​
Profanities coming out of her mouth while she hits.
The truth is being abusive she can’t admit.
And once again our family is split.
For your attention, I throw a fit.

​
i am trapped.
trapped in my own mind and trapped in this family.
overprotective is what you are.
i can’t grow, i can’t spread my wings and be free.
i am numb, to the point of no return.

let me be. free me from this misery.
because i don’t think i can take it anymore.
i’ve debated a million times in my head if i should leave.
runaway from this place.

maybe then i’ll be happy, but what if i'm not?
living in this world is stressful.
worrying about what other people think of me.
trying to live up to the standard that is our society today.

worry about my hopeless future.
there’s no point anymore.
no point in living in this tragedy.
i shall take this gun to my head and remove myself from this tragedy once and for all.
god, let me join you.

I nervously shake.
I stare and wonder in curiosity.
I look around and see all the socializing.
Oh how I wish I could socialize

But instead I sit in the sidelines watching.
Hoping someone will go up to me.
But of course that will never happen.
I get nervous trying to speak.
I can’t speak.
I desperately want more friends.

But that’s not possible.

You haven’t disappeared, have you?
Leave me, your child, here
Abandon me again

I don’t want to your hear your excuses
You are dead to me.

Don’t come asking for forgiveness when you don’t feel the slightest remorse for your infidelity.
Don’t come home yelling at me for being a failure when you were the one that raised me this way.

I am not your daughter.
I am the person you blame for your mistakes.
Go ahead.
Let your anger out on me.

Because I don’t feel anything anymore.
I only feel pity
Pity for you.

Sitting in the living room while you’re on the computer
What are you looking at?
Leaning closer and you turn off the monitor
Are you hiding something?
What could it be?

Knocking on the door everyday
Oh no, who’s that other woman?
That’s not mother.
Mother doesn’t look like that.
That’s not mother’s voice.

Why is she in our house?
Why are you taking her to your bedroom?
Don’t understand.

Too young to understand
Got older
Realized what he had done

Filled with hatred because of you
You’ll never be forgiven
Not from me, not from mother
Disappear from my life.

If beauty were to
be describe for
her,
It's not just the
make up she put
on,
Not just the
lipstick she
used.
It's how she gets
comfy before she
sleeps,
How she smiles to
the little
things,
How her eyes
would flicker to
something she
like.
It was always
about the small
things that she
does.

-HIY

An empty house is what they would call it.
You came into the house, you would see nothing pleasant.
Only the mold forming from the mess.
The house was slowly filling with termites eating up the walls.
The smell of death has overcome the house.

You could hear the sound footsteps behind you as you walked up the stairs.
You could only help but wonder if you would fall to your death.
For the stairs were so high, you could miss one & you’d die.

The house was not a house anymore.
It was vacant, it had no more memories.
No voices, it was empty.
The only thing left was for it to be destroyed.