After days of hatred,
and days of sorrow
The book is closed,
no more time is borrowed

They didn't see it coming,
For they never do
This is the end,
I'm drowning in the water,
Doing flips and backbends,
No I'm not trying to get to surface
I choose not
I rather be left on the seafloor,
chained and locked

i've got a lump in my throat
that won't go away

and some tears in my eyes
that can't seem to sway

my hands won't stop trembling
as I sit here and sigh

from all the postcards stacked
by this window so high

but you haven't responded
so they haven't been sent

and so my anxiety
is all I have left

but these voices won't stop screaming
and this ceiling never ends

and this lump in my throat
keeps on doing big backbends

so please respond
before my landlord calls

telling me the neighbors
have been complaining

about these love letters
through the white drywall

We argue for what it's worth
We like to go back and forth,
say words we don't mean,
For there is hate in between

We talk behind each other's backs
For we both say "what kind of friend is that."
it both causes us to crack
One more step till it all turns black
For Our conscience is what we lack
We both don't hold back
For if its a smack of words or actions
It causes a ton of reaction

When the action is already said and done
The friendship we have is none,
As more hate has begun
We feel awful,
For this becomes a endless cycle

We both ask "why can't we stay friends."
But we don't want to continue doing backbends
For were both thinking it has to end,
We all say it ended in a way we didn't Intend
But the truth is
If we wouldn't have tried to have each other break and bend,
We would still be friends.

It hits you in the face,
It's an ordinary place
it's called reality
Indescribably cold,
Yet nobody knows until it
HITS
You used to be an innocent soul,
naïve as it gets

Seemingly sad how it had to turn this way,
Sitting down and praying
will never make reality go away
You think there's a way
You think pills and potions,
will help a naïve soul stay

Your brains caving in,
your doing backbends
You wonder how it could be any worse,
To you,
this seemingly a curse,
In this life You realized,
God doesn't take any mercy,
For souls who wouldn't dare to believe,
And who would doubt
One of many of his own creations
Gods just trying to tell you to believe
Not in him,
but your own self you see.

loss of ego immortal wound
loss of possessions
greed
identity
bohemian hallways crumble
souls escape through backbends
spiders build webs
as Lucy learns to walk on legs

an eye is opening
showing us as one
becomes infinity
escapes zero
precedes the binary
in the absence of (time)
the crucial slit makes here/there
omnipupil primes the present

3 6 9 ...
5 8 13 ...
17 19 23 ...
everything you want
nothing how it seems

Falling in love with danger
Falling backwards
Into that ugly spiral
All screaming and hiding
Drinking ***** water
Staring at the sun

I'm so melancholy I can barely breathe
Reliving hospital beds just to feel
That sickening pain
Chorded dreams
Of waking up in my own bed
Day after
I was supposed to be dead

Sick as a horse
It's so glamorous
To be broken
Mushrooms growing in my bones
Some disease
I can't treat
I can't go home

Flirting with friends
Pushing myself
Right to the edge
Of sanity
I'm married
To my mind's
Fatally broken backbends

Trapped in this funhouse
Do my makeup with my friends
In a funny mirror
We don't look human anymore
Dancing in my basement
Pretending that this parody
Is the party of my life