I was seven,
But it wasn't a toy passed through a gap in the fence by a hand
And a face unseen,
It was blood,
Blood pouring from my mouth and painting my shirt crimson
Staining the ground in puddles and rivers;
The terrified looks that the teachers wore
I was awake and alive and dying
They saw me dying,
And it must have been a dream because I couldn't feel pain,
But I still have the scars

I was seven when the child I knew was lost
But it wasn't growing up it was caving in and carving my pain in stone
As the buzzards circle
It was blood
My blood of disbelief that any god could let a curse as such exist
Painting my mind black only;
Fertile ground where the devil plays
I was cold and cruel and unfeeling
I was dying
For the very first time I was a man without a heartbeat,
But still with dreams

I was seven when the games I played could not be won
But it wasn't because the sky is never ending
It was confining limitations and clouds
It was blood
My blood boiling, my seething disposition, my nightmares
That taught me how to hate;
Emptiness being made full by poison
In my fingers and veins and my hurting heart
I was dying
Shouting obscenities to the heavens where no god was found
But still hoping he would hear

I was seven

The time of the shining of
Wind-summered grasses, has passed,
-To the lark-breast mottle-
The harvested skin of the
Senescent land

The candle-****** gutter of
Hurrying wing sees
The last of the coin
That was minted in thatches
Of deepwood
Of latticing bramble
Of crumbling eve.

The mourn of the Moorland
Has  feathered a will
With the clot of the Ash,
Where a heather of cinnabar
Freckles the splash of
a simmering tarn

As gravelling Easterlies
Peel the cling of
The verdigris fades,
Some twilight of sepia
Musters the pastel
of Wintering calm.

This feeling...
Heavy...
Like a wreath bearing down my neck.
Every fibre in me seem to be at loggerheads.

My heart...
Pounding.
Each beat is a hammer
sledging away at my saneness.

My breaths...
Premature and short.
Inconsistent.
I respire full but with punctured lungs.

Cruel was the fate
They gave me their hate
Any longer, I couldn't hold on
All the chains were withdrawn
So much hate, my heart choke
Inside me you arose, awoke
You took over my soul
My body under your control
You burnt me in your flame
I couldn't stay the same
My eyes wept blazing fire
Wrong choices of mine you admire
Serenity hid because of fear
I may hurt the ones that are my dear
Rage rage go far, only words I could say
Never come back any other day
You were powerful and so strong
I could have done something wrong
The symphony of destruction, the devil sent
I know this moment I'll repent
Over you, I feel so weak and powerless
So out of mind and senseless
My ruth fell on that day
I didn't heard the pleas they say
I could see, with fear they shiver
Hailing the devil, the pain giver
Forgiveness and mercy are lost
Took the revenge at my serenity's cost
What had you made me do
You were that dark, I never knew
Now you disappeared, inside me you are gone
I wish next time I'll hold on
The bloodshed remained in the barren battlefield
The time flew past, the past is sealed
And I'm here repenting, lost in grief
Crying a sorrowful momentarily relief