i spend my days
pouring myself into the cups of others
only to find that
when it’s time for myself
to take a sip
all that’s left
in my cup
is the remainder of a girl
who gave too much
self care is extremely important. most days I fight my depression by putting smiles onto others faces, but forgetting about my once bright smile.
My vicious love acts out of fear
My vicious love acts out of pain
My vicious love seeks to be loved back
My vicious love is scared of the unknown
My vicious love is hurt and does what it can to protect me from more hurt
My vicious love causes me to become too involved too fast
My vicious love calls on my past to remind me why I love this way
My vicious love causes me to be lonely when I’m with the person I love
My vicious love causes me to cry over things that really don’t matter
My vicious love makes me worried all of the time
My vicious love makes me too prideful and act out of my lack of self confidence
My vicious love will ruin you too
So run before my vicious love loves you
Between the lines
of now and then,
you’re drawing me
with ink and pen.
and every curve
you’re carving out
what I deserve.
and knotted hair,
of senseless care.
Between the breaths
of God and man-
You’re writing me
just as I am.
With fractured bones
and black-hole eyes,
ringed with lies.
All I am
is what you see
and what you make
is all I’ll be.
Dry ink in my head
I have no pen to write what must remain unsaid
caged words between my ears
imprisoned by frustrated tears of rage
that grow to fill a vast and empty page