afternoon When punished lilies Imitate the army of rebel waters Sneaking away on tiptoe From an empire of lawful soil Watchful of flood signals We will wait for a jealous wasp To peel back the detonators For springboard demolitions Fancied on limp petals While soldiers of nectar’s plight Talk over plans with bees We see an enemy of discreet magnitude Inside us, a showering of infernal degrees Our hearts soaked in criminal teas
0
Dec 11, 2015
Dec 11, 2015 at 11:40 AM UTC
Fevers Spun a Garden
We can manage a dull afternoon When punished lilies Imitate the army of rebel waters Sneaking away on tiptoe From an empire of lawful soil Watchful of flood signals We will wait for a jealous wasp To peel back the detonators For springboard demolitions Fancied on limp petals While soldiers of nectar’s plight Talk over plans with bees We see an enemy of discreet magnitude Inside us, a showering of infernal degrees Our hearts soaked in criminal teas © Matthew Goff
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Nov 15, 2017
Nov 15, 2017 at 11:14 AM UTC
Fevers Spun a Garden
We can manage a dull afternoon When punished lilies Imitate the army of rebel waters Sneaking away on tiptoe From an empire of lawful soil Watchful of flood signals We will wait for a jealous wasp To peel back the detonators For springboard demolitions Fancied on limp petals While soldiers of nectar’s plight Talk over plans with bees We see an enemy of discreet magnitude Inside us, a showering of infernal degrees Our hearts soaked in criminal teas
0
May 4, 2016
May 4, 2016 at 12:13 PM UTC
Fevers Spun a Garden
We can manage a dull afternoon When punished lilies Imitate the army of rebel waters Sneaking away on tiptoe From an empire of lawful soil Watchful of flood signals We will wait for a jealous wasp To peel back the detonators For springboard demolitions Fancied on limp petals While soldiers of nectar’s plight Talk over plans with bees We see an enemy of discreet magnitude Inside us, a showering of infernal degrees Our hearts soaked in criminal teas
0
Jul 22, 2016
Jul 22, 2016 at 1:11 PM UTC
Fevers Spun a Garden