i broke my legs and

        threw myself across your back
    
                  in the hope we'd soar.

Before you collapsed
back to the blank face of Ys,
back onto damp sands,

just for an instant,
             I stopped. (in my desk chair)
and saw
your spires, heard your swollen bells
                           and smiled in the sun.

You rose in earnest,
sang to the horizon(!)
the casual and the causal.

the waves eddied around
you and suddenly,
as easily as you drew
from the seabed,

you let me know,

everything that matters
(one day)
collapses.

there are a lot of angles
            to a dead fish:

for instance -- I miss you and loved you for who you were

+

I take responsibility for your passing.
(I stuffed you with pellets
I raised you in
the cruel waters of rural Australia
Alkaline screamed through your lungs
While I watched in wonderblivion)

+

I thank you for returning me
to stone turning and badly drawn animals
and most valiantly
(and at a poor cost)
getting me to pick the pen up again.

Here fell a water drop
taking his time
with few up to see him
he lays there supine

                        and
though this phenomenon
taunted my tears
I can't help but miss him
in this midnight blear.

I miss you Autumn,

your auburn leaves make death look

graceful on the path.

The fold-out mattress is a ***** tonight,
Sheets spilling over the side-
I'm awake,
Stiff in the dark,

And nothing sings on Baylis anymore,
And the silence stones me,
And I reach for a soul,
And she rolls over,

This is it.

Wasted in the summer,
Work by the morning,
Left to spoil by the night,

Writing pretty letters backwards in the bus window,
Feeling ****** when she doesn't see them,
Sixteen and blue,
Grabbing all that glitters.