i'd seen it burning, it was me
the one who'd set it up.
i'd never tell, never be seen,
but always be around.
there was some beauty to it that
i couldn't really share.
The flame and i were different, but
both always gasped for air.
i've seen it taking, felt the fear
it's gotten me before.
yet somehow it would lure me in
and ask to feed it more.
it's made itself known on my skin,
gently dabbing my hands.
i always knew that we were kin,
i knew it understands.
a rapsody of life and death, a fable
so intriguing, you couldn't
picture warmth so fatal,
or love so unforgiving.
it didn't leave no silver scars,
no petty, goudy patches,
i'm just a never dying spark
trapped in a box of matches.

A constant craving
The laundry just sits and sits
The itch that won’t scratch

She repeats patterns she learned from home.
She is blinded by her actions.
Justifying what happened.
She’s the hurt one,
not them.
She knows the answers.
No one listens.
That’s her truth.
People leave.
They don’t agree.
She’s alone,
Saying, why me?
Until the pain is too great to change,
She’ll see herself as a victim,
and continue living the same.
Isolated.

I have to heal my inner wounds.
I have to face reality.
I contributed to this relationship. (Mess)
I feel remorse.
I am ashamed.
I’m ready to start,
and face my inner pain.
In time I see,
I am at peace.
Thank you, me,
Thank you for not giving up.

I am consumed by
negative spaces,
floating in between
death and the void,
looking for reason
that won't come
and there is no use
in running from darkness
when it's what brought us
here at birth
and the only thing
we part with in the dirt

If the way out is through,
why do they stay and
mock the despair
behind my eyelids?
They laugh as I search
for purpose that doesn't exist
in lieu of aliens that
I swear are real,
when reality has always been
my achilles heel

It's a dance of avoiding gravity
until inevitably strikes
a heavy blow
that life is
random circumstance
siphoning into black holes,
a collection of moments
that we will
forget to remember,
but how does one find peace
without answers?

Daylight starts peeking in
to see if I'm okay,
I disguise the sentiment
as irrelevant
when I could really use a break
from this carousel of fear
that only
wants me to want more
as if I am owed a life
that is somehow past due,
checked out by someone
who was less afraid
to step outside of their room

Sunlight omits
more concern over
reckless abandonment
as it greets my pacing force,
but there is no stopping
what was designed
without brakes,
carried by all the love and hate
that glorifies impulse to
sift through emptiness-
a sacrifice to this
blank screen
that consumes me with dread
over a deathless dream
stuck inside my head

Within every burned forest
lies a newly sprouting seed,
irreparable on the surface
is a cycle that is forgiving-
albeit wild and relentless
it moves in ways that cannot
be comprehended

In the essence of
a bleak rain danced sky
is life striving to renew:
nature needs no hand
from humans to thrive,
the answer to all of our squirming
is to simply re-align