Someone told me
"love looks at decent
ones "

I nodded, sighed, and smirked
but love
made me
like
this

Unleashed my curls
broke my walls
shattered
my people-pleasing
sharpened my poetry
silenced my loud voice
widened my eyes
encouraged my heart
undressed my façade
made me dance naked
in the face of judgement,
sing the songs of truth
and fall in love with
all things wrong
right, left, ugly, beautiful
and gave strength
to the choice that
always stood in the back
but now takes center stage

"Love left me right",
"Love leaving, made me write"
I replied

in the Universe of our minds
-it is easy to feel lost

that so a grounding is called for
-a coming back to Earth

to the moment-
Privileged Earthling Moments.

What do I have to do to get you to notice me?
Change my hair, the way I walk?
My clothes, the way I talk?
We've known each other for some time now,
Yet I'm still invisible to you.
My feelings run deep and how
I wish you only knew.
I see your face every time I close my eyes.
To me, you just seem so different from the other guys.
To you, I'm just a friend,
Nothing more, nothing less.
I settle for friendship in the end
Because I don't want to make a mess.
Instead, I'll keep my secret to myself
And take my pride back off the shelf.
Until one day you finally see
That you and I were meant to be.
I'll wait for now but not too long
Because sooner or later I'll be gone.
So when will you notice me?

Spreads sun atoms all over the place,
It feels like the planet will soon stop moving.
The wind, like a baby, is playing
                      -  is building staircases from leaves,
It spins them around, then rests.
Trows seeds in the air: oak nuts, mushrooms
and tears,
                and, like fainted lovers in the night,
Waits for a harvest of snowflakes

"your smile hid the teeth that made your lovers bleed"

Forgive me father, for I have sinned
I have drank from the sacred cup, tainting it with the atrocities of my mind.
Forgive me.
For I give you my life today and confess my faith in your son.
I dread the loss of heaven and fear the agonies of hell
Forgive me father
For I am not truly seeking forgiveness.
I have every intention of sinning again.
Letting it's sweet taste fill me up,
Allowing me to drink from the cup and experience salvation once more.

Love can make
you feel so vulnerable
yet so safe.
Love is indeed
the biggest
paradox
of life.

XI • VI • MMXXIV

︻デ┳═ー  

blood drips.
i can feel it on my fingertips,
i can taste it on your lips.

how did we get here?
i am drowning in fear.
there's no escape plan near.

they keep taking.
a nightmare waking.
we keep breaking.

the air is thickening,
gunshots quickening,
this is all so sickening.

blood pools.
genocide fuels.
american jewels.