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I stare at my reflection,
and hate everything I see,
ive turned into the person,
I swore I would never be.

I feel like a hypocrite,
in the worst kind of way,
and my life keeps getting worse,
every miserable long day.

I want so badly to change,
but it is the hardest thing to do,
I can't go back to how I was,
pain has changed who i once knew.

Im scared ill never escape,
the path I started walking on,
and even if I could get off,
Everything I love is gone.
 Mar 2019 Kalin R
J
Started writing how I feel, so I’d channel all this pain
Thought that maybe it would heal, all the **** inside my brain
Being lost became too real, pretending it was just a phase
No way out the doors are sealed, oh the monsters I create

I’m not proud with how I’m coping, it’s the only way I know
Substances run my emotions, welcome to the life of a broken soul
On the outside I look fine, but really that is just a show
‘Scars will heal give it time’ but life is moving way too slow

Patience ain’t a trait of mine, quickly losing all my hope
This life ain’t what I thought, wasting time is al I know
I got voices in my head, I got thoughts I can’t control
I am losing all my friends, guess I’m better on my own
 Mar 2019 Kalin R
Abi Cash
Habit
 Mar 2019 Kalin R
Abi Cash
It controls her
She can't stop it
It's a constant battle
She can't drop it

It has become a habit
She can't quit
It's taking over her body
Bit by bit

The scars fade
But the memories don't
She wants them to leave
But they refuse.. They won't

It's an on going battle.
It's a fight she never wins
It's a constant struggle
It's a war that never ends

It's her sweet escape
It gets her lost in her own place
She gets to control the pain
As her adrenaline starts to race

She grabs it off the dresser
As a tear falls from her cheek
She presses even harder
Reminding herself not to shriek

No one understands
No one ever will
This habit now controls her
As the world around her stands still

But now the room is spinning
Her head is getting light
She falls back in her bed
Refusing to put up a fight

She takes one last breath as she turns out the lights
Then she closes her eyes as she calls it a night
No one ever understands my scars
We fell in love, life was perfect for awhile,
Each touch was concentrated sunlight,
We'd kiss, I'd taste whichever flavor
***** we drank earlier that night.

Turned to you, I needed a friend,
Called to vent every day,
Time passed by us swiftly,
Had my heart, things finally felt okay.

Was the perfect romance for awhile
But as the summers and winters went by
Began to notice the thick haze we lived in,
Something different in your eyes.

Didn't know what was amiss,
Keep me waiting up all night,
Though I wasn't sure exactly what it was
Knew you were hiding something out of sight.

Uncovered more and more incessant lies,
Started small then grew, neverending,
We sadly floated further apart
With each secret text you were sending.

Was obvious there was someone else,
She took all of your time,
I figured you were buying her lots of gifts
Because you never seemed to have a dime.

Truth is, it was painfully clear,
Should have seen it at the start,
I was not the only one
Owning a piece of your heart.

The day I finally discovered who she was,
Identity of your seductive sin,
Is the day our world changed forever,
Your mistresses name was ******.
What do you think? I thought it was a pretty good idea. Does anyone else have any metaphors or similes they'd like to contribute for cheating compared to drug addiction? If that makes sense..

— The End —