I was your cigarette - I gave you all of me
Until you decided I wasn't enough anymore
you threw me out
  
         And replaced me

i'm holding your breath
so you won't leave me
and i see you slowly suffocating 
i'm too selfish to let go
so instead i suffer with you
i feel your lungs straining
and i ask you to take me in
like i'm the last drag
of your last cigarette 
let me fill your collapsing lungs
the ones that are crumbling into each other
the way we did
i was always your nicotine
and you always knew 
i'd be the end of you
but you couldn't quit me
i always knew
this would end
i'm an addiction out of style
we always knew
we would consume each other
in the worst of ways
so i'll tear you apart
from the inside out
we've always known 
that the smoke in your lungs
has my name on it
i've become a disease
i guess that makes me cancer
or at least 
something just as vile
just as ruthless 
just as deadly
just as selfish 
at least you'll remember me
i guess that all describes me
and i guess the smoke 
describes you too
and it describes us
how we drifted into each other
stealing parts of one another
and setting off again
losing ourselves
but gaining new parts
and maybe the point
is losing yourself in another 
but if we're the smoke
then we're the cancer
we're just as vile
just as ruthless 
just as deadly
just as selfish

[holyoak]

She believes in benevolent strangers.
She believes in seclusion,
She believes in chaos and confusion.
She can see the light at the end of the tunnel.
Knowing that it's a mirage,
She happily believes in the disillusion.

She believes in dreams, she believes in hope.
Even when the situations are too difficult to cope.

She is bubbly. She talks a lot.
Of random things, Of vague thoughts.

She asks - "Who art thou?"
Can you connect to your darkest, blackest fantasies & thoughts?
Have you made a life for yourself where you can feel them, experience them?
I have . . .

I believe
and
I am crazy.
I see a picture to what seems hazy.
Yes, I am odd.
But, I am free . . .

In my country they say
You know you are in love
When you start
Acting against your own interest.
I confirm.

One day I will buy chocolate milk,
One day I will fly first class,
One day my shirts will be silk,
One day I’ll have a backstage pass.

I am accustomed to saying No
To things that would make me smile,
It’s not that I’m short on dough
But splurging just isn’t my style.

The waiter asks if I’d like a sundae,
Oh my, I couldn’t do that,
Perhaps I’ll have it one day
Because I don’t want to get fat.

This attitude long ago was learned
And strangely it has survived,
Trust me I’m deeply concerned
Why I am so often deprived.

I know I deserve the best,
And shouldn’t make life tougher,
I feel that I’m overly stressed,
And I don’t deserve to suffer.

Starting today I shall vow
To indulge my deepest desires,
To spoil myself I’ll learn how
Before my dull life expires.

I'm selfish
I can't bare to see you in the arms of another
I'm selfish
I crave the taste of your tongue
I'm selfish
I need your arms wrapped around me tight
I'm selfish
I hold you back from what you could become
I'm selfish
I won't let this end
I'm sorry
I'm too selfish to let you move on.

I've been collecting dust on the corners of my lips
Until the day you touched my
Hands, knees, shoulders, hips
Parts of me I kept in the dark
So no one can see how easy it is
To find me
And you found this
Mess that I am, that's left of me
And fixed it effortlessly
I allowed your existence
To staple itself into mine
Beautiful, tragic, perfect
Salvaged from my own anxieties
Cradled in the home you built with your arms
Around my waist.
I fell
I kept on falling
And you caught me, timely
Now I'm collecting stardust on the corners of my lips
Wishing you'd never tire
Of holding my hands, knees, shoulders, hips.